148 McDonald’s jokes
Wow, 150 McDonald’s jokes!
That’s quite a hefty order, but I’ll do my best.
Remember, these jokes are all in good humor and are not meant to offend.
- Why did the hamburger go to school? Because it wanted to get a little bit “saucier”.
- Why did the French fry win the race? Because it knew all the “short cuts”.
- What’s Ronald McDonald’s favorite exercise? The “happy” meal.
- Why don’t they play hide and seek at McDonald’s? Because good luck hiding when you smell like fries!
- Why did the McDonald’s employee get an award? He had outstanding “burger” service.
- Why was the Big Mac so good at baseball? It always hit a “grand slam”.
- What did the McNugget say to the French fry? “You’re fried!”
- Why was the Filet-o-Fish so smart? It always went to “school”.
- Why did the hamburger go to the gym? It wanted to get “beefed up”.
- How does a McDonald’s burger propose? With an “onion ring”.
- Why was the Happy Meal so excited? It had all the “feel-good” factors.
- What did the chicken say to the Big Mac? “Don’t ‘meat’ me!”
- What does a hamburger wear to a wedding? A “bun”-tux.
- How does Ronald McDonald start his day? With a “joe” to go.
- Why did the nugget go to the party? To “chicken” out!
- Why don’t McDonald’s burgers go on vacation? They prefer to be “fast” at home.
- How does McDonald’s make a dog? With a “bark”ode.
- Why do people never fight in McDonald’s? Because it’s a “pattie”-free zone.
- What do you call a nervous burger? A “shake”.
- Why are McDonald’s burgers so noisy? Because they have the “beefs”.
- Why did the burger break up with the French fry? They had a “salty” relationship.
- What do McDonald’s employees do in their free time? “Catch-up” on work.
- Why was the burger at McDonald’s feeling lonely? It was missing its “bun”-companion.
- How do you get a baby burger to sleep? With a “patty-cake” lullaby.
- What’s a McDonald’s burger’s favorite song? “Rolling in the Deep-fryer”.
- Why did the tomato turn red at McDonald’s? Because it saw the salad “dressing”.
- What do McDonald’s employees use to call each other? “Burger-phones”.
- What’s a burger’s favorite type of story? A “beefy” tale.
- What do you call a McDonald’s employee who plays the piano? A “tune-burger”.
- What’s the McDonald’s burger’s secret talent? It can “cut the mustard”.
- Why did the McDonald’s cheeseburger enroll in school? It wanted to become a “grill”-ian.
- How does a McDonald’s burger say goodbye? “Bun voyage!”
- Why did the McDonald’s employee get promoted? They were a “whisk taker”.
- What do you call a fake McDonald’s Burger? An “im-patty-stor”.
- What’s a McDonald’s burger’s favorite movie? “Jurassic Pork”.
- How does a McDonald’s burger meditate? It “relishes” the moment.
- Why did the McDonald’s burger go to therapy? It couldn’t “ketchup” with life.
- What do you call a McDonald’s burger in space? An “astro-nomical” meal.
- How does McDonald’s like their jokes? “Well-done”.
- What does a burger wear to the beach? A “bun-kini”.
- What’s the McDonald’s burger’s favorite hobby? “Grilling” out.
- What does a burger do when it loses its job? It “pickles” up a new one.
- Why did the McDonald’s worker get promoted to baker? Because he was on a “roll”.
- How does a burger do its homework? “Lettuce” think about it.
- What does a burger say in a race? “Ketchup” if you can!
- Why do McDonald’s burgers never lie? They are too “grounded”.
- Why did the nugget go to jail? It was accused of “fowl” play.
- What does a burger say on Valentine’s day? “Lettuce be together”.
- What do you call a cold burger at McDonald’s? A “chilly-cheese” burger.
- Why did the French fry become a detective? It loved “unraveling the truth”.
- Why did the cheeseburger start a blog? It had a lot to “dish” out.
- What is a burger’s dream job? To be a “grill” sergeant.
- What’s a burger’s favorite horror movie? “Fry-day the 13th”.
- Why did the burger join the circus? It was tired of the “daily grind”.
- What do you call a dancing cheeseburger? A “beef” jiver.
- Why did the McNugget go to school? To get a little “peppered” up.
- How does a burger do its hair? With a “comb-beef”!
- What’s a McDonald’s burger’s favorite band? “Meatloaf”.
- Why do burgers make terrible secret agents? They always “spill the beans”.
- Why did the burger visit the psychiatrist? It felt “pressed”.
- How does a McDonald’s burger apologize? “Lettuce make it up to you”.
- Why did the McNugget go to the concert? To see “Chicken” Foot.
- How does a burger propose? “Marry me, and lettuce have a happy meal together”.
- What do you call a burger that can sing? A “bun-tenor”.
- Why do burgers go to the gym? They don’t want to be “fast” food.
- Why was the McDonald’s employee always late? He couldn’t “ketchup” with time.
- Why did the burger refuse to play cards with the fries? It was afraid of “chips”.
- What do you call an artist who works at McDonald’s? A “Patty”-casso.
- What do you call a McDonald’s burger on a trampoline? A “beef” flipper.
- How does a burger win an argument? By having the “last bite”.
- What’s a burger’s favorite type of math? “Algebra” (All-beef-burger).
- Why did the chicken nugget go to the museum? It wanted to see “Hen”-ri Matisse’s work.
- Why did the burger date the French fry? It couldn’t resist its “appeal”.
- Why was the McDonald’s burger so popular? It had lots of “patty”-tude.
- Why was the burger a good actor?It always got the “meatiest” roles.
