57+ wizard jokes
- Why don’t wizards ever go bald? Because they always have a few tricks up their hair!
- Why did the wizard carry a calendar? Because he had a lot of dates with destiny.
- What’s a wizard’s favorite part of a song? The spell-ing chorus!
- Why don’t wizards use pens? Because they’re afraid they might draw the wrong conclusion.
- Why did the wizard always carry an umbrella? Because he knew there was a slight chance of spell.
- Why did the wizard go to school? He had a thirst for ‘k’nowledge!
- Why did the wizard become a gardener? He had a knack for weed-ing out problems!
- What do you call a wizard who only uses fire spells? A light magician!
- Why did the wizard refuse to play cards? He was afraid of dealing with a bad hand.
- Why was the wizard bad at cooking? Because he always burnt his spells!
- Why did the wizard always write in code? He didn’t want anyone to spell-check his work!
- What’s a wizard’s favorite type of dog? A Labracadabrador!
- Why did the wizard go to the beach? He wanted to practice his sand-witch-craft.
- What did the wizard say to his broom? “You sweep me off my feet!”
- Why did the wizard carry a ladder? Because he always wanted to take things to the next level!
- Why was the wizard’s computer so fast? It had a spell-check processor.
- Why did the wizard refuse to eat the alphabet soup? He didn’t want to consume his own words.
- Why did the wizard’s phone always have reception? Because he always had a good spell signal!
- What did the wizard say when he made a mistake in his potion? “I’ve botched the brew, haven’t I?”
- What does a wizard do in his free time? He casts away his troubles!
- What’s a wizard’s favorite place to eat? At the spell-et bar!
- What’s a wizard’s favorite dance? The magic boogie!
- Why do wizards make terrible secret keepers? Because they can’t help but spill the beans… and the potions!
- Why are wizards terrible at Hide and Seek? They always leave a trail of magic dust!
- Why did the wizard never get locked out of his house? He always had the right key-stone!
- Why did the wizard’s plant always grow? Because he watered it with his watering ‘can-trip’!
- What did the wizard say to the calendar? “Your days are numbered!”
- Why do wizards make bad comedians? Because they always ‘spell’ the punchline!
- What’s a wizard’s favorite workout? Spell-ates!
- Why do wizards always win at chess? They know all the knight’s moves!
- What do you call a wizard who can play the guitar? A rock-n-roll sorcerer!
- Why are wizards bad at cooking? They can’t handle the heat in the kitchen… or the fireballs!
- Why did the wizard bring a light bulb to the party? Because he wanted to light up the room!
- Why did the wizard never get lost? He always had a compass spell handy!
- Why did the wizard refuse to play football? He said it was too much of a kicking spell!
- Why do wizards always carry a wand? They can’t handle life without a little magic!
- Why don’t wizards use doorbells? They prefer to ‘knock-knock’ with their wands!
- Why did the wizard visit the desert? He wanted to meet the sand-witches!
- Why are wizards great at baseball? They always know what’s coming in the crystal ‘ball’!
- Why did the wizard bring a map to the party? He didn’t want to get lost in the crowd!
- What do you call a wizard who only uses ice spells? A cool magician!
- Why did the wizard never get tired? He had plenty of rest-orative spells!
- Why did the wizard love to read? He enjoyed getting lost in the pages of a ‘spell’book!
- Why don’t wizards use bookmarks? Because they prefer to memorize the page ‘numbers’!
- Why did the wizard’s diet consist of alphabet soup? Because he wanted to eat his words!
- Why did the wizard always play the lottery? Because he was feeling lucky!
- Why was the wizard always late? He couldn’t find the right ‘time’ spell!
- Why do wizards make terrible thieves? They always leave a magical trace!
- What did the wizard say to his apprentice? “You have a lot to ‘incant’ up to!”
- Why do wizards love riddles? Because they have the answer to everything!
- What do you call a wizard with a cold? A s’not-cerer!
- Why do wizards never run out of words? They always have a spell for that!
- Why are wizards the best musicians? They always ‘note’ the right tune!
- What’s a wizard’s favorite type of clothing? Robe-s!
- What do you call a wizard who only uses wind spells? A breeze magician!
- Why was the wizard’s joke so funny? It had a great punchline and ‘spell’ing!
- Why did the wizard never forget anything? He had a photographic ‘spell’ memory!
- Why did the wizard keep hitting the replay button? He loved the sound of magic!
- What’s a wizard’s favorite dessert? Choco-‘spell’-ing bee!
- What do you call a wizard with no magic? A mere illusionist!
- Why do wizards make terrible lawyers? They can’t resist the urge to ‘spell’ out the truth!
- Why are wizards always calm? They always keep their cool under ‘spell’.
- What did the wizard say to his alarm clock? “Time to make some magic!”
- Why was the wizard always positive? Because he knew there’s no use crying over ‘spell’ milk!
- What’s a wizard’s favorite type of tea? ‘Spell’-grey!
- Why did the wizard go to the moon? He wanted to try some space magic!
- What do you call a wizard in a traffic jam? An enraged magician!
- Why are wizards good at basketball? They always have a ‘shot’ at the goal!
- Why do wizards hate vacuum cleaners? They suck the magic out of everything!
- Why was the wizard always fair? He played by the book… of spells!
- Why did the wizard go to the gym? He wanted to lift his ‘spirits’!
- What’s a wizard’s favorite vegetable? ‘Spell’ery!
- What’s a wizard’s favorite fruit? ‘Spell’berries!
- Why did the wizard never win at poker? His face was always ‘read’.
