128 south carolina jokes

  1. Why don’t they play hide and seek in South Carolina? Because good luck hiding when you’re always saying y’all!
  2. Why did the South Carolina golfer bring two pairs of pants? In case he got a hole in one… or got caught in a swamp.
  3. Why do folks in South Carolina always know when it’s noon? Because the church bells start to chime before their roosters even crow!
  4. How does a South Carolinian find a lost thing? They stop looking, then it’ll come back – just like the tide!
  5. Why do birds fly over South Carolina upside down? Because there’s nothing worth pooping on!
  6. Why did the scarecrow become the governor of South Carolina? Because he was outstanding in his field!
  7. What do South Carolinians do when they see a space man? Park, man!
  8. Why did the South Carolina student bring a ladder to school? Because they were going to high school.
  9. What did the grape say when it was stepped on in South Carolina? Nothing, it just let out a little wine!
  10. How do you know your dog is from South Carolina? When it barks with a drawl.
  11. Why did South Carolina stop printing its state drink on their license plates? Because it was causing too many sweet tea- and traffic-related accidents!
  12. What do you call a South Carolinian who can play a musical instrument? A Charleston Charmer.
  13. Why did the tomato turn red in South Carolina? Because it saw the salad dressing… and the heat index!
  14. Why did the South Carolinian go to the baseball game? For the hot dogs, not the game, bless his heart!
  15. What does a South Carolina cat say instead of ‘meow’? ‘Me-y’all’!
  16. Why did the South Carolinian bring a pencil behind their ear to the BBQ? In case they came across some noteworthy ribs!
  17. How can you tell you’re in South Carolina? When your GPS starts speaking with a Southern accent.
  18. Why don’t South Carolinians play chess? Because they’ve been saying “checkers” all their life!
  19. Why did the South Carolinian bring a bag of chips to the party? Because they know parties without snacks are just meetin’s.
  20. How do you make a South Carolinian’s eyes light up? Shine a flashlight in their ears!
  21. Why did the South Carolinian refuse to play cards in the jungle? Too many cheetahs!
  22. What do you call a beautiful day in South Carolina? Just another day, y’all!
  23. Why did the South Carolinian go to the beach? To catch up on their wave vocabulary!
  24. How do South Carolinians catch a squirrel? Climb a tree and act like a nut!
  25. Why don’t oysters donate to charity in South Carolina? Because they’re shellfish!
  26. What do you call a South Carolinian who likes to read? A page-turning Peach.
  27. Why are South Carolina’s libraries so tall? Because they have so many stories!
  28. What do you call a South Carolinian who can’t sing? A Myrtle Mumbler.
  29. Why don’t they sell bubble gum in South Carolina’s zoos? Because the gators would blow the bubbles and scare the flamingos!
  30. What do South Carolinians call a place with no sweet tea? A nightmare.
  31. Why was the South Carolinian computer cold? It left its Windows open!
  32. Why did the golfer bring an extra pair of pants to the course in Hilton Head? In case he got a hole in one.
  33. Why did the South Carolinian bring a ruler to bed? They wanted to see how long they slept!
  34. Why are the trees in South Carolina so tall? They’re trying to escape the kudzu!
  35. Why do they never play hide and seek with mountains in South Carolina? Because the peaks always peak!
  36. Why don’t vampires go to South Carolina? Because they heard it has a high stake environment!
  37. How can you tell you’ve met a South Carolinian vampire? Instead of blood, they crave sweet tea.
  38. Why did the South Carolinian refuse to play cards with the jungle cat? They were convinced it was a cheetah!
  39. Why are South Carolina summers just like a good story? They both have a hot beginning, middle, and end!
  40. Why did the South Carolinian bring sunscreen to the party? Because they didn’t want the festivities to get burned out.