- What’s a McDonald’s burger’s favorite pastime? “Patty”-cake.
- Why was the McDonald’s employee a good DJ? He always knew when to “flip” the record.
- What’s the burger’s favorite form of travel? “Cruisin’” in a “grill”.
- How does a McDonald’s burger solve its problems? With a little “seasoning”.
- Why did the cheeseburger go to the museum? To see the ancient “grills”.
- What is a McDonald’s burger’s favorite book? “To Grill a Mockingbird”.
- Why don’t burgers ever get promoted? They always have “beef” with their boss.
- What’s the McDonald’s burger’s favorite dance? The “salsa”.
- Why was the burger sad at McDonald’s? Because it felt a little “flattened”.
- Why do burgers make terrible comedians? Their jokes are just too “cheesy”.
- Why did the burger go to the spa? It needed a “relishing” experience.
- What did the Big Mac say to the Quarter Pounder? “Weight for me!”
- What do you call a romantic McDonald’s burger? “Sir-Loin Heart”.
- Why did the burger stop playing the piano? It had too many “scales”.
- How does McDonald’s make their burgers so good? They “mustered” up the secret.
- Why did the burger refuse to play soccer? It was afraid of getting “kicked” around.
- What’s the McDonald’s burger’s favorite place to visit? “Bun” Francisco.
- What does a McDonald’s burger do at a party? It “meats” up with friends.
- What do you call a McDonald’s employee who’s good at math? A “calculator”.
- What did the burger say to its sweetheart? “I’m really “grilled” to have you in my life”.
- How does a McDonald’s employee send a secret message? By using a “code burger”.
- What do you call a scary McDonald’s burger? A “fry-tening” sight.
- Why did the McDonald’s worker become an astronaut? He wanted to see if there were burgers in space.
- What did the burger say to the soda? “You’re “fizz”-ically attractive”.
- Why was the Big Mac so bossy? It always wanted to be “on top”.
- What does a McDonald’s burger say when it’s surprised? “Oh my buns!”
- What’s the McDonald’s burger’s favorite type of music? “Bun”k.
- Why did the burger go to the party? To “ketchup” with friends.
- What is a burger’s favorite sport? “Bun-jump”.
- Why was the McDonald’s employee always tired? He was always “flipping” out.
- Why did the cheeseburger take a nap? It was “beef-tired”.
- What’s a McDonald’s burger’s favorite drink? “Pep-sirloin”.
- What do you call a McDonald’s employee who can play the guitar? A “Rock-n-Roll”.
- Why did the burger go to the doctor? It had a bad “bun-ion”.
- What’s a McDonald’s burger’s favorite TV show? “Game of Buns”.
- Why did the McNugget cross the road? To prove it wasn’t a “chicken”.
- What’s a McDonald’s burger’s favorite game? “Bunopoly”.
- Why did the Big Mac go to the opera? It wanted to see the “bun-tenor”.
- What’s the favorite season of a McDonald’s burger? “Fall” because the leaves are as crispy as the fries.
- Why was the burger so well-behaved? It had good “bunners”.
- What do you call a McDonald’s worker with a sunburn? A “burger flipper”.
- What is a burger’s favorite day of the week? “Fry”-day.
- What did the fries say to the burger? “I’m your biggest “fan”-fry”.
- Why did the McDonald’s burger go to the dentist? It had a “cavity-filling”.
- What does a burger wear to a job interview? A “tux-bun”.
- Why did the burger blush? It saw the salad “dressing”.
- How do you compliment a burger? “You’re looking “bun”-tastic today!”
- What’s a McDonald’s burger’s favorite instrument? The “drum(stick)”.
- What did the Big Mac say to the Quarter Pounder? “I’m “bun”-derfully bigger”.
- Why don’t burgers like to play basketball? They’re afraid of the “bun-net”.
- What’s the McDonald’s burger’s favorite planet? “Mars”hmallow.
- Why did the burger go to the football game? It wanted to join the “grill” team.
- Why was the burger good at chess? It was always “two steps a-bun”.
- How does a McDonald’s burger stay in shape? It goes for a “run-bun”.
- What’s a burger’s favorite dance move? The “bun”ny hop.
- Why did the McDonald’s burger go to Hollywood? It wanted to get a “taste” of fame.
- Why don’t McDonald’s burgers go on roller coasters? They might “flip” out.
- What do you call a McDonald’s employee in winter? A “snow-bun-dler”.
- Why did the burger win the lottery? It was a “sizzling” luck.
- Why did the burger visit its grandpa? It wanted to hear “beefy” stories.
- How does a McDonald’s burger feel after a long day? “Grilled” out.
- What’s a burger’s favorite exercise? “Bun”-damentals.
- Why was the McDonald’s employee a good gardener? He was good at “weeding” out the bad ones.
- Why did the McDonald’s burger go to yoga? To work on its “bun-dhasana”.
- Why do burgers make poor detectives? They always “grill” the wrong person.
- What’s a burger’s favorite type of party? A “barbe-cue”.
- Why did the McDonald’s burger go to a karaoke bar? It wanted to sing “beef”-flat.
- What’s a McDonald’s burger’s favorite cartoon character? “Bun”-ny the vampire slayer.
- Why did the burger break up with the shake? They were in a “blend” relationship.
- What’s a burger’s favorite magic trick? The “bun-nishing” act.
- Why was the McDonald’s burger in the library? It was “relishing” a good book.
- Why did the McDonald’s worker bring a ladder to work? He wanted to “reach” the top.
- What’s a burger’s favorite color? “Burgundy”.