134 green bay packers jokes

  1. Why don’t Green Bay Packers fans eat cereal? Because whenever they get too close to a bowl, they choke.
  2. Why did the Green Bay Packers bring a ladder to the bar? They heard the drinks were on the house.
  3. What’s the Packers’ favorite type of cheese? Fumunda… because it’s always found under their football.
  4. What’s the difference between a Green Bay Packers fan and a baby? Eventually, the baby stops crying.
  5. How do the Green Bay Packers count to 10? 0-1, 0-2, 0-3, 0-4…
  6. Why did the Packers’ quarterback bring string to the game? Just in case he needed to tie the score.
  7. Why do Packers fans always carry a map? In case they need to find the end zone.
  8. What’s the difference between a dollar bill and the Green Bay Packers? You can still get four quarters from a dollar bill.
  9. What do you call a Packers fan with a Super Bowl ring? A thief!
  10. How do you stop a Packers fan from beating you up? Offer him a cheese curd.
  11. What do the Packers and the Post Office have in common? Neither delivers on Sunday.
  12. Why did the Green Bay Packers go to the bakery? Because they knead the dough.
  13. How do you know if a Packers fan has been using your computer? There’s cheese dust on the keyboard.
  14. Why can’t Aaron Rodgers use the phone anymore? He can’t find the receiver.
  15. What do the Green Bay Packers and possums have in common? Both play dead at home and get killed on the road.
  16. Why did the Packers bring a car to the game? They thought the sign said “park here.”
  17. How do you know the Tooth Fairy is a Packers fan? She leaves cheese under the pillow.
  18. What do you call a Green Bay Packer in the Super Bowl? A referee.
  19. Why do Packers fans wear cheeseheads? To cover their hair loss.
  20. Why don’t Packers players drink tea? Because the Titans have all the cups.
  21. How are the Packers like my neighbors? They can’t pick up a single yard.
  22. What do the Packers and a Chick-fil-A manager have in common? Neither works on Sunday.
  23. Why did the Packers’ coach go to the bank? To get his quarterback.
  24. What do you call a Packers player with a Super Bowl ring? Senior citizen.
  25. How are the Packers like a broken pencil? They have no point.
  26. Why do Green Bay Packers fans keep their season tickets on their dashboards? So they can park in handicap spaces.
  27. What’s the best way to teach your dog to roll over and play dead? Have him watch a couple of Green Bay Packers games.
