141 tennessee jokes

  1. Why don’t Tennessee football players go to the zoo? Because they can’t get past the gate, even when it’s wide open.
  2. Why do ducks fly over Tennessee upside down? There’s nothing worth quacking about.
  3. Why did the country music star bring a ladder to Nashville? Because they heard the music scene was something you had to climb into.
  4. Why did the Tennessee state trooper carry a compass? Because he kept getting lost in everyone’s southern accents.
  5. What do you call a good ol’ boy from Tennessee with a bottle of champagne? A sparkling redneck!
  6. Why did the ghost move to Memphis? Because he heard the nightlife was dead exciting.
  7. Why don’t cows in Tennessee have any money? Because farmers milk them dry.
  8. How does a man from Tennessee take his coffee? Like his music, country strong.
  9. What’s Tennessee’s favorite card game? Nash-ville.
  10. Why did the baker move to Nashville? Because he heard the city was on a roll.
  11. Why did the scientist move to Tennessee? He heard there was a lot of chemistry in Nashville.
  12. Why don’t cats like to visit Tennessee? They can’t handle all the country mews-ic.
  13. What do you call a Tennessee carpenter who only works at night? A Nashville star.
  14. Why did the artist visit Nashville? He heard it was a great place to drawl.
  15. Why was the math book sad at the University of Tennessee? Because it had too many problems.
  16. Why don’t they play hide and seek in Tennessee? Good luck hiding when everyone’s too polite not to say hello.
  17. What does a ghost call Tennessee? The Volunteer “Spirit” State.
  18. Why did the detective go to Nashville? Because he heard there were a lot of country blues to investigate.
  19. Why did the computer break down in Tennessee? It couldn’t handle the southern bytes.
  20. What’s the Tennessee state motto? “At least we’re not Alabama!”
  21. Why did the vampire visit Tennessee? Because he wanted to get a taste of southern hospitality.
  22. How do Tennesseans separate the men from the boys? With a restraining order.
  23. Why was the tomato blushing in Tennessee? Because it saw the salad dressing up for a night out in Nashville.
  24. What do you call a cat who moved to Nashville? Kitty Chesney.
  25. Why did the belt get arrested in Nashville? Because it was holding up a pair of pants.
  26. Why did the scarecrow move to Tennessee? Because it heard the corn there was a-maize-ing.
  27. Why did the Tennessee river break up with the mountain? Because it felt taken for granite.
  28. What’s Tennessee’s favorite type of math? Country pi.
  29. What’s a Tennessee quarterback’s favorite type of art? The scramble.
  30. Why don’t they tell secrets in Tennessee? Too many open fields.
  31. Why did the book visit Nashville? It wanted to get bound in the Music City.
  32. How does a Tennessean catch a squirrel? Climb a tree and act like a nut.
  33. Why did the musician bring a map to Nashville? He wanted to scale the charts.
  34. What do you call a werewolf in Tennessee? A Nashville moonshiner.
  35. What did the donut say to the bagel in Nashville? “I’m a country roll!”
  36. Why did the chicken join a band in Nashville? Because it had the drumsticks.
  37. What’s the most common pet in Nashville? A songwriter – they can always pick up a tune.
  38. Why did the spider move to Nashville? He wanted to spin country webs.
  39. Why did the Tennessee player bring string to the game? To tie the score.
  40. Why did the broom go to Nashville? Because it heard the city was sweepin’ up the country music scene.
  41. Why did the Tennessee ghost go to school? He heard they were looking for school spirits.
  42. How do you know you’re from Tennessee? When you see a sign saying “Yard Sale,” and you pull over.
  43. What do you call a dog from Nashville? A hound dog, of course!
  44. Why did the bicycle fall over in Tennessee? It was two-tired from all the country cruising.
  45. How do you know you’re a true Tennessean? When you consider a “long trip” to be driving to the grocery store.
  46. Why did the sunflower move to Nashville? To follow its country roots.