  41. What’s a South Carolinian’s favorite kind of joke? Anything served with a side of slaw!
  42. How does a South Carolinian catch a squirrel? Climb a tree and act like boiled peanuts!
  43. Why did the football team go to the South Carolina bakery? They needed a good roll!
  44. What do you call a fisherman from South Carolina who can play the guitar? A catch with a tune!
  45. Why was the South Carolinian bad at hide and seek? Because wherever they went, they always took sweet tea and everyone could follow the smell!
  46. Why did the South Carolinian get kicked out of the cookie factory? He took a day off because he felt a bit crumby.
  47. Why do South Carolinians always carry a map? So they can avoid the state of disarray!
  48. How can you tell you’re talking to a South Carolinian? They say “Bless your heart” instead of “You’re wrong.”
  49. Why don’t South Carolinians ever get lost in the dessert? Because you can always follow the trail of sweet tea!
  50. What do South Carolinians call a clever comeback? A Southern Snap!
  51. How do you know when you’re halfway through South Carolina? The accent gets thicker!
  52. What do you call a South Carolinian with an opinion? An expresso, because they’re strong and fast.
  53. What’s a South Carolinian’s favorite kind of math? Geometry, because it’s just plane fun!
  54. Why do South Carolinians always bring a pencil to the beach? In case they come across some sketchy seashells!
  55. What do you call a South Carolinian who can bake? A Charleston Chewer.
  56. Why did the South Carolinian go to school at the beach? Because he wanted to test the waters!
  57. Why don’t South Carolinians play hide and seek with mountains? Because the mountains always peak!
  58. What’s a South Carolinian’s favorite part of a joke? The punch line, as long as it’s sweet!
  59. What do South Carolinians use to fix everything? Duct tape and sweet tea!
  60. Why did the South Carolinian bring a fishing pole to the bar? Because he heard there were plenty of “catches” there!
  61. Why did the South Carolinian stare at the orange juice? Because it said ‘concentrate’!
  62. Why did the scarecrow from South Carolina win an award? Because he was outstanding in his field!
  63. How do you know if a South Carolinian is running for office? They start their speeches with “Well, butter my biscuit…”
  64. What’s a South Carolinian’s favorite type of music? Country, because it’s always in key…West.
  65. How do South Carolinians cut their pizza? With little Caesars!
  66. Why do South Carolinians never play hide and seek with corn? Because it always a-maize-zes them!
  67. Why did the South Carolinian go to the baseball game? Because he heard the pitches were perfect!
  68. How do you know you’ve met a South Carolinian ghost? They holler “Boo y’all!”
  69. Why did the South Carolinian bring a magnifying glass to the beach? They wanted to sea clearly!
  70. What do you call a South Carolinian who loves salsa dancing? A Charleston Chaser.
  71. Why don’t South Carolinians play hide and seek with hurricanes? Because they always come in the back door!
  72. Why did the South Carolinian stay close to the shore at the beach? They didn’t want to go into deep southern waters!
  73. Why did the South Carolinian take a nap on the beach? He was shore tired!
  74. Why did the South Carolinian stare at the Ford Mustang? Because it promised a horse of power!
  75. How do you know if a shark is from South Carolina? When it has a southern bite!
  76. Why did the South Carolinian get kicked out of the zoo? He was caught trying to feed the peaches to the monkeys!
  77. What’s a South Carolinian’s favorite spice? Cinnamon, because it makes their mornings roll!
  78. Why did the South Carolinian take a ladder to the bar? They heard the drinks were on the house!
  79. Why don’t South Carolinians ever play hide and seek with tornadoes? Because they always take the house!
  80. What do South Carolinians call a skeleton in the closet? A closet y’all!
  81. What do you call a South Carolinian who loves gardening? A Palmetto planter.
  82. Why do South Carolinians always bring a map to the party? In case the fun gets lost!
  83. What do you call a South Carolinian who can’t bake? A dough-nut!
  84. Why did the South Carolinian bring a spoon to the Super Bowl? Because they heard there would be a great bowl of chili!