  28. What do you call a Green Bay Packer at the bottom of the ocean? A good start.
  29. Why do Green Bay Packers players never sweat? They don’t exert themselves enough.
  30. How many Green Bay Packers does it take to change a light bulb? None. They’re happy living in the Bears’ shadow.
  31. What do the Packers and opossums have in common? Both play dead at home and get killed on the road.
  32. Why don’t the Packers drink soda? Because they can’t protect the can.
  33. Why did the Green Bay Packers bring a ladder to the game? They wanted to finally get some points on the board.
  34. How do you keep a Packers player out of your yard? Put up goal posts.
  35. Why was the Packers football team at the bakery? They needed a good roll to win.
  36. Why don’t the Packers make ice cubes? They forgot the recipe when Brett Favre left.
  37. Why can’t the Green Bay Packers use the internet? They can’t string three W’s together.
  38. What’s the difference between the Packers and a dollar bill? You can always get four quarters out of a dollar.
  39. What do you call a Packers fan that has won the lottery? A millionaire who has never seen a Super Bowl win.
  40. Why did the Packer become a gardener? Because he finally wanted to get his hands on a bowl.
  41. Why are Packers jokes getting dumber and dumber? Because Packers fans have started to make them up themselves.
  42. Why did the Packer bring a pencil to the game? He wanted to finally draw a win.
  43. Why did the Packers coach go to art school? To learn how to draw a play.
  44. What’s the difference between the Packers and a teabag? The teabag stays in the cup longer.
  45. What do the Green Bay Packers and a magician have in common? Both do hat tricks.
  46. Why don’t Packers fans drink coffee? Because they can’t handle the cups.
  47. What does a Packers fan do when his team has won the Super Bowl? He turns off the PlayStation.
  48. Why don’t the Packers eat cereal for breakfast? Because they’ve lost all their bowls.
  49. What do you call a Packer in a Super Bowl? A spectator.
  50. Why do the Packers play at Lambeau Field? Because it’s almost impossible to play in a cardboard box.
  51. What’s the difference between a Packers fan and a skydiver? The skydiver knows when he’s going to hit the ground.
  52. What do the Packers and a dentist have in common? Neither can pick up a fumble.
  53. What’s the difference between the Packers and a mosquito? A mosquito stops sucking after you smack it.
  54. Why did the Packers fan marry his wife? She doesn’t mind sitting through another season without a Super Bowl ring.
  55. Why do Packers players prefer round pizzas? They can’t get used to anything with corners.
  56. What’s the difference between a Packers jersey and a barista’s apron? The apron catches more cups.
  57. Why was the Packer arrested in the library? He was caught removing all the bowls from the cooking books.
  58. Why do the Packers bring a bucket to the game? To carry their hopes and dreams.
  59. What do the Packers and an old bra have in common? Neither can support a single cup.
  60. Why do Packers fans carry around a picture of their team? So they can always have a good laugh.
  61. Why do Packers fans never play hide and seek? Because no one would look for them.
  62. Why do the Packers keep going to the farm? They heard there’s a lot of field goals there.
  63. What does a Packers fan do after his team wins the Super Bowl? He turns off Madden.
  64. Why do Packers fans take the stairs instead of the elevator? They can’t handle the pressure.
  65. What’s the difference between the Packers and my alarm clock? My alarm clock actually wakes up after snoozing.
  66. How are the Packers like my neighbors? They can’t pick up a single yard.
  67. What’s a similarity between a newborn puppy and a Packers fan? Both are cute until they start whining.
  68. Why do Green Bay Packers fans keep their season tickets on their dashboards? So they can park in handicap spaces.
  69. Why did the Packers fan bring a ladder to the game? He was trying to help the team get to a higher score.
  70. Why did the Packers go to the bakery? Because they couldn’t find a “baker” who could “mayfield” their team.
  71. Why are the Packers like a grizzly bear? Every fall they go into hibernation.
  72. Why do the Packers always lose at chess? They’ve lost all their bishops.
  73. What’s the Packers’ favorite type of music? Anything but “Queen.”
  74. What’s the difference between a Packers fan and a carp? One is a bottom-feeding, scum sucker, and the other is a fish.
  75. Why do the Packers eat their lunch at their desks? They can’t get near a bowl.
  76. Why did the Packers player go to school? To get closer to a “field” goal.
  77. What’s the difference between the Packers and a pinball machine? The pinball machine scores more points.
  78. How do you keep the Packers out of your yard? Put up a goal post.
  79. Why are Packers fans like mushrooms? Because they’re kept in the dark and fed a bunch of manure.
  80. What’s the difference between a Packers fan and a baby? The baby will stop whining after a while.
  81. Why did the Packers go to school? They heard there were some “grades” higher than an F.
  82. Why do the Packers always bring a ruler to the game? They want to be sure they’re not being short-changed.
  83. How do Packers fans deal with their team’s losses? They just “cheddar” it out.
  84. What’s the difference between a Packers player and a fat rabbit? One is a chunky bunny and the other is a bun-key chunk.
