57+ data jokes
- Why don’t data scientists get sunburns? Because they always use layers of protection!
- What did the data say to its lover? I find your lack of ‘nulls’ very attractive.
- Why did the computer keep its data to itself? It had trust issues.
- Why did the dataset go to the doctor? It had bad circulation.
- How did the database propose to its love? “Will you SQL me?”
- What did the database say to the query? “Stop asking me questions!”
- Why did the data table go to therapy? It had too many relationships.
- What did the spreadsheet say to the cell? “You add value to my life.”
- Why don’t databases make good sailors? They can’t handle the views.
- Why was the data scientist late for work? Because he took the scenic route.
- What does a data analyst use to spice up their salad? A pie chart.
- Why did the big data cross the road? To prove it could predict the chicken.
- Why did the data get drunk? It couldn’t handle another byte.
- What’s a data scientist’s favorite animal? A Python.
- Why don’t data scientists go on dates? They prefer to normalize relations.
- Why was the data scientist worried? He had a case of the ‘nulls’.
- How does a data scientist comfort their friends? “There, there. It’s just a phase.”
- How does a database propose? It just drops the question.
- How do data scientists seduce? They use the ‘Natural Language Processing’.
- Why was the data scientist kicked out of school? Because he couldn’t follow the principal component.
- Why do data scientists use Python? Because it’s a sssssuperb language.
- Why was the data scientist a bad comedian? His jokes had too many layers.
- Why did the data set break up with its partner? It was fed up with all the clustering.
- What did the database say to its girlfriend? “You auto-complete me.”
- Why don’t databases go fishing? They can’t handle the hooks.
- What did the dataset say to the machine learning model? “You make me feel special.”
- Why was the spreadsheet always happy? It always found its functions.
- What did the database administrator get for Christmas? A Jo-in toy.
- What did the data say to the algorithm? “You’re so predictable!”
- What is a data scientist’s favorite dance? The algorithm.
- Why do data scientists love zoos? They’re wild about classification.
- What did the data analyst say to his boss? “You’re statistically significant!”
- Why was the data scientist’s report so thin? He used too much compression.
- Why did the dataset go to the salon? It wanted a new histogram.
- What did the data scientist’s tattoo say? “Live, love, loop.”
- Why did the data get arrested? It was a repeat offender.
- What’s a data scientist’s favorite kind of tree? A decision tree.
- Why did the graph go to a party? Because it wanted to be a bar chart.
- What did the database say to the firewall? “You’re making me feel secure.”
- What does a data scientist say when they are feeling lazy? “Let’s automate this.”
- Why did the data analyst bring a ladder to work? To reach the higher-order functions.
- What do data scientists do when they are nervous? They break into arrays.
- Why was the data point feeling down? It had low self-esteem.
- Why did the data model break up with the data scientist? Because it felt overfitted.
- Why don’t data scientists play hide and seek? Because good luck hiding when they always find the patterns.
- Why did the data scientist go to the party alone? Because he always has a couple of regressions.
- What’s a data scientist’s favorite drink? A ‘mean’ martini.
- What do data scientists and pirates have in common? They both treasure R.
- Why was the database feeling bloated? Too much junk in its table.
- What is a data scientist’s favorite part of a song? The frequency.
- Why was the data scientist good at poker? He could predict the hands.
- Why don’t data scientists make good bakers? They always normalize the dough.
- What did the data say at its retirement party? “I’m out of your range now!”
- What did the data scientist say to the confused data? “Let me clarify things with a little cleaning.”
- What does a data scientist wear to a meeting? A suite of algorithms.
- Why did the data analyst get a promotion? He was always on point.
- What’s a data scientist’s favorite pick-up line? “Are you a 95% confidence interval? Because I’m feeling a significant attraction.”
- Why did the data model go to the psychiatrist? It had identity issues.
- What is a data scientist’s favorite music genre? Deep Learning House.
- Why did the data scientist bring a compass to work? To navigate the data ocean.
- What did the left data say to the right data? “You’re out of my scope.”
- Why did the data scientist go broke? He gambled on the wrong prediction.
- What is a data scientist’s favorite horror movie? “The Null in the Wall.”
- What did the database administrator say to the query? “You’ve got too many joins.”
- Why was the data scientist always losing at chess? He kept losing his Rooks.
- What’s a data scientist’s favorite place to visit? The cloud.
- What do you call a single piece of data? A datum romantic.
- Why did the data file go to the police station? It was a victim of identity theft.
- Why did the data analyst go to the art museum? To appreciate the pie charts.
- How does a data analyst talk to a ghost? They use Boo-lean logic.
- Why did the dataset see a psychologist? It had too many outliers.
- How does a data scientist cure a cold? With a data flu-ence shot.
- Why don’t data scientists have a favorite color? They prefer a spectrum.
- Why did the database get in trouble at school? It had a bad attitude (latitude and longitude).
- What is a data analyst’s favorite book? “Gone with the Wind-ows.”
- Why did the data file wear glasses? It had poor vision.
- Why was the data scientist bad at soccer? He was a terrible keeper.
