150 yoda jokes

  1. Why did Yoda refuse to upgrade to the 4K version of Star Wars? Because, “HD, unnecessary it is. Feel the force, one must.”
  2. What kind of car does Yoda drive? A ToYoda.
  3. Why was Yoda such a good gardener? Because he always had green thumbs, he did.
  4. Why does Yoda never get locked out of his house? Because, always his keys with him, he keeps.
  5. What’s Yoda’s favorite dessert? Choco-chip wookiee.
  6. Why doesn’t Yoda ever tell secrets? Because, carry tales, a Jedi does not.
  7. What kind of music does Yoda listen to? Yodal.
  8. Why was Yoda a bad baseball coach? Because, in the right field, no one he could put.
  9. Why doesn’t Yoda play poker in the savanna? Afraid of cheetahs, he is.
  10. How did Yoda propose? “The one for me, you are. Marry me, will you?”
  11. Why doesn’t Yoda use GPS? Because, the Force guides him.
  12. Why can’t Yoda be a lifeguard? Because, everyone out of the pool he keeps pulling.
  13. Why doesn’t Yoda tell dad jokes? Because, a father, he is not.
  14. Why is Yoda bad at soccer? Because, always trying to use the force, he is.
  15. Why did Yoda refuse to join the dark side? Because, not a fan of dark chocolate, he is.
  16. What’s Yoda’s favorite exercise? Yoga, it is.
  17. Why doesn’t Yoda get stressed? Because, always at peace, he is.
  18. What’s Yoda’s favorite day of the week? SaturYoda.
  19. Why is Yoda a good cook? Because, stir with the Force, he does.
  20. What’s Yoda’s favorite drink? The “Yoda Soda.”
  21. Why doesn’t Yoda like shopping online? Because, touch the goods first, he must.
  22. Why is Yoda a bad mechanic? Because, levitate the car instead of fixing it, he does.
  23. Why doesn’t Yoda get sunburn? Because, the forcefield protects him.
  24. What’s Yoda’s favorite part of a song? The coda, it is.
  25. What does Yoda say to encourage his students? “Do, or do not. A try, there is not.”
  26. Why is Yoda bad at playing hide and seek? Because, always sense where he is, one can.
  27. What’s Yoda’s favorite fish? The Haddock, it is.
  28. Why is Yoda a good philosopher? Because, ponder the force, he does.
  29. Why is Yoda a bad chess player? Because, move all pieces at once, he does.
  30. Why doesn’t Yoda use umbrellas? Because, stop the rain with the Force, he can.
  31. What did Yoda say when he watched a funny movie? “Hmm, funny it is.”
  32. What’s Yoda’s favorite dance? The Yoda-le-he-hoo.
  33. Why can’t Yoda keep a secret? Because, sense the truth, others can.
  34. Why can’t Yoda use a smartphone? Because, always on airplane mode, he is.
  35. What’s Yoda’s favorite fruit? Kiwi, it is. Small and green like me, it is.
  36. Why doesn’t Yoda use a laptop? Because, use the force to search the internet, he does.
  37. Why is Yoda bad at Monopoly? Because, invest in properties, he does not.
  38. Why is Yoda a bad DJ? Because, in the wrong order, the tracks he plays.
  39. Why doesn’t Yoda watch horror movies? Because, foresee the jump scares, he can.
  40. Why does Yoda always carry a stick? Because, lean on the Force, he does.
  41. What’s Yoda’s favorite soda? Mountain Dew, it is.
  42. Why can’t Yoda play basketball? Because, use the Force to dunk, he would.
  43. Why doesn’t Yoda use a flashlight? Because, glow in the dark, he does.
  44. Why doesn’t Yoda play cards in the jungle? Because, of cheetahs, he is afraid.
  45. What’s Yoda’s favorite clothing brand? Levis, it is.
  46. Why does Yoda never get lost? Because, the Force guides him, it does.
  47. Why does Yoda always arrive early? Because, late, a Jedi is never.
  48. What’s Yoda’s favorite TV show? “The Big Bang TheorYoda.”
  49. Why is Yoda a bad fisherman? Because, levitate the fish out of the water, he does.