  85. What did the Packers player bring to the Super Bowl party? The chips, because he’s not used to holding a cup.
  86. Why do Packers fans have TGIF on their shoes? To remind them Toes Go In First.
  87. Why did the Packers bring a ladder to the game? They thought they could get a higher score.
  88. Why did the Packers go to the beach? They heard there was a “bowl” of “sand” which was better than no bowl at all.
  89. Why do Packers fans always carry a map? So they can find their way to the end zone.
  90. What’s the difference between the Packers and a bucket of garbage? The bucket.
  91. Why do Packers players go to the bakery? They like to knead the dough.
  92. Why don’t Packers fans ever catch a cold? Because nothing can catch in Green Bay.
  93. Why did the Packers player get arrested in a library? For trying to steal all the bowls from the cookbooks.
  94. How do you confuse a Packers player? Give him a “bowl” of alphabet soup.
  95. Why can’t the Packers play cards? They can’t handle the deck.
  96. Why do the Packers always carry a bucket to the game? To bail out their sinking ship.
  97. What’s the difference between a Packers player and a mosquito? The mosquito stops sucking.
  98. Why are the Packers like a broken pencil? They have no point.
  99. What do the Packers and Billy goats have in common? They both graze in the field and can’t get a touchdown.
  100. How do Packers fans cope with stress? By curling up with a good “cheese” book.
  101. Why did the Packers go to the beach? Because they can’t resist kicking the “sand”wich.
  102. How does a Packers player hold his liquor? By the ears.
  103. Why did the Packers go to the flea market? They heard there was a “bowl” for sale.
  104. Why are Packers fans like a bad detective? They can’t figure out a catch.
  105. What’s the difference between the Packers and a possum? The possum plays dead at home and gets killed on the road.
  106. Why did the Packers go to the garden? Because they wanted to finally get their hands on a “bowl.”
  107. What do you call a Packers player with a championship ring? A senior citizen.
  108. Why did the Packers go to the pet store? They wanted to know what a cheetah looks like.
  109. Why did the Packers go to the circus? Because they wanted to learn new tricks.
  110. Why did the Packers visit the zoo? Because they heard there was a “bowl” in the animal enclosure.
  111. Why did the Packers player sit next to the fireplace? Because he wanted to feel what “warm-up” is like.
  112. How are the Packers like a broken clock? They only play well twice a day.
  113. Why do Packers fans always bring a ladder to the game? They believe in getting their team to a higher score.
  114. How are the Packers like my neighbors? They can’t pick up a single yard.
  115. Why did the Packers player get a job at the bakery? Because his hands were perfect for kneading dough.
  116. Why did the Packers go to the grocery store? They heard there was a “bowl” of soup on sale.
  117. What do you call a Packers fan in a suit? The defendant.
  118. Why did the Packers visit the art museum? Because they wanted to see what a “bowl” looks like.
  119. Why did the Packers player take a nap on the field? Because he wanted to catch some “z’s” just like he catches balls.
  120. Why did the Packers player bring his dog to the game? Because he wanted to show him how not to fetch.
  121. Why did the Packers visit the candy store? They heard there was a “bowl” of candies on display.
  122. What do you call a Green Bay Packers fan with half a brain? Gifted.
  123. Why did the Packers player go to the kitchen? Because that’s the only place he can make a decent catch.
  124. Why did the Packers go to the bowling alley? Because that’s the only “bowl” they can get to.
  125. What do the Packers and the police have in common? Neither can catch a break.
  126. How are the Packers like my neighbors? They can’t pick up a single yard.
  127. Why did the Packers go to the farm? They heard there was a “bowl” of fresh milk.
  128. Why did the Packers player join a band? Because he heard they had good “catchy” tunes.
  129. Why did the Packers visit a cooking show? Because they wanted to finally get their hands on a “bowl.”
  130. Why do the Packers always bring a map to the game? They want to find their way to the end zone.
  131. Why did the Packers go to the mall? They heard there was a “bowl” of fresh fruit.
  132. Why did the Packers player take his girlfriend to the game? Because he wanted to show her how not to catch a bouquet.
  133. Why did the Packers visit a tea shop? Because they wanted to finally see a “cup.”
  134. What do you call a Green Bay Packers player with a Super Bowl ring? An impostor.

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