- What’s a data analyst’s favorite flower? The Iris dataset.
- What did the data say to the analyst after a long day? “You ‘Excel’ at your job.”
- What do data scientists and spies have in common? Both are masters at decoding.
- Why did the data scientist’s dinner taste so bad? He got the salt and hashing functions mixed up.
- How do data scientists keep fit? They run Python scripts.
- Why did the data analyst get a dog? He wanted a best ‘fetcher’.
- What’s a data scientist’s favorite dessert? Pi-chart.
- What’s a data scientist’s favorite hotel? The Kernel Inn.
- Why did the data analyst go to the party? He heard there would be a lot of ‘mixing’.
- What did the data file say to its friend? “Can you keep a secret? I’ve got encryption.”
- What do data analysts use to light their homes? Lamp stack.
- What’s a data scientist’s favorite day of the week? Mon-dataset.
- What do you call a funny data analyst? A spreadsheet comedian.
- Why did the data break up with its partner? They were not on the same page.
- Why did the data scientist start working out? To reduce the bias.
- Why was the database sad? Because its data was corrupted.
- Why don’t data scientists play poker? They don’t like dealing with suits.
- Why do data scientists rarely fight? They always avoid conflicts.
- What did the dataset say to the data scientist? “You make my variables fluctuate.”
- Why was the data scientist a terrible farmer? He kept pulling up the roots to see if the plants were growing.
- Why did the data analyst join the circus? He loved juggling data.
- What is a data scientist’s favorite type of dog? A Boxer-Plot.
- Why did the computer keep its data in the freezer? It wanted to freeze the frame.
- Why did the data scientist become a DJ? He loved to drop the base(line).
- Why do data scientists make terrible gardeners? They’re always trying to prune the trees.
- What did the SQL database say to the NoSQL database? “Stop trying to table the relationship.”
- What’s a data scientist’s favorite type of pants? The ones with deep pockets (for deep learning).
- What did the data scientist say to the lost data? “I’ll never forget you.”
- What do data analysts wear to the beach? Flip-flop bits.
- Why was the data scientist so good at meditation? He could easily find his inner join.
- What’s a data scientist’s favorite type of party? A LAN party.
- Why did the data scientist take the job at the bakery? He loved the dough (data).
- Why did the data go to the gym? It wanted to be in the best shape.
- Why was the data scientist bad at basketball? He always missed the point.
- What’s a data scientist’s favorite chess piece? The Rook, of course!
- Why don’t data analysts like analog clocks? They prefer digital.
- What did the data scientist say after a long day? “It’s time to take a break(point).”
- What do you call a collection of data scientists? An array of nerds.
- What did the data scientist get his wife for their anniversary? A diamond (data-mining) ring.
- Why was the data scientist a bad driver? He always took the long (data) path.
- Why did the data file feel sick? It had a virus.
- Why did the data scientist go to the concert? He heard there were a lot of bands (width).
- Why did the data get deleted? It was found guilty of fraud.
- Why did the data scientist go to the stadium? He wanted to see a match.
- What’s a data scientist’s favorite exercise? The data lift.
- Why did the data analyst become a chef? He was good at slicing and dicing data.
- Why did the data file refuse to play the music? It didn’t want to face the music.
- What is a data scientist’s favorite snack? Chips and bits.
- Why did the data scientist get a cat? He was bored with mouse tracking.
- What do data analysts and DJs have in common? They both know how to drop the beat (baseline).
- Why don’t data scientists drink tap water? They prefer streaming.
- What is a data scientist’s favorite game? Hide and SQL.
- Why did the data scientist go to the circus? He wanted to see the high-dimensional act.
- Why did the data analyst bring an umbrella to work? Because of the predicted showers.
- Why was the data file happy on its birthday? It was the center of a-ten-tion.
- What do data scientists and wizards have in common? They both know how to cast spells (in R and Python).
- Why did the data scientist visit the farm? To check the kernel.
- What is a data scientist’s favorite bird? The Twitter bird, it generates the most data.
- Why don’t data scientists sleep well? Because they have nightmares about overfitting.
- What did the data analyst get on his birthday? A data cake with a cherry (pick) on top.
- What’s a data scientist’s favorite vacation destination? The Bay(es) Area.
- Why was the data analyst good at golf? He always hit the mark.
- What’s a data scientist’s favorite type of coffee? Java.
- Why did the data analyst go to the jungle? He wanted to see the Python.
- What is a data scientist’s favorite movie? “A Beautiful Mind(set).”
- Why did the data scientist go to the beach? He wanted to surf the web.
- What did the data scientist wear to the fancy party? A bow (tie) chart.
- Why did the data scientist visit the orchestra? He was interested in conducting.
- Why did the data scientist go to the zoo? He wanted to see the pandas (in Python).
- What do you call a data scientist who makes pottery? A data moulder.
- What’s a data scientist’s favorite type of music? Anything with a good algorithm.
- What’s a data scientist’s favorite card game? Pinochle, because it’s all about the numbers.
- What’s a data scientist’s favorite candy? A bit-o-honey.