  85. How do you know when a South Carolinian is happy? When their cheeks are as peachy as their fields!
  86. What do you call a snowstorm in South Carolina? A myth!
  87. Why did the South Carolinian bring a horse to the party? Because he heard it was gonna be a galloping good time!
  88. Why do South Carolinians never play hide and seek with their feelings? Because they always catch them!
  89. Why did the South Carolinian bring an umbrella to the computer repair shop? Because he heard it had a hard drive!
  90. What do you call a South Carolinian who can play the piano? A key player.
  91. Why did the South Carolinian bring a paintbrush to the game? They wanted to draw a foul!
  92. How does a South Carolinian comfort their friends? They say, “There, there, y’all…”
  93. Why do South Carolinians make great detectives? Because they always get to the bottom of things!
  94. Why did the South Carolinian bring a firecracker to the game? They wanted to have a blast!
  95. What do South Carolinians call a pretty girl who can fish? A good catch!
  96. Why did the South Carolinian put his bed in the fireplace? Because he wanted to sleep like a log!
  97. Why did the South Carolinian wear a helmet at the dinner table? Because the corn was ear-resistible!
  98. How do you know when a South Carolinian has been baking? When the kitchen smells like a peachy keen!
  99. What do you call a South Carolinian who loves to swim? A water bug.
  100. What do you call a South Carolinian who can’t cook? A Myrtle Muddle.
  101. Why don’t South Carolinians play hide and seek with clouds? Because they always rain on their parade!
  102. Why do South Carolinians always win at poker? They always have an ace up their sleeve!
  103. Why do South Carolinians love playing cards in the jungle? Because of all the cheetahs!
  104. Why did the South Carolinian bring a stopwatch to the competition? Because he wanted to have a good time!
  105. Why did the South Carolinian get a ticket at the pie-eating contest? Because he didn’t crust the stop sign!
  106. How do you compliment a South Carolinian? Tell them they’re sweeter than their sweet tea!
  107. Why do South Carolinians put their money in the freezer? Because they want cold hard cash!
  108. What’s a South Carolinian’s favorite part of a song? The Southern comfort!
  109. Why do South Carolinians always know where north is? Because they’re always heading south!
  110. How do you make a South Carolinian laugh on Saturday? Tell them a joke on Wednesday!
  111. What do South Carolinians call a group of musical notes? A southern scale!
  112. What’s a South Carolinian’s favorite part of a tree? The southern roots!
  113. What do South Carolinians do when they see green aliens? Wait for them to ripen!
  114. What do you call a South Carolinian who can’t dance? A two-left shagger.
  115. How do you know you’re at a South Carolinian wedding? Even the cake is in tiers!
  116. Why did the South Carolinian refuse to play cards with the jungle cat? Because he was convinced it was a cheetah!
  117. Why do South Carolinians always take the elevator? Because they’re always moving up in the world!
  118. Why did the South Carolinian bring a pencil to the barbecue? Because they wanted to draw some grill lines!
  119. Why did the South Carolinian stare at the can of orange juice? Because it said ‘concentrate’!
  120. How do you know when a South Carolinian is in a hurry? When they say “Hold your horses, y’all…”
  121. What’s a South Carolinian’s favorite movie genre? Southern comfort films!
  122. Why did the South Carolinian go to the library? Because they were booked for the day!
  123. Why don’t South Carolinians ever catch a cold at the beach? Because they always catch waves instead!
  124. Why did the South Carolinian bring an umbrella to the computer repair shop? They heard about possible Windows’ problems!
  125. Why do South Carolinians never play hide and seek with their problems? Because they always face them!
  126. How can you tell when a South Carolinian has been fishing? When their line is all cast!
  127. Why don’t South Carolinians ever play hide and seek with their dreams? Because they always chase them!
  128. What do South Carolinians call a beautiful sunset? Just another day in paradise!

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