150 jokes about beaves

  1. Why don’t beavers like fast food? Because they can’t bear to eat something they haven’t chewed on for hours!
  2. Why did the beaver break up with his girlfriend? She had too many dam issues.
  3. Why did the beaver wear a tuxedo to the river? Because he was going to a dam formal!
  4. Why don’t beavers use social media? They’re too busy working on their offline connections.
  5. Why did the beaver get a job as a construction worker? Because he was good at building dams!
  6. What’s a beaver’s favorite exercise? The log lift.
  7. What do you call a beaver who can pick up a tree? Sir Chops-a-lot.
  8. Why did the beaver go to the dentist? Because his “buck teeth” were costing him a fortune!
  9. What’s a beaver’s favorite type of music? Log and Roll!
  10. What do you call a beaver who’s good at math? A square rooter.
  11. Why do beavers make terrible secret agents? They always leave traces of their dam work.
  12. Why did the beaver bring a pencil to the river? Because he wanted to draw up some dam plans!
  13. What’s a beaver’s favorite fruit? Water-melon.
  14. Why did the beaver take up painting? He wanted to make a landscape that was just dam beautiful.
  15. What did the beaver say to the tree? It’s been nice gnawing you!
  16. Why do beavers hate spicy food? It makes their dam eyes water!
  17. What do you call a beaver with a bad temper? A dam nuisance.
  18. Why don’t beavers like to play chess? Too much time on the board and not enough in the water.
  19. Why do beavers make good friends? They always stick around.
  20. Why was the beaver a bad comedian? His jokes were too wooden.
  21. What did the beaver say to the lumberjack? “You’re cutting into my business!”
  22. What do you call a beaver who can play the guitar? A gnaw-star!
  23. Why did the beaver become an architect? He always had a plan for his next dam project.
  24. What’s a beaver’s favorite book? The Adventures of Huckleberry Finn, they love that river life!
  25. What do beavers use to fix their homes? Dam glue.
  26. What do you call a beaver with a map? A navigator.
  27. Why don’t beavers play football? They always go for the bark and miss the ball.
  28. What’s a beaver’s favorite pizza? Extra barkoni.
  29. Why did the beaver join the circus? He wanted to try his hand at juggling logs.
  30. What’s a beaver’s favorite dance move? The log roll.
  31. What do you call a beaver that’s always ready for photos? A cheese and dammer.
  32. Why was the beaver bad at hide and seek? He always stuck out like a sore log.
  33. What did the beaver say to the door-to-door salesperson? “I don’t need your products; I’m already dammed.”
  34. What’s a beaver’s favorite vegetable? Bark-oli.
  35. What do you call a beaver that’s a baker? A dough-gnawer.
  36. Why do beavers hate going to the beach? Sand is terrible for their dam construction.
  37. Why was the beaver a lousy gardener? He couldn’t stop gnawing on the wooden handles of the tools.
  38. Why was the beaver good at yoga? He was flexible in any stream.
  39. What do you call a beaver who can’t make up his mind? Inde-gnaw-sive.
  40. What do you call a beaver who’s good at fighting? A Kung Fu dam-ster!
  41. What’s a beaver’s favorite nursery rhyme? Row, row, row your log.
  42. Why did the beaver join a band? He had a talent for drumming on wood.
  43. Why don’t beavers like disco? They prefer to do the log dance.
  44. What’s a beaver’s favorite horror movie? The Bark Exorcist.
  45. Why was the beaver bad at basketball? He kept trying to dribble the logs.
  46. What do you call a beaver who’s a good listener? An ear-dam.
  47. Why was the beaver the best at camping? He always brought the essentials – wood and water.
  48. What’s a beaver’s favorite drink? Damson gin.
  49. What do you call a beaver who loves fashion? A Glamour Gnawer.
  50. Why did the beaver become a poet? He was inspired by William Shakes-pear tree.
  51. Why did the beaver bring a ladder to the river? He heard the water level was rising, and he didn’t want to fall short on his dam!
