137 Seafood Jokes

Dive into a sea of laughter with a collection of side-splitting seafood jokes that’ll have you hooked! Whether you’re a fan of fishy puns, shrimply hilarious wordplay, or clever crustacean comedy, this article reels in an ocean of amusement.

Brace yourself for a tidal wave of giggles as we explore the depths of humor with witty anecdotes centered around lobsters, fish, shrimp, and more. From “shell-ebrated” clams to “sloths-ter” crabs, these jokes are sure to make a splash and leave you swimming in laughter.

Top 137 Seafood Jokes:

1. Why don’t fish play basketball? They’re afraid of the net!

2. What do you call a fish with no eyes? Fsh!

3. How does a lobster answer the phone? “Shello?”

4. What do you call a shrimp that’s a doctor? A first prawn responder!

5. Why did the fish blush? Because it saw the ocean’s bottom.

6. Why are fish so smart? Because they swim in schools!

7. What is a fish’s favorite country? Finland!

8. What kind of music do fish listen to? Something catchy!

9. What did the boy octopus say to the girl octopus? “I wanna hold your hand, hand, hand, hand, hand, hand, hand, hand!”

10. What do you call a lazy crab? A slothster.

11. What do you call a fish that knows addition? An Octoplus!
12. Why do oysters go to school? To improve their shell-fish-esteem.
13. What do you call a fish with a crown? A king fish!
14. Why don’t fish like to write essays? They’re scared of the final drafish!
15. How does a squid go into battle? Well-armed.
16. What do fish use to weigh themselves? Scales!
17. Why are lobsters so selfish? Because they’re shellfish!
18. What do you call a fish magician? A fish-tician.
19. What’s the difference between a piano and a fish? You can’t tuna fish!
20. How do clams communicate? Shell phones!
21. What do you call a big fish that makes you an offer you can’t refuse? The Codfather.
22. What did the sushi say to the bumblebee? Wasabi!
23. What do you call a cat that eats a lot of fish? Purr-anha!
24. Why don’t oysters donate to charity? Because they are shellfish.
25. Why don’t fish like computers? They’re scared of the net.
26. What do you call a fish that only cares about itself? A Selfish.
27. What kind of key opens a banana? A monkey!
28. Why did the fish live at the bottom of the ocean? Because they dropped out of school.
29. What’s an eel’s favorite dance? The electric slide.
30. What’s a fish’s favorite TV show? Whale of fortune.
31. What do you get when you cross a bank with a fish? A loan shark.
32. What do you call a dangerous fish who drinks too much? A beer-a-cuda!
33. Why did the octopus cross the road? To get to the other tide.
34. What is a shark’s favorite bible story? Noah’s Shark!
35. What did the clam do on his birthday? He shell-ebrated!
36. Why don’t shellfish like to share? Because they’re a little shellfish.
37. What do you call a shark that delivers toys at Christmas? Santa Jaws!
38. What do you call a mermaid on a roof? A fish out of water.
39. Why are fish never good tennis players? They have a hard time getting to the net.
40. What did the fish say when it swam into a wall? Dam!
41. Why did the shrimp refuse to share his treasure? Because he was a little shellfish.
42. What does an electric eel say when it’s frustrated? I’m shocked!
43. What kind of music do oysters listen to? Shell-n-B!
44. How does an oyster call his friends? On the shell phone.
45. What do fish wear to keep their eyes safe? Goggles!
46. What do you call a seagull that flies over the bay? A bagel!
47. What did the octopus say to its valentine? I’m really hooked on you.
48. What do you call a fish without an eye? Fsh.
49. How do you make a fish laugh? Tell a whale of a tale!
50. Why don’t shrimp share their food? Because they’re a little shellfish.
51. How do fish say hello? They wave.
52. Why don’t fish play soccer? They’re afraid of the net.
53. What do you call a fish who is the life of the party? The life of the prawn.
54. Why are dolphins so smart? Because they’re in school all the time.
55. Why was the fisherman bad at his job? He always let things slip through the net.
56. What do you call a fish with two knees? A two-knee fish!
57. Why was the seafood embarrassed? Because it saw the salad dressing!
58. How does a crab like to eat his food? Crackin’ it open!
59. Why did the jellyfish’s grades get worse? He was in a bit of a jam.
60. What did one prawn say to the other at the party? You’re really shrimpressive!
61. What kind of music do mussels listen to? Shell-n-Roll!
62. Why did the seafood blush? Because the seaweed.
63. How do you communicate with a fish? Drop it a line!
64. What do you call a fish that wears a crown? A sea king.
65. How do you know when a fish is full? It drops its food.
66. Why did the crab go to jail? Because he was caught pinching!
67. Why are there fish at the bottom of the sea? Because they dropped out of school.
68. Why did the lobster refuse to share his food? Because he was shellfish.
69. What do you call a lobster that won’t share? A shellfish shellfish.
70. Why do fish live in saltwater? Because pepper water makes them sneeze!
71. What do you call a fish with three eyes? Fiiish.
72. Why did the clam never share his toys? He was a little shellfish.
73. Why did the lobster blush? Because it saw the sea’s bottom.
74. What is a shark’s favorite science fiction show? Shark Trek!
75. What do you get when you cross a fish and a banker? A Loan Shark.
76. How do fish get high? Seaweed!
77. What do you call a fish that destroys Japan? Codzilla!
78. What do you call a snowman with a six-pack? An abdominal snowman.
79. What did the big flower say to the little one? “What’s up, bud?”
80. Why was the math book sad? Because it had too many problems!
81. What do you call a fish that has two knees? A tunee fish!
82. What do you call a fish that can give you a facelift? A plastic sturgeon.
83. What do you call a fish that wears a crown? A King Fish.
84. How do fish go into business? They start on a small scale!
85. Why don’t some fish play hide and seek? They’re afraid of being seen.
86. Why did the crab never share? Because he’s shellfish.
87. Why did the octopus cross the road? To get to the other tide!
88. Why do fish always know how much they weigh? Because they have their own scales!
89. Why did the vegan go deep-seafishing? Just for the halibut!
90. How do you make an Octopus laugh? With ten-tickles!
91. What do you call a fish that knows a lot of songs? A tune-a!
92. What do you call a seagull that flies over the bay? A bagel!
93. What do you call a fish with no eyes? Fsh!
94. Why did the lobster blush? Because the sea weed.
95. Why do fish live in saltwater? Because pepper water makes them sneeze!
96. Why did the tuna blush? Because it saw the ocean’s bottom.
97. What do you call a fish with three eyes? A Fiiish.
98. What did the clam do on his birthday? He shell-ebrated!
99. What do you get when you cross a shark with a snowman? Frostbite!
100. What do you call a fish that wears a crown? A sea king.
101. What kind of money do fishermen make? Net profits.
102. Why don’t fish play hide and seek? Because they don’t want to be found under the sea!
103. What’s the difference between a fish and a guitar? You can’t tuna fish!
104. Why do fish always know how much they weigh? Because they have their own scales!
105. Why do fish like to eat worms? Because they get hooked on them!
106. Why are fish so easy to weigh? Because they have their own scales.
107. How does a fish always know how much they weigh? Because they have their own scales!
108. What do you get when you cross a fish and an elephant? Swimming trunks!
109. How does an oyster hide? It clams up!
110. Why don’t clams give to charity? Because they’re shellfish.
111. What does the pope eat during Lent? Holy mackerel!
112. Why do fish stay in schools? Because they can’t afford to move out!
113. Why was the fish at the bottom of the ocean? Because it dropped out of school!
114. What do you call a fish with a crown? A king fish!
115. Why don’t fish play basketball? They’re afraid of the net!
116. Why do fish like to eat worms? Because they get hooked on them!
117. How do you communicate with a fish? Drop it a line!
118. How do you make an octopus giggle? With ten-tickles!
119. Why don’t oysters donate to charity? Because they’re shellfish.
120. What do fish take to stay healthy? Vitamin Sea!
121. How does an oyster get into school? By using the mussel!
122. What kind of music do fish listen to? Something catchy!
123. Why do fish live in saltwater? Because pepper water makes them sneeze!
124. What do you call a fish with two knees? A two-knee fish!
125. Why did the fisherman bring peanut butter? To go with the jellyfish!
126. Why do fish always know how much they weigh? Because they have their own scales!
127. How do fish get from place to place? By carpool!
128. What do you call a fish that can play the piano? A piano tuna!
129. Why are fish so smart? Because they swim in schools!
130. What do you call a lazy crab? A slobster!
131. What did the fish say when it hit a concrete wall? “Dam!”
132. What is a fish’s favorite color? Blue, just like the sea!
133. Why do fish live in saltwater? Because pepper water makes them sneeze!
134. What do you call a fish that only cares about itself? A Selfish.
135. Why don’t fish pass their tests? Because they work below C-level.
136. Why don’t oysters donate to charity? Because they are shellfish.
137. What do you call a fish with no eyes? Fsh!

Conclusion

From the depths of the ocean to the shores of hilarity, these seafood jokes have surely cast a net of amusement, making us realize that there’s something fishy and fantastic about a good pun. With every chuckle and giggle, these jokes have shown that humor, much like the vast sea, knows no bounds.

So, whether it’s a “fintastic” fish tale or a crabby punchline, let’s continue to share the joy of these jokes, spreading laughter as wide as the ocean itself. Dive deep, laugh heartily, and remember, when life gets a little murky, a good seafood joke can be the pearl that brightens your day!