86 slug jokes

  1. Why don’t slugs make good detectives? Because they always leave a trail!
  2. What did one slug say to the other who had been on a diet? “You’re looking slimy and trim!”
  3. Why was the slug at the bar? It heard they had salty language!
  4. What’s a slug’s favorite classical music? “Slugzart!”
  5. Why are slugs terrible at sports? They always slide home!
  6. What does a slug use to fix its shell? Snail glue!
  7. How does a slug keep up with the news? By reading the Daily Slime!
  8. Why did the slug cross the road? To get to the greener side!
  9. How do slugs settle disputes? They slug it out!
  10. What’s a slug’s favorite meal? Slugsgetti!
  11. Why do slugs never fight online? They hate salt-y comments!
  12. Why are slugs always calm? They know how to take it slow!
  13. What’s a slug’s favorite vegetable? A slugcumber!
  14. Why was the slug at the disco? It liked to boogie and slide!
  15. Why was the slug thrown out of the salad bar? It was too slow-ch!
  16. What’s a slug’s favorite type of math? Sluggishmetic!
  17. Why don’t slugs use smartphones? They can’t keep up with the fast pace!
  18. What do slugs wear on their feet? Sluggers!
  19. Why did the slug go to college? To become a snail-osopher!
  20. What did the slug say after losing a race? “I just can’t ketchup!”
  21. Why do slugs never play hide and seek? They leave a trail!
  22. Why did the slug join the orchestra? It had the slide trombone part down!
  23. What’s a slug’s favorite dance? The slow-mba!
  24. Why did the slug become a baker? He wanted to knead at a slow pace!
  25. How does a slug propose? With a slime-diamond ring!
  26. Why did the slug get a job in the post office? It loves snail mail!
  27. Why don’t slugs make good comedians? Their jokes are too sluggish!
  28. What’s a slug’s favorite movie? “Gone with the Slime!”
  29. Why do slugs never get lost? They always follow their own trail!
  30. Why did the slug bring a ruler to bed? It wanted to see how long it could sleep!
  31. What do you call a slug that can play the piano? A slimy prodigy!
  32. What’s a slug’s favorite part of a book? The slimeline!
  33. Why don’t slugs like talking to turtles? They’re too shellfish!
  34. Why don’t slugs like fast food? It’s not slow-cooked!
  35. What’s a slug’s favorite song? “Take It Slow”!
  36. What’s a slug’s favorite TV show? “Breaking Fast”!
  37. What do you call a slug with a honey business? A sweet slimer!
  38. How do slugs stay healthy? They keep a balanced diet of leaf and leaf!
  39. Why did the slug go to the art gallery? It was attracted to the still life!
  40. Why do slugs hate summer? Too much salt on the roads!
  41. What does a slug put in its coffee? Snail sweetener!
  42. What kind of stories do slugs tell their kids? Bedslime stories!
  43. What’s a slug’s favorite clothing brand? Slime Lauren!
  44. Why do slugs avoid political debates? They don’t like the mud-slinging!
  45. What’s a slug’s favorite sport? Slog-ball!
  46. What’s a slug’s favorite TV channel? The slime network!
  47. How do slugs get around the city? They take the slow bus!
  48. Why was the slug at the casino? He loves the slugs machine!
  49. Why don’t slugs like spicy food? It speeds up their metabolism!
  50. Why did the slug get a job in construction? He was good at laying the groundwork!
  51. What do slugs bring to a picnic? Slime-ade!
  52. Why don’t slugs make good secret agents? They can’t stick to the shadows!
  53. Why was the slug thrown out of the library? It was always late with the books!
  54. What’s a slug’s favorite day of the week? Slugs-day!
  55. Why do slugs dislike classical music? Too many sharp notes!
  56. What did the slug say to its crush? “You’re just my slime!”
  57. Why are slugs terrible at chess? They can’t make a move without leaving a trail!
  58. What’s a slug’s favorite game? Slow-motion capture!
  59. Why was the slug at the top of the skyscraper? It took the wrong slime up!
  60. How do slugs paint their homes? With a slimy finish!
  61. What’s a slug’s favorite book? “50 Shades of Green”!
  62. Why did the slug become a teacher? It liked setting the pace of learning!
  63. How do slugs travel on vacation? They slime-share a ride!
  64. Why are slugs bad at baseball? They always slide into home!
  65. What do you call a slug that flies planes? A slime pilot!
  66. Why are slugs bad at poker? You can always tell they’re bluffing!
  67. What does a slug say before a race? “I’m on the slime of my life!”
  68. Why did the slug go to the grocery store? It ran out of salt-free snacks!
  69. What do you call a slug who writes poetry? A slimy Shakespeare!
  70. Why are slugs bad at hide and seek? They always leave clues!
  71. What’s a slug’s favorite type of shoe? Slides!
  72. Why don’t slugs like to talk about their age? They’re afraid of growing mold!
  73. What’s a slug’s favorite hobby? Slug knitting – they’re great at picking up stitches!
  74. Why did the slug go to the yoga class? To learn the slimy tree pose!
  75. Why are slugs bad at math? They always find it hard to count quickly!
  76. Why don’t slugs like gossip? They prefer to stick to their own trail!
  77. Why was the slug always picked last in games? It was a slow-poke!
  78. What does a slug put on its toast? Jelly and slutter!
  79. What’s a slug’s favorite type of story? Slow-mances!
  80. Why did the slug join the gym? To work on its sliminess!
  81. Why don’t slugs use credit cards? They hate fast transactions!
  82. Why did the slug go to the car wash? To get a slime shine!
  83. What’s a slug’s favorite type of coffee? Slow roast!
  84. Why are slugs bad at racing? They always finish last!
  85. Why did the slug join the circus? To be part of the slow-motion trapeze act!
  86. Why don’t slugs like surprises? They prefer to take things slow!

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