150 tuna jokes
- Why don’t tuna fish like basketball? Because they’re afraid of the net.
- What do you call a tuna that is an expert at poker? A card shark.
- How does a tuna fight? It uses its swordfish.
- What do tuna call human swimmers? Can openers.
- Why was the tuna always late? It couldn’t keep up with the current.
- What do tuna use for money? Sand dollars.
- Why did the tuna blush? Because it saw the ocean’s bottom.
- How do tuna greet each other? By saying “Nice to sea you!”
- Why did the tuna cross the road? To get to the other tide.
- What did the mama tuna say to her naughty child? “You’re in deep water now!”
- What’s a tuna’s favorite dance move? The fishtail wiggle.
- Why did the tuna never share its food? Because it was a little shellfish.
- Why are tuna cleverer than the average fish? Because you can tuna fish, but you can’t tune a chicken.
- What does a romantic tuna say? “I’m hooked on you!”
- Why was the tuna a great musician? Because it always stayed in tuna.
- Why was the tuna always sad? Because it lived in the can.
- What did the tuna say to the bully shark? “You’re not my anemone!”
- What’s a tuna’s favorite class in school? Alge-bra.
- Why did the tuna go to jail? Because it was caught in a net.
- What did the lawyer say to the tuna? “I’m going to scale back your charges.”
- Why was the tuna good at making decisions? It always mullet over.
- What does a tuna do when it’s in trouble? It clams up.
- Why don’t tuna like jokes? Because they’re scared of the punchline.
- Why did the tuna go to the party? To have a whale of a time.
- What kind of photos does a tuna take? Shellfies.
- What’s a tuna’s favorite song? “Salmon-chanted Evening.”
- Why was the tuna good at math? It always knew its scales.
- What’s a tuna’s favorite pick up line? “Are you a sea angel, because my heart is swimming towards you.”
- Why did the tuna join the circus? It wanted to be the “starfish” of the show.
- Why don’t tuna play hide and seek? Because they always get caught.
- Why did the tuna go to therapy? It had a lot of emotional bag-gills.
- What does a tuna wear to a wedding? A fish-tail suit.
- What’s a tuna’s favorite game? Go fish.
- Why did the tuna stop playing cards with the shark? It suspected it was a card shark.
- How does a tuna get around the city? It takes the seaweed.
- What do you call a tuna that’s gone bad? Offishal.
- How does a tuna get to school? By riding the octo-bus.
- Why was the tuna always at the bottom of the class? It found school too hard to swallow.
- What did the tuna say to its Valentine? “We o-fish-ally belong together.”
- Why do tuna live in saltwater? Because pepper water makes them sneeze.
- What do you call a tuna with a tie? Sofishticated.
- What’s a tuna’s favorite exercise? Squid lifts.
- Why did the tuna break up with its partner? It felt like they were drifting apart.
- Why was the tuna always in trouble at school? It was always caught talking on its shell phone.
- Why did the tuna go to the opera? It wanted to hear the high Cs.
- What’s a tuna’s favorite TV show? “Game of Thrones” because they always herring about it.
- What’s the difference between a guitar and a tuna? You can tune a guitar, but you can’t tuna fish.
- What did the tuna say at its graduation? “I’m finally off the hook!”
- What do you call a tuna that’s a great painter? A fine art-fish-ial.
- Why was the tuna voted as the school president? It promised more schools for fish.
- Why did the tuna go to the bank? To check its current account.
- What did the sushi say to the tuna? Wasabi!
- What’s a tuna’s favorite instrument? A piano because it’s always in tuna.
- How did the tuna win the race? It fin-ished first.
- What do you call a tuna who can’t keep a secret? A blabbermouth bass.
- Why was the tuna a great musician? It always knew the bassics.
- What do you call a tuna that flies? A skyfish.
- What’s a tuna’s favorite type of movie? Something reel-y exciting.
- Why did the tuna go to the hospital? It had a haddock.
- What’s a tuna’s favorite playground game? Salmon says.
- What does a tuna do when it loses its job? It goes on porpoise-less journeys.
- Why was the tuna the star of the basketball team? Because it’s great at shooting baskets.
- Why was the tuna the best chef? It had the best sturgeon-ry skills.
- What does a tuna use to fix anything? A hammerhead.
- Why don’t tuna play football? They’re afraid of the tackles.
- What do you call a tuna that doesn’t share its food? Selfish.
- What did the tuna say to its lazy son? “Quit loafing around and help with the kelp!”
- Why are tuna never lonely? Because they travel in schools.
- Why did the tuna become a teacher? Because it was great at explaining things in plaice terms.
- Why did the tuna refuse to play cards? The deck was fishy.
- What’s a tuna’s favorite kind of joke? Something fishy.
- Why was the tuna never good at hide and seek? It always stuck out like a sore thump.
- What’s a tuna’s favorite holiday? Christmas, because of the sand-ta claus.
- Why did the tuna join the gym? To do some krill-serious workouts.
- How do you catch a tuna in winter? Ice fishing.
- Why did the tuna go to the disco? To pull some-fin special.
- Why was the tuna the best detective? It always smelled something fishy.