  50. What’s Yoda’s favorite song? “It’s a Wonderful World, it is.”
  51. What did Yoda say when he first saw himself in 4K? “Hmm, HD unnecessary it is.”
  52. What’s Yoda’s favorite sport? Soccer it is. Kick, I can.
  53. Why doesn’t Yoda ever need a map? Because, follow the force, he does.
  54. Why does Yoda make a bad real estate agent? Because, see the future of the market, he cannot.
  55. What’s Yoda’s favorite shoe brand? Adidas it is. All day I dream about the Force.
  56. Why doesn’t Yoda use a computer? Because, write in the clouds, he can.
  57. Why is Yoda a terrible waiter? Because, levitate the food to the tables, he does.
  58. Why does Yoda make a good teacher? Because, make complicated things simple, he can.
  59. Why is Yoda bad at golf? Because, levitate the ball into the hole, he does.
  60. Why does Yoda never play hide-and-seek? Because, always find him, you will.
  61. What’s Yoda’s favorite sandwich? Ham Solo.
  62. Why is Yoda a terrible chef? Because, stir everything with the Force, he does.
  63. Why does Yoda make a good fitness coach? Because, use the force to lift weights, he does.
  64. Why is Yoda a bad painter? Because, paint with the Force, he does.
  65. What’s Yoda’s favorite restaurant? “Taco Bell, it is.”
  66. What is Yoda’s advice to stress eaters? “Eat not when feelings you have.”
  67. Why can’t Yoda keep a diary? Because, read it with the Force, others can.
  68. What’s Yoda’s favorite band? The Beetles, it is.
  69. Why does Yoda make a bad basketball coach? Because, use the Force to score, he would.
  70. What’s Yoda’s favorite flower? The Daisies, they are.
  71. Why is Yoda a bad politician? Because, compromise, he does not.
  72. Why does Yoda make a good life coach? Because, the Force he uses to guide others.
  73. Why is Yoda a bad surgeon? Because, use the Force to perform surgery, he does.
  74. Why can’t Yoda use the Internet? Because, already connected to the universe, he is.
  75. Why is Yoda a terrible comedian? Because, deliver the punchline first, he does.
  76. Why does Yoda never lose at tic-tac-toe? Because, three in a row, he sees.
  77. What’s Yoda’s favorite weather? Cloudy with a chance of the Force.
  78. Why can’t Yoda write a novel? Because, backwards all the sentences would be.
  79. What’s Yoda’s favorite board game? Life it is. Live it, I do.
  80. Why does Yoda make a bad drummer? Because, hit the cymbals with the Force, he does.
  81. What’s Yoda’s favorite candy? Life Savers.
  82. Why doesn’t Yoda play darts? Because, hit the bullseye with the Force, he does.
  83. What is Yoda’s favorite poem? “The Road Not Taken, it is.”
  84. Why does Yoda make a bad tennis player? Because, serve with the Force, he does.
  85. What’s Yoda’s favorite winter activity? Ice-skate, it is.
  86. Why can’t Yoda play poker? Because, see everyone’s hand, he can.
  87. What’s Yoda’s favorite pet? The dogs, they are.
  88. Why is Yoda a bad magician? Because, reveal his secrets, the Force does.
  89. What’s Yoda’s favorite movie? “E.T., it is. Home, he also wants to phone.”
  90. Why does Yoda make a bad librarian? Because, return the books before reading them, he does.
  91. What’s Yoda’s favorite rock band? “The Rolling Stones, it is.”
  92. Why can’t Yoda go bowling? Because, strike with the Force, he does.
  93. What’s Yoda’s favorite type of cheese? “Gouda, it is.”
  94. Why is Yoda a bad mechanic? Because, fix cars with the Force, he does.
  95. What’s Yoda’s favorite book? “War and Peace, it is.”
  96. Why does Yoda make a bad artist? Because, paint with the Force, he does.
  97. What’s Yoda’s favorite ice cream flavor? “Mint Chocolate Chip, it is.”