  52. What do you call a beaver who loves classical music? Ludwig Van Beav-hoven.
  53. What’s a beaver’s favorite school subject? Geography, because of all the river systems.
  54. What’s a beaver’s least favorite school subject? History. Too many deforested areas.
  55. Why did the beaver go to Hollywood? To star in the next big dam-edy!
  56. What do you call a beaver who knows how to party? A dam good time!
  57. Why did the beaver get glasses? So he wouldn’t miss a log.
  58. What’s a beaver’s favorite tea? Chai-mber of commerce.
  59. Why don’t beavers like thriller movies? They find them too dam scary.
  60. What’s a beaver’s favorite board game? Battleship. They love anything to do with water.
  61. Why don’t beavers like balloons? They keep trying to bite them, but they pop!
  62. Why was the beaver stressed out? His schedule was dam-packed!
  63. Why do beavers never get lost? They always know where their log is.
  64. What’s a beaver’s favorite movie? The Damfather.
  65. Why was the beaver kicked out of the library? He was gnawing on the book bindings!
  66. Why do beavers like to play in the mud? They don’t want to get stuck in a dam rut!
  67. What’s a beaver’s favorite math problem? Log-arithmetic.
  68. Why was the beaver good at playing cards? He always had a trick up his sleeve!
  69. Why did the beaver bring a flashlight to the river? He wanted to have a light dam snack.
  70. What do you call a beaver who’s an actor? Leonardo DiCapri-tree.
  71. Why don’t beavers go on rollercoasters? They don’t like to leave their comfort dam.
  72. Why did the beaver wear a hat? He didn’t want to get a sunburn on his dam head!
  73. What’s a beaver’s favorite Olympic event? The log jump.
  74. Why do beavers never cheat on tests? They wouldn’t dare to dam-age their reputation.
  75. What’s a beaver’s favorite band? The Rolling Scones – they enjoy rolling stones for their dams!
  76. What do you call a beaver who can’t stop eating? A dam-big-ton!
  77. What do you call a beaver who loves gardening? A dam-dener.
  78. Why don’t beavers enjoy magic tricks? They always know there’s a dam trick involved!
  79. Why did the beaver get a job as a barber? Because he’s good at trimming edges.
  80. Why do beavers make great detectives? They always find the dam clues.
  81. What do you call a beaver that’s a hairstylist? A dam dresser.
  82. Why did the beaver bring a map to the river? He didn’t want to miss a dam thing.
  83. What’s a beaver’s favorite type of pasta? Gnocchi, it looks like mini logs!
  84. Why was the beaver so popular? Because everyone thought he was dam cute!
  85. What do you call a beaver that can cook? A dam chef.
  86. What did the beaver say to the tree he just chopped down? “I’m falling for you!”
  87. What do you call a beaver that’s a writer? J.K. Rolling Logs.
  88. Why don’t beavers get tired of building dams? They find it re-leafer-ing!
  89. What’s a beaver’s favorite cookie? Chips Ahoy – they love the ship theme!
  90. What’s a beaver’s favorite type of joke? One with a dam good punchline!
  91. What do you call a beaver that’s a banker? A dam-ager of assets.
  92. Why did the beaver go to therapy? He couldn’t handle the dam pressure.
  93. What do you call a beaver that’s a lawyer? A dam defender.
  94. Why do beavers make great comedians? They know all the dam jokes.
  95. What do you call a beaver who’s a doctor? A dam-edic.
  96. What’s a beaver’s favorite superhero? Bat-maneuver, for his love of caves!
  97. What’s a beaver’s favorite game show? Wheel of Fortune, they love spinning the log-like wheel!
  98. Why did the beaver bring sunscreen to the river? He didn’t want to get a dam burn.
  99. What do you call a beaver that’s an engineer? A dam builder.
  100. Why did the beaver start a blog? He wanted to share his dam life.
  101. What’s a beaver’s favorite pastime? Log-rolling down the river.
  102. Why did the beaver go to the casino? He wanted to try his luck at the dam roulette.
  103. What do you call a beaver that’s a chef? A dam cooker.
  104. Why don’t beavers like fast cars? They prefer to stick to the dam speed limit.
  105. What do you call a beaver who’s a photographer? A dam shooter.
  106. Why did the beaver become a fashion designer? He thought he could make dam good clothes.
  107. What’s a beaver’s favorite candy? Licorice logs!
  108. What do you call a beaver who’s a musician? A dam player.
  109. What’s a beaver’s favorite kind of sandwich? A damwich!
  110. Why don’t beavers like to go on vacation? They don’t like to leave their dam behind.
  111. What do you call a beaver who’s a soldier? A dam fighter.
  112. Why did the beaver get a job as a teacher? He knew a lot about dam construction.
  113. What do you call a beaver who’s a scientist? A dam researcher.
  114. What’s a beaver’s favorite holiday? Wood-mas.
  115. Why did the beaver get a job as a gardener? He loved planting trees.
  116. What do you call a beaver who’s an artist? A dam painter.
  117. Why did the beaver become a sailor? He loved the sea’s dam waves.
  118. What’s a beaver’s favorite sport? Log-throwing.
  119. Why don’t beavers like to fly? They prefer their feet on solid dam ground.
  120. What do you call a beaver who’s a DJ? A dam mixer.
  121. What’s a beaver’s favorite day of the week? Dam-day.
  122. Why did the beaver become a singer? He had a dam good voice.
  123. What do you call a beaver who’s a mechanic? A dam fixer.
  124. What’s a beaver’s favorite breakfast? Log-cakes with syrup.
  125. Why did the beaver become a swimmer? He loved the dam water.
  126. What do you call a beaver who’s a movie director? A dam filmer.
  127. Why did the beaver become a carpenter? He loved to work with wood.
  128. What’s a beaver’s favorite pie? Log-berry pie.
  129. Why did the beaver become a firefighter? He was good at dam-pening fires.
  130. What do you call a beaver who’s an astronaut? A dam star.
  131. What’s a beaver’s favorite instrument? The log-o-phone.
  132. Why did the beaver become a writer? He loved to tell dam tales.
  133. What do you call a beaver who’s a police officer? A dam enforcer.
  134. What’s a beaver’s favorite type of bread? Whole grain with lots of seeds.
  135. Why did the beaver become a tailor? He loved to sew dam clothes.
  136. What do you call a beaver who’s a news reporter? A dam informer.
  137. What’s a beaver’s favorite type of coffee? Dam good dark roast.
  138. Why did the beaver become a librarian? He loved the smell of books.
  139. What do you call a beaver who’s a movie star? A dam idol.
  140. What’s a beaver’s favorite type of candy? Chocolate-covered logs.
  141. Why did the beaver become a baker? He loved to bake dam bread.
  142. What do you call a beaver who’s a politician? A dam speaker.
  143. What’s a beaver’s favorite type of pasta? Damatelle.
  144. Why did the beaver become a mailman? He loved to deliver dam letters.
  145. What do you call a beaver who’s a hairdresser? A dam stylist.
  146. What’s a beaver’s favorite type of exercise? Log lifts.
  147. Why did the beaver become a model? He loved to show off his dam style.
  148. What do you call a beaver who’s a computer programmer? A dam coder.
  149. What’s a beaver’s favorite type of cake? Log velvet.
  150. Why did the beaver become a comedian? Because he loves to crack people up with his dam jokes!

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