100 Beatles Jokes

The Beatles, one of the most influential and beloved bands in the history of popular music, brought joy and creativity to millions of fans around the world. Their timeless songs and charismatic personalities continue to resonate with people of all ages.

But behind their musical genius and cultural impact, the Fab Four also had a lighthearted side. In the spirit of celebrating their legacy, we present a collection of Beatles jokes that will bring a smile to your face and perhaps make you appreciate their wit even more.

So, get ready to twist and shout with laughter as we delve into the humorous world of the Beatles.

Here’re The Top 100 Beatles Jokes:

1. Why did the Beatles break up? They couldn’t get over a hard day’s night!
2. Why did John Lennon always bring a pencil to bed? To draw his dreams.
3. What’s the Beatles’ favorite vegetable? The Beet-le.
4. What does Ringo Starr do when he locks his keys in his car? He breaks the window to get John, Paul, and George out!
5. Why did Paul McCartney install a doorbell? Because he wanted to Let It ‘B’-Ring.
6. What do you call a bug that loves music? A Beat-le.
7. What is John Lennon’s favorite hot drink? Instant Karmaccino.
8. Why was George Harrison always broke? Because all he had was a buck ’03.
9. What did the Beatles say when they finished their meal? “I get pie with a little help from my friends!”
10. Why did Ringo Starr get thrown out of the bakery? Because he wouldn’t stop playing the drum-rolls!
11. What’s the Beatles’ favorite currency? Penny Lane.
12. Why did John Lennon sleep with the light on? Because he didn’t want to Imagine a dark room.
13. What do you call a dog that loves Beatles music? A Sub-woofer-rine.
14. What do you call a time-traveling Beatle? Yesterday.
15. Why did the Beatles always carry an umbrella? Because of all the Octopus’s Garden sprinklers.
16. What is Paul McCartney’s favorite piece of furniture? The Long and Winding Road-chair.
17. Why did the Beatles always carry a paper bag? Because you never know when you’ll Come Together for lunch.
18. Why didn’t George Harrison ever get married in winter? Because Here Comes The Sun.
19. What’s Ringo Starr’s favorite exercise? The Beatles Press.
20. What’s the Beatles’ favorite color? Yellow Sub-ma-rine.
21. Why did Paul McCartney bring a ladder to the concert? Because he wanted to take the high notes.
22. Why did the Beatles take a cat on their tour bus? Because they didn’t want to be a band without a Bass.
23. Why did the Beatles stop playing football? They were tired of the Back Beat-le.
24. Why did the Beatles go to the zoo? They wanted to see the walrus named Goo Goo G’Joob.
25. What’s George Harrison’s favorite book? While My Guitar Gently Reads.
26. What did the Beatles say when they forgot their song lyrics? “Help!”
27. What’s the Beatles’ favorite type of math? Al-ge-bratles.
28. Why was John Lennon such a great writer? Because he had so many good compositions.
29. How does Paul McCartney like his eggs? Scrambled, because they remind him of his band.
30. What’s Ringo Starr’s favorite kind of bird? A Blackbird.
31. What was the Beatles’ favorite school subject? History, because they loved to Twist and Shout about it.
32. Why did the Beatles always carry sunblock? They didn’t want to Get Back a sunburn.
33. Why didn’t Ringo Starr ever get a haircut? Because he loved having a Beat-le-do.
34. What do you call a Beatle’s joke? A Fab Funny.
35. Why did the Beatles cross Abbey Road? Because they wanted to get to the other side!
36. What do you call a flower that listens to the Beatles? A Yellow Submarigold.
37. Why was the Beatles’ fridge always full? Because they needed Eight Days a Week’s worth of food.
38. What did the Beatles say when they saw a ghost? “I’m a Loser, not a ghoul!”
39. How does John Lennon make a phone call? He uses the Yellow Sub-ma-ring.
40. What’s Paul McCartney’s favorite type of bread? A Hard Day’s Rye.
41. What’s George Harrison’s favorite type of pasta? Rigatoni Starr.
42. Why did the Beatles make good gardeners? Because they knew all about Strawberry Fields.
43. Why did the Beatles never play hide and seek? Because John Lennon would always say: “I Found Out!”
44. What’s Ringo Starr’s favorite type of fish? Norwegian Woodfish.
45. What’s the Beatles’ favorite dance move? The Twist and Shout.
46. Why did Paul McCartney fail his driving test? Because he couldn’t get his car to Get Back.
47. What’s John Lennon’s favorite type of tree? The Norwegian Wood.
48. How does George Harrison cut his lawn? With a Yellow Sub-mower-rine.
49. What’s the Beatles’ favorite type of insect? Beat-les, of course!
50. Why don’t the Beatles ever forget anything? Because they have a Ticket To Ride down memory lane.
51. What do you call a Beatle’s fan in a hurry? A ‘Run For Your Life’ fan.
52. Why did the Beatles go to the moon? Because they wanted to play among the Starrs.
53. Why was Ringo Starr always lost? Because he kept looking for The Inner Light.
54. What did the Beatles say when their concert sold out? “We Can Work It Out!”
55. How did the Beatles organize their music files? In an “Octopus’s Garden” of folders.
56. Why did John Lennon start a bakery? Because he loved to “Roll Over Beethoven.”
57. Why did George Harrison never play hide and seek? He didn’t want to “Cry for a Shadow.”
58. What do you call a Beatles song in outer space? “Across the Universe.”
59. Why did Ringo Starr keep a journal? To write down all his “Paperback Writer” ideas.
60. What’s the Beatles’ favorite part of a joke? The “Twist and Shout” at the end.
61. Why did Paul McCartney always win at cards? He knew every “Hand to Hold.”
62. Why was John Lennon always late for school? He was stuck in a “Day Tripper.”
63. What’s George Harrison’s favorite time of day? “Here Comes the Sun.”
64. How do the Beatles like their coffee? With a “Ticket to Rye.”
65. What’s Ringo Starr’s favorite shape? An “Octagon” to represent the “Eight Days a Week.”
66. Why do the Beatles make terrible secret agents? They can’t “Help!” but sing about their missions.
67. What’s the Beatles’ favorite kind of bear? A “Blackbird” bear.
68. What did the Beatles say when they got caught in the rain? “Rain, I don’t mind. Shine, the weather’s fine.”
69. Why was John Lennon afraid of heights? He didn’t want to “Fall on His Face.”
70. Why did Paul McCartney make a bad carpenter? He couldn’t “Fixing a Hole.”
71. What’s the Beatles’ favorite fruit? “Strawberry Fields Forever.”
72. What’s George Harrison’s favorite meal? “All Things Must Pass-ta.”
73. Why did Ringo Starr get a map? He didn’t want to say “I’m So Tired” of getting lost.
74. Why did the Beatles bring a torch to the concert? So they could play “Here Comes the Sun” in the dark.
75. Why did John Lennon become a painter? To create “Artwork It Out.”
76. What’s the Beatles’ favorite type of car? A “Long and Winding Road-ster.”
77. How do the Beatles prefer their tea? “Steeped in a Daydream.”
78. Why does Paul McCartney hate playing chess? He doesn’t like the “Back in the USSR” move.
79. What’s George Harrison’s favorite animal? The “Octopus’s Garden” snail.
80. What did the Beatles say when they saw a shark? “Baby, You’re a Rich Fish.”
81. Why did the Beatles bring a stopwatch to the concert? So they wouldn’t “Wait” too long.
82. What’s Ringo Starr’s favorite type of dog? A “Hey Bulldog.”
83. What’s the Beatles’ favorite kind of candy? “Savoy Truffle.”
84. Why did John Lennon always carry a mirror? He wanted to “Look at Me.”
85. Why did Paul McCartney buy a boat? To go “Sailing On the Long and Winding River.”
86. Why did the Beatles always carry a compass? They didn’t want to be “Lost in the USSR.”
87. What’s George Harrison’s favorite drink? “Glass Onion” juice.
88. What’s the Beatles’ favorite type of bread? “Loaf Together.”
89. Why did Ringo Starr bring a pencil to the concert? To “Write It Down.”
90. Why did the Beatles carry a map? Because they didn’t want to be “Lost in Translation.”
91. What’s John Lennon’s favorite type of bird? “Blackbird.”
92. What’s the Beatles’ favorite kind of flower? A “Paperback Writer-ose.”
93. What did the Beatles say when they were late for a concert? “We’re Only Sleeping.”
94. Why did Paul McCartney get a telescope? To see “Across the Universe.”
95. What’s George Harrison’s favorite type of tree? “Norwegian Wood.”
96. Why did the Beatles always eat at the same restaurant? Because they “Can’t Buy Me Lunch.”
97. What’s Ringo Starr’s favorite type of horse? “Penny Lane-pony.”
98. Why did the Beatles bring a clock to their concert? To keep track of the “Eight Days a Week.”
99. What’s John Lennon’s favorite type of shoe? “Strawberry Fields Forever-wear.”
100. And finally, what do you call a Beatle’s lookalike? A “Fake as a Beatles.”

Conclusion

The Beatles may be remembered for their groundbreaking music and profound cultural impact, but they were also known for their sense of humor and wit. These jokes showcase the band members’ playful personalities and provide a glimpse into the camaraderie that made them so endearing.

From puns based on their song titles to clever wordplay inspired by their lives and careers, these jokes remind us that even legendary musicians can find joy in the lighter side of life.

As we continue to celebrate the Beatles’ enduring legacy, let’s not forget to appreciate the laughter they brought us alongside their timeless melodies. After all, as they famously sang, “All you need is love… and a good Beatles joke!”