  98. Why does Yoda make a bad bartender? Because, mix drinks with the Force, he does.
  99. What’s Yoda’s favorite pastime? “Meditation, it is.”
  100. Why is Yoda a bad gardener? Because, grow plants with the Force, he does.
  101. What’s Yoda’s favorite vegetable? “Green beans, they are.”
  102. Why can’t Yoda play chess? Because, move pieces with the Force, he does.
  103. What’s Yoda’s favorite bird? “The dove, it is.”
  104. Why is Yoda a bad baker? Because, bake with the Force, he does.
  105. What’s Yoda’s favorite pizza? “Extra cheese, it is.”
  106. Why is Yoda a bad driver? Because, steer with the Force, he does.
  107. What’s Yoda’s favorite drink? “Green tea, it is.”
  108. Why is Yoda a bad sculptor? Because, sculpt with the Force, he does.
  109. What’s Yoda’s favorite soup? “Pea soup, it is.”
  110. Why can’t Yoda play billiards? Because, pocket balls with the Force, he does.
  111. What’s Yoda’s favorite tea? “Earl Grey, it is.”
  112. Why is Yoda a bad archer? Because, aim with the Force, he does.
  113. What’s Yoda’s favorite pasta? “Penne, it is.”
  114. Why is Yoda a bad accountant? Because, calculate with the Force, he does.
  115. What’s Yoda’s favorite city? “New York, it is.”
  116. Why is Yoda a bad builder? Because, build with the Force, he does.
  117. What’s Yoda’s favorite chocolate? “Mint dark chocolate, it is.”
  118. Why can’t Yoda play the stock market? Because, predict with the Force, he does.
  119. What’s Yoda’s favorite sport? “Cricket, it is.”
  120. Why can’t Yoda be a detective? Because, solve cases with the Force, he does.
  121. What’s Yoda’s favorite fruit? “Apples, they are.”
  122. Why is Yoda a bad photographer? Because, capture with the Force, he does.
  123. What’s Yoda’s favorite tree? “Willow, it is.”
  124. Why can’t Yoda play snooker? Because, pocket balls with the Force, he does.
  125. What’s Yoda’s favorite gemstone? “Emerald, it is.”
  126. Why can’t Yoda be a pilot? Because, fly with the Force, he does.
  127. What’s Yoda’s favorite season? “Spring, it is.”
  128. Why can’t Yoda be a blacksmith? Because, shape metal with the Force, he does.
  129. What’s Yoda’s favorite country? “Ireland, it is.”
  130. Why can’t Yoda be a sailor? Because, sail with the Force, he does.
  131. What’s Yoda’s favorite fish? “Tuna, it is.”
  132. Why can’t Yoda play ping pong? Because, return balls with the Force, he does.
  133. What’s Yoda’s favorite breakfast? “Green eggs and ham, it is.”
  134. Why can’t Yoda play a musical instrument? Because, play with the Force, he does.
  135. What’s Yoda’s favorite insect? “Grasshopper, it is.”
  136. Why can’t Yoda be a carpenter? Because, shape wood with the Force, he does.
  137. What’s Yoda’s favorite constellation? “Orion, it is.”
  138. Why can’t Yoda be a locksmith? Because, unlock with the Force, he does.
  139. What’s Yoda’s favorite sandwich? “BLT, it is.”
  140. Why can’t Yoda play volleyball? Because, serve with the Force, he does.
  141. What’s Yoda’s favorite sea creature? “Dolphin, it is.”
  142. Why can’t Yoda be a sailor? Because, steer with the Force, he does.
  143. What’s Yoda’s favorite cake? “Chocolate, it is.”
  144. Why can’t Yoda be a boxer? Because, punch with the Force, he does.
  145. What’s Yoda’s favorite day of the year? “His birthday, it is.”
  146. Why can’t Yoda be a singer? Because, sing with the Force, he does.
  147. What’s Yoda’s favorite snack? “Popcorn, it is.”
  148. Why can’t Yoda be a cobbler? Because, mend shoes with the Force, he does.
  149. What’s Yoda’s favorite plant? “Fern, it is.”
  150. Why can’t Yoda be a tailor? Because, sew with the Force, he does.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *