149 Whale Jokes

Whale enthusiasts and humor aficionados, get ready to dive into a sea of laughter with a tidal wave of whale jokes! From puns to playful quips, these jokes are as immense as the ocean itself.

If you’ve ever wondered how whales crack jokes or what makes them chuckle (besides the occasional krill), we’ve got you covered. Join us in exploring the deep sea of whale humor as we delve into a world where these magnificent creatures and hilarity collide!

Top 150 Whale Jokes:

1. What do whales need to stay healthy? Vitamin Sea!

2. Why don’t whales use Facebook? They can’t click the “like” button with their fins!

3. What’s a whale’s favorite sandwich? Krill cheese!

4. Why did the whale cross the road? To get to the other tide!

5. What did the whale say to the dolphin? “Long time no sea!”

6. What do whales like to chew? Blubber gum!

7. What do you call a whale that’s always late? A tardy whale!

8. Why did the whale get a promotion? He was outstanding in his field… of marine biology!

9. How does a whale ask for forgiveness? He blubbers an apology!

10. What do you call a whale magician? A Houdini of the deep!

11. What do whales like to read? Moby-Dick, for relatable content!
12. What do you call a whale with no teeth? A gummy whale!
13. Why don’t whales play football? Because they’re afraid of the nets!
14. What’s a whale’s favorite TV show? Whale of Fortune!
15. How do you know if a whale likes you? They find you ‘fin’tastic!
16. Why do whales sing? Because they can’t talk!
17. What kind of whale can fly? An air-whale!
18. Why did the whale blush? Because it saw the ocean’s bottom!
19. What’s a whale’s favorite type of music? Blues, it reminds them of the ocean!
20. Why did the whale go to college? To become a ‘krill’iant scholar!
21. How does a whale make a decision? It flips a coin…into the ocean!
22. What do you call a baby whale? A little squirt!
23. What’s a whale’s favorite game? Swallow the leader!
24. Why did the whale get a timeout? He wouldn’t stop spouting off!
25. What do you call a whale who can’t make up his mind? A maybe whale!
26. How does a pod of whales make a decision? They have a whale of a time debating!
27. What do you call a secret whale? An undercover agent of the deep!
28. What’s a whale’s favorite pastime? Waving at ships!
29. How do whales communicate over long distances? Whale mail!
30. What’s a whale’s favorite dance? The blowhole boogie!
31. Why did the whale go to the theater? To see the orca-stra!
32. How does a whale get around town? He rides the current!
33. Why did the whale wear glasses? To improve his humpback vision!
34. What do you call a whale with a crown? The king of the sea!
35. What do you get if you cross a whale with a comedian? A blubbering mess of laughs!
36. What do you call a whale in a desert? Lost!
37. Why was the whale at the disco? He had killer moves!
38. What do you call a whale who loves trivia? A smarty ‘pods’!
39. How do whales cheer for their team? They wave their fins!
40. What kind of whale is always grumpy? A ‘crabby’ whale!
41. How do whales keep their skin smooth? They always use sand-blasting!
42. What do whales call it when they make a mistake? A blubber!
43. What do you call a whale’s wrinkles? Life lines!
44. Why did the whale go to the dentist? To fix his ‘water’ cavity?
45. What do you call a whale that never gives up? A deter-minnow-ted whale!
46. Why are whales so humble? They can’t see their own humpbacks!
47. Why don’t whales smoke? Because they can’t keep the water out of their blowholes!
48. What do you call a famous whale? A star of the sea!
49. How do you invite a whale to a party? Drop him a line!
50. Why do whales make terrible secret agents? They spout their secrets!
51. What’s a whale’s favorite novel? “War and Peace” – it’s got plenty of depth!
52. What’s a whale’s favorite chat-up line? “You must be a sea star, because I’m lost in your eyes!”
53. What do whales use to stay safe in the sun? Blubber cream!
54. What do you call a whale with bad posture? A slouchback whale!
55. How do whales decorate their homes? With sand dollars and shell ornaments!
56. What do you call a dramatic whale? A soap orca!
57. Why did the whale become a politician? He wanted to make waves in government!
58. What do you call a whale that plays the drums? A rock and roll tide!
59. What’s a whale’s favorite type of joke? Something that will make them ‘krill’ with laughter!
60. How do whales settle disputes? They have a whale of a debate!
61. What’s a whale’s favorite city? “New Whale-leans!”
62. How does a whale get his news? From the current events!
63. What’s a whale’s favorite instrument? The orca-stral harp!
64. What do you call a whale that loves fashion? A style-shark!
65. Why do whales make poor comedians? They can’t deliver the ‘punch’ line!
66. What do you call a whale that writes poetry? A bard of the sea!
67. Why did the whale join the circus? He wanted to show off his flippin’ skills!
68. What’s a whale’s favorite type of movie? Anything with a splashy ending!
69. Why did the whale go to the gym? He wanted to get a little more ‘krill’ in his diet!
70. How do whales stay in touch with friends? They use ‘Shell’ular phones!
71. What do you call a whale who can play the piano? A key-whale!
72. Why did the whale bring a suitcase to the beach? He wanted to pack a trunk full of sea memories!
73. What’s a whale’s favorite type of math? Algae-bra!
74. How do whales say goodbye? “Whale see you later!”
75. What do you call a whale that’s always relaxing? A chill whale!
76. How do whales get their mail? With a seal of approval!
