150 painter jokes

  1. Why don’t artists ever win at poker? They always try to draw.
  2. How does a painter say goodbye? “I’ll catch you on the canvas side.”
  3. Why did the artist carry an easel? He wanted to draw on experience.
  4. What does an artist use to call his friends? A “palette-phone.”
  5. Why was the painter always calm? He knew he could always brush it off.
  6. Why was the artist a bad cook? He kept trying to mix the colors of the vegetables.
  7. Why did the artist get in trouble at school? Because he couldn’t stay within the lines.
  8. How does an artist flirt? By giving you a little sketch.
  9. Why was the painting a gossip? Because it kept spreading rumors in different shades.
  10. Why did the painter go to jail? Because he got caught framing someone.
  11. How do you compliment an artist? Tell them their work is a “stroke” of genius.
  12. Why was the painter’s house messy? Because he had too many “still lifes” lying around.
  13. What do you call a fast painter? A brush with speed.
  14. Why did the artist go to therapy? He had too many sketchy thoughts.
  15. Why don’t artists play hide and seek? Because good luck hiding when you’re always being drawn.
  16. What’s an artist’s favorite type of math? Geometry, because it’s all about the shapes.
  17. Why was the painting a great detective? It could always canvas the area.
  18. Why don’t painters get lost? Because they always know their way around a palette.
  19. What’s a painter’s favorite time of day? The golden hour, for the light it brings.
  20. What do you call a painter who only uses red, yellow, and blue? A primary school teacher.
  21. Why did the painter go to the bakery? He heard they had excellent “rolls.”
  22. Why do painters make poor comedians? Because they always draw a blank.
  23. Why was the painter always broke? He kept using up all his “canvas.”
  24. Why are artists good at fishing? They are masters at draw-ing them in.
  25. Why was the painting always cold? It always had a fresh coat.
  26. What do you call an artist who sculpts with fruit? A banana “split-artist.”
  27. Why don’t artists make good runners? Because they always draw a line at running.
  28. Why did the artist break his pencil? He had too many pointed remarks.
  29. Why did the artist fail his driving test? He took the term “paint the town red” too literally.
  30. What did the artist say when his work was finally appreciated? “I’ve made my mark!”
  31. Why are painters always happy? Because they always have an “art” to heart conversation.
  32. Why do artists always carry a pen? They might come across a sketchy situation.
  33. What do you call a painter’s bad day? A “brush” with disaster.
  34. Why did the artist visit the jungle? He wanted to “draw” a lion.
  35. What do you call an artistic cat? A “purr”-trait artist.
  36. Why did the artist bring a ladder? He wanted to reach new heights in his work.
  37. Why are artists good at soccer? They’re great at drawing the line.
  38. Why did the painter stay at the circus? He wanted to sketch a few “clownscapes.”
  39. Why do painters make good drivers? They always stay in their lane.
  40. What does an artist do at a concert? They “draw” inspiration.
  41. Why don’t painters make good criminals? They always leave a “mark.”
  42. Why did the artist go to the beach? He wanted to “draw” some waves.
  43. What’s a painter’s favorite type of clothing? “Easels,” of course.
  44. What’s an artist’s favorite type of music? Sketch-pop.
  45. Why did the painter bring his brushes to the party? He wanted to paint the night away.
  46. Why do painters never get hungry? They always have a palette full of colors.
  47. Why did the painter go to the dentist? He needed a new “brush.”
  48. What’s a painter’s favorite type of dog? A “draw-g.”
  49. Why did the artist visit the zoo? He wanted to draw a “zoo-scape.”
  50. Why did the artist bring a canvas to the restaurant? He wanted to “draw” the waiter.
  51. What’s a painter’s favorite book? “Fifty Shades of Grey,” for its tonal variations.
  52. Why did the artist become a gardener? He wanted to plant “still life.”
  53. Why did the artist go to the casino? He wanted to “draw” a lucky card.
  54. What do you call a painter who only works with shadows? A shady artist.
  55. What’s a painter’s favorite weather? Light drizzle, it makes everything look like a watercolor painting.
  56. Why did the artist go to the farm? He heard it was the best place to “draw” a crowd.
  57. Why did the painter always lose at tic-tac-toe? He always tried to “draw.”
  58. What does a painter do when he’s scared? He “draws” courage.
  59. What’s a painter’s favorite game? “Draw” Something.
  60. Why did the painter bring a ruler to the studio? He wanted to draw a straight line.
  61. Why was the artist never late for work? He always knew the shortest path to “draw.”
  62. What do you call a painter’s child? A little sketch.
  63. Why do artists like playing chess? Because they enjoy the endgame, it’s all about drawing.
  64. Why did the artist never finish his painting? He kept “drawing” a blank.
  65. What’s a painter’s favorite breakfast? Pancakes with a side of “still lifes.”
  66. Why do artists never win at basketball? They can’t help but “draw” fouls.
  67. Why do artists love coffee shops? They’re great for “drawing” people.
  68. Why did the artist bring his brushes to bed? He wanted to “draw” dreams.
  69. Why do artists make poor wrestlers? They’re always afraid to cross the line.
  70. Why do painters hate rush hour? Too many “strokes.”
  71. What do you call a painter’s nightmare? A “brush” with death.
  72. Why did the artist go to the gym? He wanted to “draw” muscle.
  73. What do you call a painter who only works at night? A night “drawer.”
  74. Why did the painter keep a diary? To keep a record of all his strokes of genius.
  75. Why did the artist go to the eye doctor? He was having trouble seeing the big “picture.”
  76. Why did the painter go to space? He wanted to paint a “star-scape.”
  77. Why do artists love the ocean? It gives them a chance to “draw” water.
  78. Why did the painter join the baseball team? He wanted to “draw” a home run.
  79. Why did the artist go to the barber? He wanted to “draw” a beard.
  80. What’s a painter’s favorite dance?The “brush” step.
  81. Why did the painter go to the orchestra? He wanted to “draw” a note.
  82. Why did the artist go to the North Pole? He wanted to sketch a “cool” scene.
  83. Why did the painter bring his brushes to the football game? He was hoping to “draw” a touchdown.
  84. What’s a painter’s favorite drink? “Still-life” water.
  85. Why did the artist visit the tailor? He was always “drawing” seams.
  86. Why did the artist become a carpenter? He wanted to “draw” a table.
  87. Why did the artist carry a compass? He didn’t want to “draw” a circle wrong.
  88. Why do artists make good diplomats? They are great at drawing boundaries.
  89. What’s an artist’s favorite fruit? A “sketch-uari.”
  90. Why did the artist never get married? He couldn’t “draw” a commitment.
  91. Why did the artist start boxing? He wanted to “draw” a punch.
  92. Why did the artist get a job at the bakery? He wanted to “draw” bread.
  93. What’s a painter’s favorite type of shoe? A “canvas” sneaker.
  94. Why did the artist start playing the violin? He wanted to “draw” a tune.
  95. Why did the painter go to the forest? He wanted to “draw” a tree.
  96. What do you call a painter’s workout? A “brush” up exercise.
  97. Why did the artist become a chef? He wanted to “draw” a recipe.
  98. What do you call an artist’s farewell? A “drawn” goodbye.
  99. Why do painters hate being rushed? They can’t handle the “fast strokes.”
  100. Why did the artist start cycling? He wanted to “draw” a route.
  101. What’s a painter’s favorite ride at the amusement park? The “Ferris Wheel,” because they love to draw it.
  102. Why did the artist go to the desert? He wanted to “draw” a cactus.
  103. What’s a painter’s favorite type of car? A “draw”-gster.
  104. Why do painters hate rainy days? They always end up with watercolors.
  105. Why did the artist become a banker? He wanted to “draw” interest.
  106. Why do artists love puzzles? Because it’s all about drawing connections.
  107. What’s a painter’s favorite exercise? The “brush”-up.
  108. Why did the artist go camping? He wanted to “draw” a campfire.
  109. Why did the artist become a gardener? He loved “drawing” flowers.
  110. What’s a painter’s favorite type of tea? “Paints-mint.”
  111. Why do painters hate laundry? It always “blurs” their lines.
  112. Why did the painter visit the tower? He wanted to “draw” height.
  113. Why did the artist start rock climbing? He wanted to “draw” a cliff.
  114. Why did the artist go to the supermarket? He wanted to “draw” a cart.
  115. What’s a painter’s favorite type of pasta? “Penne” and ink.
  116. Why did the artist visit the candy store? He wanted to “draw” a lollipop.
  117. Why did the artist get a pet bird? He wanted to “draw” a feather.
  118. Why do artists love Halloween? Because they can “draw” a scare.
  119. What’s a painter’s favorite type of cheese? “Gouda” color.
  120. Why did the artist visit the jungle gym? He wanted to “draw” a swing.
  121. What’s a painter’s favorite type of map? A “color” chart.
  122. Why did the artist go to the lake? He wanted to “draw” a duck.
  123. Why did the artist start yoga? He wanted to “draw” a pose.
  124. Why did the artist go to the moon? He wanted to “draw” an alien.
  125. What’s a painter’s favorite type of movie? A “sketch” comedy.
  126. Why do artists hate power cuts? It interrupts their “flow.”
  127. Why did the artist join the gym? He wanted to “draw” a six-pack.
  128. What do you call an artist’s favorite dessert? A “sketch-olate” cake.
  129. Why did the artist become an architect? He wanted to “draw” buildings.
  130. Why did the artist start swimming? He wanted to “draw” a splash.
  131. What’s a painter’s favorite type of sandwich? A “brush”-etta.
  132. Why did the artist go to the circus? He wanted to “draw” an elephant.
  133. Why did the artist visit the ice cream parlor? He wanted to “draw” a sundae.
  134. Why did the artist become a photographer? He wanted to “draw” light.
  135. What’s a painter’s favorite type of bird? A “sketch” owl.
  136. Why did the artist visit the pet store? He wanted to “draw” a goldfish.
  137. Why did the artist visit the farm? He wanted to “draw” a pig.
  138. What’s a painter’s favorite type of pizza? A “brush”-etta.
  139. Why did the artist go to the coffee shop? He wanted to “draw” a latte.
  140. Why did the artist visit the aquarium? He wanted to “draw” a shark.
  141. What’s a painter’s favorite type of gemstone? A “sketch”-fire.
  142. Why did the artist visit the hat store? He wanted to “draw” a cap.
  143. Why did the artist visit the theme park? He wanted to “draw” a roller coaster.
  144. What’s a painter’s favorite type of flower? A “brush”-room.
  145. Why did the artist visit the toy store? He wanted to “draw” a teddy bear.
  146. Why did the artist visit the mountain? He wanted to “draw” a peak.
  147. What’s a painter’s favorite type of salad? A “sketch”-arole.
  148. Why did the artist go to the zoo? He wanted to “draw” a monkey.
  149. What’s a painter’s favorite type of cookie? A “sketch”-er doodle.
  150. Why did the artist visit the seashore? He wanted to “draw” a shell.

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