150 rock and roll jokes
- Why don’t rock stars ever get lost? Because they always take the high road.
- Why did the drummer break up with his girlfriend? Because he said she had too many hit singles!
- What do you call a rockstar who can’t sing? A Rolling Stone.
- Why was the guitar teacher arrested? For fingering A minor.
- Why are rock stars good at multitasking? Because they can shred and headbang at the same time.
- Why do rockers always have a map? Because they need to know where to draw the line.
- What do you call a rock star without a girlfriend? Homeless.
- Why was the rock star’s book so poorly written? Because it was full of heavy metal-aphors.
- Why was the rock guitarist shocked? He touched a power chord.
- Why did the rock star get kicked out of the library? He wasn’t allowed to Rock and Read.
- Why do rock stars love geometry? Because it’s all about the angles.
- Why do bass players often stand with their back to the audience? Because it’s less embarrassing than having to face the music!
- Why did the rock star go to jail? Because he broke a string.
- What’s the most frightening thing for a rock star? A solo operation.
- What’s a rockstar’s favorite type of story? A power chord-er.
- What did the guitarist do when his teacher told him to turn in his essay? He told her “I ain’t no snitch!”
- Why don’t rock stars use doorbells? Because they want to knock and roll.
- Why did the rock star go fishing? He wanted to catch some bass.
- Why did the guitarist go to jail? Because he fingered the wrong minor chord.
- Why was the rock band arrested at the airport? They were caught with their amps up.
- What do you call a sleeping drummer? A beat rest.
- What do you call a rock star without an audience? Unplugged.
- Why did the rockstar get fired from his job at the bakery? He couldn’t stop jamming the dough.
- Why do rock stars hate earplugs? Because they’re always stopping the sound check.
- Why did the lead singer become a gardener? He wanted to grow his band base.
- What do you call a guitarist who only knows one chord? A one-hit wonder.
- What’s a rock star’s favorite breakfast? A roll with jam.
- Why did the rock star go to the therapist? He couldn’t handle his fan-tasies.
- What do you call a rock star that became a politician? A music manifesto.
- Why was the rock star bad at baseball? He could never get a good hit.
- How does a rockstar pay his bills? With his net band income.
- What did the rock star say to the credit card? “I can’t pay you, I’m in band-ruptcy.”
- Why did the rockstar become a painter? He wanted to draw the line somewhere.
- Why was the rockstar bad at soccer? He always wanted to rock the goal.
- Why was the guitarist always in trouble? He was always picking something.
- Why did the drummer sit at the end of the boat? To rock the boat.
- Why did the rock star fail his driving test? He couldn’t get into the right gear.
- Why did the bassist get locked out of his own concert? He dropped the bass.
- Why was the rock star good at basketball? He was always making a jam shot.
- What do you call a rock star who only performs at night? A moon-rocker.
- Why did the rock star become a philosopher? He was always in deep thought about the meaning of his lyrics.
- Why did the rock star fail his math test? Because he thought pi was only a number in a song.
- What do you call a rock star that became a pilot? An Aerosmith.
- Why was the rockstar bad at cooking? He always burned the rolls.
- Why did the rock star go to the moon? He wanted to start a space jam.
- What do you call a rock star with a cold? Achoo Fighter.
- Why did the rock star bring a ladder to his concert? He wanted to reach the high notes.
- What do you call a rock star with no fans? A pebble.
- Why did the rock star flunk out of school? His grades were always on the rocks.
- Why did the guitarist get locked out of his house? He lost his keys…and the chords.
- Why did the rock star get a job at the bakery? Because he kneaded the dough.
- What do you call a rock star who loves chess? A pawn star.
- Why did the rock star go camping? He wanted to rock and roll out his sleeping bag.
- Why did the rock star become a gardener? He wanted to make his own flower power.
- What do you call a quiet rock star? A whispering Willow Smith.
- Why did the rock star refuse to play cards? He was afraid of the suit and tie.
- What’s a rock star’s favorite vegetable? Rock-oli.
- What do you call a rockstar’s autobiography? A record of his life.
- Why was the rock star on a diet? He had too many rolls.
- Why was the rockstar good at tennis? He had a great backbeat.
- What do you call a rock star with a lot of tattoos? An illustrated edition.
- Why did the rockstar wear sunglasses at night? He didn’t want to be recognized by his fans.
- What do you call a guitar that never finishes a song? A string-along.
- Why did the rockstar become a banker? He wanted to get his hands on more notes.
- Why do rockstars have such messy hair? They always rock it out.
- Why did the rockstar eat at the sushi restaurant? He wanted to try the rock n’ roll.
- What do you call a rockstar who became a lawyer? A suit and tie-dye.
- Why did the rockstar join the circus? He wanted to be a high-flyer.
- Why did the rock star bring a broom to his concert? He wanted to sweep his fans off their feet.
- Why was the rock star good at boxing? He was always on the beat.
- What do you call a rockstar who can’t keep a beat? A rock and roller-coaster.
- Why did the rockstar bring a basket to the concert? He heard there would be plenty of jams.
- What do you call a rockstar who can’t find his guitar? A solo artist.