- Why did the wizard always have money? Because his pockets were full of ‘gold’ spells!
- Why do wizards make good detectives? They always have a clue!
- What did the wizard say to his beer? “You’re brew-tiful!”
- Why did the wizard never get married? He was afraid of committing to a binding spell!
- Why do wizards never go on diet? They prefer to ‘waist’ away their magic!
- Why did the wizard always carry a mirror? He loved to reflect on his spells!
- Why did the wizard refuse to play soccer? He didn’t like being on the receiving end of kicks!
- Why did the wizard go to the bakery? He wanted a taste of the ‘roll’ing magic!
- Why do wizards always write in cursive? They love the spell of it!
- Why did the wizard wear glasses? To help him see the magic!
- Why do wizards make good authors? They always have a spell for writer’s block!
- Why did the wizard always carry a fan? He loved to be ‘blown’ away!
- Why are wizards so good at Math? They always count on their spells!
- Why did the wizard always carry a stopwatch? He liked to time his spells!
- What do you call a wizard who can swim? A deep-sea sorcerer!
- Why did the wizard wear a watch? To keep track of his ‘time’ spells!
- Why do wizards always carry a flashlight? They like to shine in their magic!
- Why do wizards make good teachers? They never run out of ‘lessons’!
- Why did the wizard always carry a dictionary? He didn’t want to misspell anything!
- Why did the wizard always carry a compass? He never liked to lose his ‘direction’!
- Why did the wizard wear a helmet? To ‘guard’ his thoughts!
- Why did the wizard always wear gloves? To get a better ‘grip’ on his spells!
- What do you call a wizard who’s good at jumping? A hop-sorcerer!
- Why did the wizard always have a towel? He liked to keep his magic ‘dry’!
- Why did the wizard always carry a notepad? To jot down his spell ‘ideas’!
- Why did the wizard always have a clean house? He had a ‘sweeping’ spell!
- What do you call a wizard who’s always tired? A yawn-sorcerer!
- Why did the wizard always wear a cape? He liked to keep his magic ‘covered’!
- Why did the wizard always have a smile? He had a ‘cheerful’ spell!
- Why did the wizard never lose a fight? He had a ‘winning’ spell!
- What do you call a wizard who only uses earth spells? A grounded magician!
- Why did the wizard go to the art museum? He wanted to see the ‘picture’ spells!
- Why did the wizard always carry a whistle? He liked to ‘call’ his spells!
- Why did the wizard always have a cat? He needed a ‘purr-fect’ companion!
- Why did the wizard always have a ruler? He liked to ‘measure’ his spells!
- Why did the wizard always have a comb? He liked to keep his magic ‘tidy’!
- What do you call a wizard who’s good at boxing? A punch-sorcerer!
- Why did the wizard always wear socks? To keep his magic ‘warm’!
- Why did the wizard never get surprised? He had a ‘predicting’ spell!
- Why did the wizard always carry a handkerchief? He liked to ‘wipe’ his magic!
- Why did the wizard always have a coin? He liked to ‘flip’ his spells!
- Why did the wizard always wear a backpack? He liked to ‘carry’ his magic!
- What do you call a wizard who’s always late? A slow-sorcerer!
- Why did the wizard always carry a bottle? He liked to ‘pour’ his magic!
- Why did the wizard always have a bell? He liked to ‘ring’ his spells!
- Why did the wizard always wear a scarf? To keep his magic ‘snug’!
- What do you call a wizard who’s good at running? A sprint-sorcerer!
- Why did the wizard always wear boots? To ‘stomp’ his magic!
- Why did the wizard always carry a book? He liked to ‘read’ his spells!
- Why did the wizard always have a clock? He liked to ‘tick’ his magic!
- What do you call a wizard who’s good at singing? A song-sorcerer!
- Why did the wizard always wear a hat? To ‘top’ his magic!
- Why did the wizard always have a camera? He liked to ‘snap’ his spells!
- Why did the wizard always carry a basket? He liked to ‘collect’ his magic!
- What do you call a wizard who’s always calm? A serene-sorcerer!
- Why did the wizard always wear a tie? To ‘knot’ his magic!
- Why did the wizard always have a hammer? He liked to ‘nail’ his spells!
- Why did the wizard always wear a mask? To ‘hide’ his magic!
- Why did the wizard always carry a stick? He liked to ‘point’ his spells!
- Why did the wizard always have a spoon? He liked to ‘stir’ his magic!
- What do you call a wizard who’s always happy? A joy-sorcerer!
- Why did the wizard always wear a belt? To ‘hold’ his magic!
- Why did the wizard always have a pencil? He liked to ‘draw’ his spells!
- Why did the wizard always carry a purse? He liked to ‘bag’ his magic!
- What do you call a wizard who’s always sad? A gloom-sorcerer!
- Why did the wizard always wear earrings? To ‘dangle’ his magic!
- Why did the wizard always have a fork? He liked to ‘pierce’ his spells!
- Why did the wizard always carry a wallet? He liked to ‘cash’ his magic!
- What do you call a wizard who’s always quiet? A mute-sorcerer!
- Why did the wizard always wear glasses? To ‘see’ his magic!
- Why did the wizard always have a key? He liked to ‘unlock’ his spells!
- Why did the wizard always carry a pillow? He liked to ‘soften’ his magic!
- What do you call a wizard who’s always kind? A kind-sorcerer!
- Why did the wizard always wear a wristwatch? To ‘time’ his magic!
- Why did the wizard always have a cup? He liked to ‘fill’ his spells!
- Why did the wizard always carry a flag? He liked to ‘wave’ his magic!