77. Why did the whale bring an umbrella? He heard there was a chance of squalls!
78. What’s a whale’s favorite exercise? The spout jump!
79. What do you call a whale who can paint? A brush stroke of genius!
80. Why did the whale get a smartphone? To stay connected to the current news!
81. What do whales like to eat at BBQs? Plankton-kebabs!
82. What do you call a whale that’s good at bowling? A strike whale!
83. Why did the whale go to the bank? To cash in his sand dollars!
84. What do you call a whale that’s always smiling? A grin whale!
85. How do whales make up after a fight? They kiss and make up, on the ocean’s surface!
86. What’s a whale’s favorite type of currency? Sand dollars!
87. What do you call a whale with no eye? A “whal”!
88. What’s a whale’s favorite type of candy? Salt water taffy!
89. What do you call a whale who’s a great dancer? A ‘baleen’ dancer!
90. Why did the whale become a baker? He mastered the art of ‘krill’ing!
91. Why did the whale visit the psychiatrist? He couldn’t handle the pressure at sea level!
92. What do you call a whale with a sense of humor? A ‘krill’er comedian!
93. How do whales get their children to sleep? They tell them sea tales!
94. Why did the whale bring sunscreen to the beach? He didn’t want to get a sunburn!
95. What do you call a whale in a china shop? A disaster waiting to happen!
96. Why did the whale refuse to come out of the water? He didn’t want to ‘krill’ the vibe!
97. What do whales use to comb their hair? A whalebone comb!
98. Why did the whale join a choir? He had a ‘killer’ voice!
99. What do you call a whale that’s really good at hide and seek? A hide-and-sea-k champion!
100. What do you call a whale with an identity crisis? An ‘orca-ward’ situation!
101. How do whales wish each other a happy birthday? They ‘krill’ out loud!
102. Why did the whale refuse to share his food? He didn’t want to ‘split the krill’!
103. Why do whales make terrible DJs? They always skip the ‘reef-mix’!
104. What do you call a whale that’s a great artist? A ‘water’ color master!
105. Why did the whale become a tailor? He was great at ‘seam’stress work!
106. What do you call a whale that likes to gossip? A ‘krill’ bearer!
107. Why did the whale carry a suitcase? He had a ‘ton’ of baggage!
108. What do whales use to stay fit? A swim mill!
109. How do whales propose? With a ‘krill’ ring!
110. Why did the whale take up acting? He loved to ‘perform’ance!
111. What do you call a whale that loves gardening? A ‘sea’d lover!
112. Why did the whale bring a towel to the party? He wanted to have a ‘whale’ of a time!
113. What do whales say during a race? “I’m having a ‘splash’!”
114. How do whales like to celebrate? With a ‘whale’ of a party!
115. What do you call a whale that loves to travel? A ‘wander-whale’!
116. Why did the whale go to the library? He was ‘fishing’ for information!
117. What do you call a whale that likes to bake? A ‘flour’ whale!
118. What’s a whale’s favorite candy? ‘Krill’er caramels!
119. Why did the whale get glasses? To improve his ‘sea’ sight!
120. What do you call a whale that’s a good listener? An ‘ear-whale’!
121. Why did the whale go to the spa? For a ‘blubber’ bath!
122. How do whales like their steak? Whale-done!
123. What do you call a whale who’s always eager? A ‘keen’ whale!
124. Why did the whale become a chef? He had a ‘fin’ for cooking!
125. What do you call a whale that can sing? A ‘melody’ whale!
126. Why did the whale go to the restaurant? He had a ‘craving’ for krill!
127. What do whales use to fix anything? Whale duct tape!
128. How do whales enjoy their summer? By having a ‘whale’ of a time at the beach!
129. Why did the whale go to the museum? He wanted to see the ‘art’ic exhibits!
130. What do you call a whale that’s a good storyteller? A ‘tail’ teller!
131. How do whales like their tea? Brewed in the deep-sea!
132. Why did the whale refuse to play cards? He was afraid of ‘sharks’!
133. What do you call a whale that can’t stop laughing? A ‘giggly’ whale!
134. Why did the whale go to school? To become a ‘scholar’ship!
135. What do you call a whale who’s good at yoga? A ‘flexi’ whale!
136. What’s a whale’s favorite type of bread? ‘Krill’batta!
137. How do whales keep their clothes? In a ‘trunk’ of sea chest!
138. Why did the whale go to the concert? To see the band ‘play’back!
139. What do you call a whale who’s a philosopher? A ‘deep’ thinker!
140. Why did the whale refuse to move? He was being a ‘barnacle’!
141. What do you call a whale with no money? A ‘poor’poise!
142. How do whales get to school? By ‘school’bus!
143. What do you call a whale that’s good at soccer? A ‘goal’ whale!
144. Why did the whale refuse to share his toys? He didn’t want to ‘give’up!
145. What do you call a whale who’s a detective? A ‘sleuth’ whale!
146. How do whales invest their money? In the ‘stock’ fish market!
147. What’s a whale’s favorite type of pasta? ‘Krill’gnocchi!
148. Why did the whale go to the gym? To ‘workout’ his tail!
149. What do you call a whale that’s good at basketball? A ‘slam dunk’ whale!

Conclusion

As we sail away from this ocean of whale humor, we hope these jokes have buoyed your spirits and made you porpoisefully joyful. Whether it’s their colossal size or playful nature, whales and their jokes seem to resonate with our funny bones.

From krill-infused puns to whale-sized punchlines, these jokes prove that laughter truly knows no bounds, just like the vastness of the sea. So, the next time you spot a whale or crack a smile, remember, it’s always a whale of a time when humor swims your way!