- Why are tuna the strongest creatures in the ocean? Because they’re built like tanks.
- Why did the tuna never lie? Because it always told the trout.
- Why was the tuna a great comedian? It always cracked up the audience.
- Why did the tuna get an award? It was outstanding in its field… of seaweed.
- What do you call a tuna with no eyes? A “tun.”
- Why do tuna live in a school? Because they can’t afford a house.
- Why don’t tuna tell secrets in the ocean? Because the seawaves might overhear them.
- Why did the tuna get into politics? It wanted to make a splash in the world.
- What’s a tuna’s favorite mode of transportation? A fishcycle.
- Why did the tuna start a band? Because it had the bass down.
- Why did the tuna break up with the lobster? It felt like they were in a pinch.
- Why are tuna the best at hide and seek? Because they dive deep to hide.
- Why was the tuna always picked first for teams? It was a great catch.
- Why did the tuna go to art school? It wanted to draw a perfect seascape.
- Why did the tuna wear a crown? It was the king of the sea.
- Why was the tuna a great actor? Because it always played a great role on stage.
- What did the tuna say to the annoying jellyfish? “Stop pushing my buttons!”
- Why did the tuna join the military? It was ready for some-fin challenging.
- Why did the tuna refuse to play video games? It couldn’t handle the shark controllers.
- What did the tuna say after a bad day? “I feel like a fish out of water.”
- What do you call a tuna that’s a lawyer? A su-shi.
- Why did the tuna go to space? It wanted to see the moon’s surface.
- What do you call a tuna that runs a news channel? An anchor.
- Why did the tuna stop talking to the squid? It was tired of the ink-stant messaging.
- Why don’t tuna make good secret agents? They’re always getting grilled.
- Why was the tuna a good singer? It had perfect tuna-ty.
- Why did the tuna refuse to look in the mirror? It didn’t want to see its scale-y reflection.
- Why was the tuna a good DJ? Because it was always dropping the bass.
- Why did the tuna become a baker? It was great at kneading dough.
- What do you call a tuna with a great voice? A tuna serenade.
- Why did the tuna join the orchestra? It loved to play the bassoon.
- Why did the tuna visit the dentist? It had a bad case of gill-givitis.
- Why did the tuna get glasses? It wanted to sea better.
- Why did the tuna always have its radio on? It loved listening to the latest pop hits.
- What do you call a tuna with spikes? A fishy punk.
- Why was the tuna a great mathematician? It loved working with pi-rates.
- Why did the tuna never get stressed? It knew how to keep its cool in the heat of the moment.
- Why did the tuna get promoted? It was a great swim-ulator.
- Why did the tuna take a nap? It was feeling crabby.
- What’s a tuna’s favorite part of a song? The hook.
- Why did the tuna become a photographer? It loved to capture wave-ments.
- Why was the tuna a great swimmer? It never floundered.
- Why did the tuna join the spelling bee? It knew it could spell ‘fin’tastic words.
- Why did the tuna bring a sun umbrella to the beach? It didn’t want to turn into a sunfish.
- Why did the tuna visit the psychotherapist? It had a fear of nets.
- What’s a tuna’s favorite board game? Fish-opoly.
- Why did the tuna always carry a notebook? It loved to jot down its stream of consciousness.
- What do you call a tuna that’s lost its memory? Forgetting Nemo.
- Why did the tuna become a baseball player? It had a fin-tastic swing.
- Why did the tuna become a gardener? It loved to plant sea-weeds.
- Why did the tuna become a poet? It loved to pen down its o-fish-al thoughts.
- Why was the tuna a good rapper? It always spit bars.
- What do you call a group of musical tunas? A band on the fin.
- Why did the tuna visit the psychologist? It had abandonment issues after getting canned.
- Why did the tuna go to college? It wanted to get a degree in fish-osophy.
- Why did the tuna become a lifeguard? It wanted to make a splash in the saving lives business.
- Why was the tuna great at tennis? It had an un-bait-able serve.
- Why did the tuna go to the fair? It wanted to ride the ferries wheel.
- Why did the tuna become a politician? It wanted to represent the sea-tizens.
- What do you call a fast tuna? Speed-fin Gonzalez.
- Why did the tuna go to the desert? It wanted to experience dry humor.
- Why was the tuna a great detective? It had a nose for scents.
- What do you call a tuna in a suit? Fin-tastically dressed.
- Why did the tuna always have a smile on its face? It had a great sense of porpoise.
- What’s a tuna’s favorite type of coffee? Espress-sea-no.
- Why did the tuna visit the gym? It wanted to do some weight-swimming.
- Why did the tuna go to the library? It loved the smell of books and the quiet atmosphere.
- Why was the tuna a great comedian? Because it always knew the plaice and time for a joke.
- Why did the tuna become a cheerleader? It loved to flip and shout.
- Why did the tuna visit a tailoring shop? It wanted to get a custom fin-t.
- What do you call a tuna with high aspirations? Skyfin.
- Why was the tuna a great diplomat? It always knew how to scale down conflicts.
- Why did the tuna become an astronaut? It wanted to see the universe’s vast expanse.