  47. Why do Tennesseans make terrible secret agents? They can’t hide their southern charm.
  48. What’s a Tennessee dentist’s favorite time? Tooth-thirty.
  49. How do you make a Tennessee state trooper smile? Tell him Alabama is just a bigger target for the hurricane.
  50. Why did the golfer pack his bags for Tennessee? He heard the course was full of Nashville holes.
  51. Why do Tennesseans always carry a map? You never know when you’ll need to drawl.
  52. Why did the gardener go to Tennessee? She heard it was a great place to grow roots.
  53. What did the fish say when it swam into the Tennessee river? “Dam!”
  54. Why was the coffee mug empty in Nashville? It got mugged at the Grand Ole Opry.
  55. What do Tennesseans call a sunny day after a long streak of rain? Monday.
  56. What do you call a computer that sings in Nashville? A-Dell.
  57. What do you call a magical dog in Nashville? A labracadabrador.
  58. How do you recognize a Tennessean at a car wash? They’re the ones on their bikes.
  59. Why did the scarecrow become a Nashville star? Because he was outstanding in his field.
  60. How do you know if a Tennessean has been using the computer? There’s white-out on the screen.
  61. Why was the computer cold in Nashville? It left its Windows open.
  62. How do Tennesseans like their wine? In a jelly jar.
  63. Why don’t Tennesseans trust atoms? Because they make up everything!
  64. Why was the math teacher suspicious of her student in Nashville? He had too many roots in country pi.
  65. How do you make a Tennessean’s eyes light up? Shine a flashlight in their ears.
  66. What do you call a Tennessean who can play a guitar? Employed.
  67. Why did the football team go to the bakery in Tennessee? They needed a good “roll” model.
  68. Why don’t skeletons fight each other in Tennessee? They don’t have the guts.
  69. Why was the math book always nervous in Tennessee? It had too many problems.
  70. What did the football coach say to the broken vending machine in Tennessee? “Give me my quarterback!”
  71. Why did themusician store his trumpets in the freezer in Tennessee? He wanted to play cool music.
  72. Why was the computer cold at the University of Tennessee? It left its Windows open.
  73. What’s a Tennessean’s idea of a balanced diet? A moon pie in each hand.
  74. Why did the bread go to Nashville? It wanted to be a roll model.
  75. Why did the tomato turn red in Tennessee? Because it saw the salad dressing.
  76. Why did the gardener move to Nashville? He heard there was great soil in Music City.
  77. What’s the most musical part of a chicken in Tennessee? The drumstick.
  78. Why did the rooster join a band in Tennessee? Because it had the “chicks”.
  79. How does a Tennessean avoid clicking on phishing emails? They don’t have the internet.
  80. Why was the baseball team so hot in Tennessee? Because all of the fans left.
  81. Why did the musician always carry a pencil in Tennessee? To drawl notes.
  82. What do you call a bird that became a Nashville star? A tweet-heart.
  83. Why don’t people from Tennessee play hide and seek? Because good luck hiding when everyone says y’all.
  84. Why did the musician keep his guitar in the fridge in Tennessee? He wanted to play it cool.
  85. What do you call a dinosaur that lives in Tennessee? A Nashvillesaurus.
  86. What’s the hardest part about writing a song in Nashville? Trying not to write about your truck.
  87. Why did the scarecrow win an award in Nashville? Because he was outstanding in his field.
  88. How does a Tennessean hold up his pants? With a bible belt.
  89. Why did the plant go to Nashville? It wanted to make some roots in the music scene.
  90. What’s the difference between a dressmaker in Nashville and a songwriter? The dressmaker tucks up the frills.
  91. What do you call a snowstorm in Tennessee? A fluke.
  92. Why did the cloud stay over Tennessee? It wanted to become a country rain singer.
  93. What’s a Tennessee football player’s favorite board game? Sorry!
  94. Why don’t Tennesseans like knock-knock jokes? Because they always answer the door.
  95. Why did the cookie go to Nashville? It heard there were lots of country crumbs.
  96. How does a Tennessean count cows? With a cowculator.
  97. Why did the computer take its glasses to Tennessee? It wanted to improve its windows’ view.
  98. How do Tennesseans catch fish? By using corn bait.
  99. Why did the singer bring a ladder to Nashville? To reach the high notes.
  100. Why don’t you see penguins in Tennessee? They can’t handle the southern heat.
  101. Why did the chicken join a band in Nashville? It had the drumsticks.
  102. What do you call a dog that plays guitar in Nashville? A rocking hound.
  103. Why did the elephant move to Nashville? It wanted to join the country “trunk” music scene.
  104. What do Tennesseans call a bunch of musical notes that fight? Brawlads.
  105. Why do Tennesseans always know the way? Because they never lose their southern direction.
  106. How do you know if a Tennessean invented the toothbrush? If anyone else had, it would be called a teethbrush.
  107. What’s a Tennessee chef’s favorite cooking utensil? A country frying pan.
  108. What do you call a cat that sings in Nashville? Kitty Twitty.
  109. What did the traffic light say to the car in Tennessee? Don’t look, I’m changing!
  110. Why did the can crusher quit his job in Tennessee? Because it was soda pressing.
  111. What’s the difference between Tennessee and yogurt? If you leave yogurt alone for 200 years, it develops a culture.
  112. Why did the belt go to jail in Nashville? Because it was holding up a pair of pants!
  113. Why don’t they make ice in Tennessee? The lady who had the recipe moved away.
  114. What do you call a country singer who doesn’t have a girlfriend? Homeless.
  115. Why do Tennessee students always go to school in groups of three? Because they can’t even.
  116. Why did the picture go to jail in Nashville? Because it was framed.
  117. What do you call a song that you can’t get out of your head in Nashville? A sticky tune.
  118. Why did the pepperoni go to the music concert in Nashville? It wanted to meat the band.
  119. Why did the scarecrow go to the music concert in Nashville? It was a fan of Crow Country music.
  120. How do Tennesseans change a lightbulb? They don’t, they embrace the darkness.
  121. What do you call a horse that plays the guitar in Nashville? Dolly “Part-on”.
  122. Why don’t football teams go to Tennessee? They can’t find the goal line.
  123. How do you know your neighbor is from Tennessee? When you have a question, they’re always the first to volunteer the answer.
  124. Why did the flower go to Nashville? It wanted to bloom in Music City.
  125. How can you tell a vampire is from Tennessee? Instead of blood, they suck the gravy out of biscuits.
  126. Why don’t they drink Ice tea in Nashville? Because they haven’t figured out how to put ice cubes on a stick.
  127. What do you call an alligator in a vest in Tennessee? An investigator.
  128. Why did the fish go to Nashville? It wanted to get hooked on country music.
  129. Why did the orange go to Nashville? It wanted to be a country peel star.
  130. What do you call a bear with no teeth in Tennessee? A gummy bear.
  131. What’s the difference between a banjo and an onion in Tennessee? Nobody cries when you cut up a banjo.
  132. Why did the golfer bring two pairs of pants to Tennessee? In case he got a hole in one.
  133. Why did the grape stop in the middle of the road in Nashville? Because it ran out of juice.
  134. Why don’t they use bookmarks in Tennessee? The last page and the first page are always the same.
  135. Why did the fish blush in Tennessee? Because it saw the river bottom.
  136. What’s the difference between a guitar and a fish in Tennessee? You can’t tune a fish.
  137. How do you make a tissue dance in Tennessee? Put a little boogie in it.
  138. Why did the toilet paper roll down the hill in Nashville? To get to the bottom.
  139. Why did the scarecrow become a successful politician in Tennessee? Because he was outstanding in his field.
  140. Why did the donkey get a passport in Tennessee? He wanted to be a globe trotter.
  141. What do you call a fake noodle in Nashville? An impasta.

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