57+ pigeon jokes

  1. Why do pigeons never get lost at sea?
    • Because they always wing it!
  2. What do you call a pigeon that finished first in a race?
    • A featherweight champion!
  3. Why don’t pigeons use Facebook?
    • They’re still stuck on Twitter!
  4. How do pigeons write secret messages?
    • With invisible ink!
  5. What do you call a pigeon that won’t leave the perch?
    • A sit-tin’ pigeon!
  6. What’s a pigeon’s favorite game?
    • Beak-a-boo!
  7. What’s a pigeon’s favorite type of news?
    • Coop scoops!
  8. Why did the pigeon join the gym?
    • To work on his pecks!
  9. What do pigeons give each other on Valentine’s Day?
    • Coos!
  10. Why did the pigeon cross the playground?
  • To get to the other slide!
  1. Why don’t pigeons play cards in the jungle?
  • Too many cheetahs!
  1. What’s a pigeon’s favorite pastime?
  • People watching!
  1. How do pigeons stay cool during the summer?
  • They sit next to the fans!
  1. What do you call a pigeon that’s gone bad?
  • A malfeatherant!
  1. Why did the pigeon get a time out?
  • He wouldn’t stop squab-bling!
  1. What do you call a pigeon who can play the piano?
  • A squab maestro!
  1. Why are pigeons terrible at hide and seek?
  • They always coo when they’re nervous!
  1. What do you call a pigeon that’s always at home?
  • A stay-at-coop pigeon!
  1. Why was the pigeon at the baseball game?
  • He was the team’s designated pecker!
  1. Why was the pigeon in therapy?
  • He couldn’t let go of his emotional baggage!
  1. Why did the pigeon get a promotion?
  • Because he’s outstanding in his field!
  1. What do you call a pigeon with a sore throat?
  • A hoarse cooer!
  1. What’s a pigeon’s favorite type of math?
  • Geometry, because it’s all about the pecking order!
  1. Why did the pigeon refuse to eat crumbs?
  • He’s a bird of fine tastes!
  1. How do pigeons make important decisions?
  • They wing it!
  1. Why do pigeons never pay for lunch?
  • They always put it on their bill!
  1. What do you call a pigeon that’s a comedian?
  1. What did the pigeon say to his mate on Valentine’s day?
  1. Why did the pigeon go to school?
  • To improve his pecking order!
  1. What’s a pigeon’s favorite band?
  • The Beatles, because they always have the best “tweets”!
  1. What’s a pigeon’s favorite type of exercise?
  • Flyometrics!
  1. How do pigeons drink their coffee?
  • On the fly!
  1. What do you call a pigeon that’s gone to the dark side?
  • Darth Feather!
  1. Why did the pigeon go to the party?
  • To shake his tail feathers!
  1. Why don’t pigeons use smartphones?
  • Too many buttons to peck!
  1. How do you know if a pigeon is rich?
  • It lives in a high-rise coop!
  1. What do you call a pigeon who doesn’t believe in Santa?
  • A dove-tful squab!
  1. What do you call a pigeon that can’t fly?
  • A walk-eon!
  1. What do you call a pigeon who can’t remember anything?
  • A forgetful flyer!
  1. Why do pigeons never get stressed?
  • They always keep their coo!
  1. How do pigeons prefer to travel?
  • On the wings of love!
  1. What do you call a pigeon with a top hat?
  • A coo-dini!
  1. What’s a pigeon’s favorite dance move?
  • The wing-tang!
  1. What do you call a pigeon that tells tall tales?
  • A squabble-rouser!
  1. What do pigeons say when they hurt themselves?
  • “Oh my wing!”
  1. What’s a pigeon’s favorite book?
  • To Kill a Rockingbird!
  1. How does a pigeon ask for food?
  • “Peck-nic, please!”
  1. What’s a pigeon’s favorite board game?
  • Squabble!
  1. What do you call a pigeon that can predict the future?
  • A clairvoy-bird!
  1. Why do pigeons make terrible secret agents?
  • They always coo their cover!
  1. Why don’t pigeons ever get lost?
  • They always follow the pecking order!
  1. How do you make a pigeon laugh?
  • Tell a coo-kie joke!
  1. What do you call a pigeon that’s afraid of heights?
  • Iron-wing!
  1. Why did the pigeon go to the bakery?
  • For the freshly baked breadcrumbs!
  1. What do you call a pigeon with a flashlight?
  • A light squab!
  1. Why was the pigeon at the computer?
  • He wanted to update his web-wing!
  1. What did the friendly pigeon say?
  • “Nice to tweet you!”
  1. Why did the pigeon refuse to go to the concert?
  • It was too coo-loud!
  1. Why did the pigeon sit on the telephone line?
  • He wanted to make a long-distance caw!
  1. What’s a pigeon’s favorite TV show?
  • “Game of Coos!”
  1. How do pigeons apologize?
  • They send a coo-pology!
  1. What do pigeons call a messy kitchen?
  • A “squab-ble” area!
  1. What do you call a pigeon at the North Pole?
  • Lost!
  1. Why don’t pigeons like fast food?
  • They can’t catch it!
  1. What do you call a pigeon on a diet?
  • A light pecker!
  1. Why are pigeons like politicians?
  • They’re always winging it!
  1. What did the pigeon say when it saw a cat?
  • “I’m feeling a little coo-nervous!”
  1. Why did the pigeon join the police force?
  • To crack down on illegal seed trading!
  1. Why did the pigeon bring a map to the party?
  • He didn’t want to wing it!
  1. What’s a pigeon’s favorite school subject?
  • His-turkey!
  1. What do you call a pigeon with no feathers?
  • Bald and coo-less!
  1. How did the pigeon propose to his girlfriend?
  • “Will you be my tweet-heart forever?”
  1. Why did the pigeon get a time machine?
  • To go back to the coo-stone age!
  1. What do you call a pigeon that’s a great painter?
  • A feathered Picasso!
  1. Why did the pigeon join a band?
  • He had the best beak beat!
  1. What do you call a pigeon that likes spicy food?
  • A hot squab!
  1. What did the pigeon use to fix his house?
  • Bird glue!
  1. Why do pigeons never play chess?
  • They’re afraid of becoming pigeonholed!
  1. What did the pigeon say after a long flight?
  • “That was un-coo-lievable!”
  1. What do you call a pigeon that’s a superhero?
  1. What’s a pigeon’s favorite type of music?
  • Beak-hop!
  1. Why do pigeons never go camping?
  • They hate to wing it in the wild!
  1. Why did the pigeon refuse to leave the poker game?
  • He was on a hot streak!
  1. What do you call a pigeon that’s scared of flying?
  • Grounded!
  1. Why don’t pigeons get along with scarecrows?
  • They’re just too corny!
  1. Why did the pigeon refuse to eat the sandwich?
  • It wasn’t on his peck-ish list!
  1. How do you know when a pigeon is mad at you?
  • When it gives you the cold feather!
  1. Why did the pigeon go to the dentist?
  • To check his peckers!
  1. Why did the pigeon join the track team?
  • He was a natural at the fly jump!
  1. What’s a pigeon’s favorite type of play?
  • A squawk-er!
  1. Why don’t pigeons ever get a haircut?
  • They’re afraid of shear terror!
  1. Why did the pigeon refuse to fly south for the winter?
  • He didn’t want to wing it in the cold!
  1. What do you call a pigeon that’s a great actor?
  1. What did the pigeon say when it was late for dinner?
  • “I flew past my beak time!”
  1. What do you call a pigeon with a low battery?
  • A depleeted pecker!
  1. Why do pigeons make good firefighters?
  • They always keep their coo under pressure!
  1. What did the magician say to the pigeon?
  • “Presto coo-jo!”
  1. How does a pigeon confess his love?
  • “I’m coo-coo for you!”
  1. What do you call a pigeon with an attitude?
  • A bird with a peckitude!
  1. Why did the pigeon get an umbrella?
  • To avoid feather damage!
  1. What do you call a pigeon that plays baseball?
  • A squab slugger!
  1. What do pigeons take when they’re sick?
  • Peck-cetamol!
  1. Why was the pigeon at the library?
  • He wanted to read a coo-k book!
  1. What do you call a pigeon who’s been knighted?
  • Sir Coo!
  1. How do pigeons send secret messages?
  • By using coo-de!
  1. Why did the pigeon join a motorcycle gang?
  • He wanted to be a Hell’s Squab!
  1. Why did the pigeon visit the psychiatrist?
  • He was tired of being cooped up!
  1. What do you call a pigeon that’s a computer genius?
  • Bill Gates-coo!
  1. Why did the pigeon get a suntan?
  • To become a bronze squab!
  1. Why did the pigeon go to Hollywood?
  • To star in “Birdman!”
  1. What’s a pigeon’s favorite dessert?
  • Pie-geon!
  1. Why don’t pigeons make good dancers?
  • They always wing it!
  1. What do you call a pigeon that knows karate?
  • Jackie Squab!
  1. How do pigeons avoid traffic?
  • They take the fly-over!
  1. What do you call a pigeon that’s a secret agent?
  • James Squab!
  1. What’s a pigeon’s favorite type of coffee?
  • Coo-lombian blend!
  1. Why did the pigeon refuse to eat the cake?
  • He was on a seed-only diet!
  1. Why was the pigeon in the kitchen?
  • He wanted to make a coo-kie!
  1. What do you call a pigeon that’s a life coach?
  1. What do you call a pigeon that’s an architect?
  • Frank Lloyd Squab!
  1. Why was the pigeon at the office?
  • He was the head of peck-quisitions!
  1. What’s a pigeon’s favorite type of tea?
  • Peck-mint!
  1. Why did the pigeon refuse to play the stock market?
  • He didn’t want to wing it and lose his nest egg!
  1. What do you call a pigeon that’s a famous singer?
  • Squab Marley!
  1. Why did the pigeon visit the fortune teller?
  • To get a peck into the future!
  1. What do you call a pigeon that’s a fantastic drummer?
  • Ringo Squab!
  1. What do you call a pigeon that’s a chemist?
  • A lab-coo-tory genius!
  1. Why did the pigeon go to the art museum?
  • To see the Peck-assos!
  1. Why did the pigeon refuse to play football?
  • He didn’t want to fowl up the game!
  1. What do you call a pigeon that’s a psychologist?
  • Sigmund Squab!
  1. What’s a pigeon’s favorite type of poetry?
  1. Why did the pigeon refuse to join the band?
  • He didn’t want to wing it on stage!
  1. Why was the pigeon at the rock concert?
  • He’s a fan of the Rolling Squabs!
  1. What do you call a pigeon that’s a mathematician?
  • Albert Squabstein!
  1. What do you call a pigeon that’s a famous athlete?
  • Squab Jordan!
  1. What’s a pigeon’s favorite type of pizza?
  • Peck-eroni!
  1. Why did the pigeon become a lifeguard?
  • He’s an expert at the fly stroke!
  1. What do you call a pigeon that’s a supermodel?
  • Naomi Squab-ell!
  1. What do you call a pigeon that’s an astronaut?
  • Neil Squabstrong!
  1. Why was the pigeon at the casino?
  • He wanted to play Squab-jack!
  1. What do you call a pigeon that’s a great chef?
  • Gordon Squabsay!
  1. Why did the pigeon become a farmer?
  • To tend to his peck of land!
  1. What do you call a pigeon that’s an author?
  • J.K. Squab-ling!
  1. Why did the pigeon visit the doctor?
  • He was feeling coo-ked!
  1. What do you call a pigeon that’s a movie star?
  • Squab Pitt!
  1. Why did the pigeon join the military?
  • He wanted to be a squab-adier!
  1. What do you call a pigeon that’s a journalist?
  • Squab Woodward!

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