- Why did the rockstar get a job at the zoo? He wanted to be around more heavy metal.
- Why did the rockstar bring a compass to his concert? He wanted to find his way to the top.
- Why was the rock star always in the gym? He was trying to get more toned.
- What do you call a rockstar who became a teacher? A class act.
- Why did the rockstar go to culinary school? He wanted to make some sweet jams.
- What do you call a rockstar who can’t stay on stage? A falling star.
- Why did the rockstar become a mailman? He had too many fans to deliver to.
- Why was the rock star always carrying a pen? He was always ready to rock and roll out an autograph.
- What do you call a rockstar who became a lifeguard? A wave maker.
- Why did the rockstar buy a horse? He wanted to rock the saddle.
- What do you call a rockstar who loves hiking? A rock climber.
- Why did the rockstar go to the museum? He was looking for classic rock.
- What do you call a rockstar who is always sleepy? A day dreamer.
- Why did the rockstar become a chef? He was good at cooking up a storm.
- What do you call a rockstar who loves to bake? A bun Jovi.
- Why did the rockstar go to the beach? He wanted to surf the waves.
- What do you call a rockstar who became a detective? A Rolling Snoop.
- Why was the rockstar always on his phone? He was tweeting to his followers.
- What do you call a rockstar who is always late? A time bandit.
- Why did the rockstar go to a farm? He wanted to feed the animals.
- What do you call a rockstar who loves gardening? A plant Jovi.
- Why did the rockstar bring a clock to his concert? He wanted to beat the time.
- What do you call a rockstar who became a barber? A shear genius.
- Why was the rockstar always at the library? He wanted to read the classics.
- What do you call a rockstar who loves to fish? A bass master.
- Why did the rockstar become a photographer? He wanted to shoot the stars.
- What do you call a rockstar who became a doctor? A medicine man.
- Why did the rockstar go to the mechanic? His engine was always running hot.
- What do you call a rockstar who loves astronomy? A star gazer.
- Why did the rockstar become a baker? He wanted to roll out the dough.
- What do you call a rockstar who became a pilot? A jet setter.
- Why did the rockstar bring a calculator to his concert? He wanted to count the beats.
- What do you call a rockstar who loves mathematics? A number cruncher.
- Why did the rockstar go to the spa? He wanted to feel the rhythm of the water.
- What do you call a rockstar who became a fashion designer? A style icon.
- Why did the rockstar become a florist? He wanted to arrange the roses.
- What do you call a rockstar who loves to write? A word smith.
- Why did the rockstar go to the casino? He wanted to hit the jackpot.
- What do you call a rockstar who became a poet? A lyricist.
- Why did the rockstar go to the dentist? He had a cavity in his sound.
- What do you call a rockstar who loves to swim? A water baby.
- Why did the rockstar go to the theatre? He wanted to be a drama king.
- What do you call a rockstar who loves to dance? A toe tapper.
- Why did the rockstar become a janitor? He wanted to sweep the stage.
- What do you call a rockstar who loves to play golf? A hole in one.
- Why did the rockstar go to the grocery store? He wanted to pick some fresh beats.
- What do you call a rockstar who became a baker? A dough boy.
- Why did the rockstar become a landscaper? He wanted to rock the garden.
- What do you call a rockstar who loves to sail? A sea dog.
- Why did the rockstar go to the gym? He wanted to pump up the jam.
- What do you call a rockstar who became a chef? A taste tester.
- Why did the rockstar become a botanist? He wanted to study the roots.
- What do you call a rockstar who loves yoga? A zen master.
- Why did the rockstar go to the bakery? He wanted to rock the rolls.
- What do you call a rockstar who became a farmer? A land lover.
- Why did the rockstar become a taxi driver? He wanted to hit the road.
- What do you call a rockstar who loves to jog? A road runner.
- Why did the rockstar go to the pet shop? He wanted to buy a rockstar.
- What do you call a rockstar who became a teacher? A note taker.
- Why did the rockstar become a sailor? He wanted to rock the boat.
- What do you call a rockstar who loves to cycle? A wheel spinner.
- Why did the rockstar go to the ice cream shop? He wanted to chill out.
- What do you call a rockstar who became a carpenter? A woodworker.
- Why did the rockstar go to the candy store? He wanted to pick up some rock candy.
- What do you call a rockstar who loves animals? A pet rocker.
- Why did the rockstar become a jeweler? He wanted to rock the gems.
- What do you call a rockstar who became a firefighter? A flame thrower.
- Why did the rockstar go to the museum? He wanted to see the rocks.
- What do you call a rockstar who loves skiing? A snow rocker.
- Why did the rockstar become a gardener? He wanted to rock the flowers.
- What do you call a rockstar who became a zookeeper? An animal lover.
- Why did the rockstar go to the ice cream shop? He wanted to taste the vanilla rock.
- What do you call a rockstar who became a vet? A pet doctor.
- Why did the rockstar go to the farm? He wanted to rock the hay.
- What do you call a rockstar who became a gardener? A green thumb.
- Why did the rockstar go to the aquarium? He wanted to rock the water.
- What do you call a rockstar who loves to paint? A color rocker.