150 social media jokes

  1. Why don’t Facebook users go to heaven? Because they already think they’re in a better place!
  2. Instagram is just Twitter for people who go outside.
  3. Why did the computer go to therapy? It had too many Windows open.
  4. Why don’t secrets work on the internet? Because even your Wi-Fi knows what’s going on.
  5. What is a spider’s favorite thing about the computer? The web.
  6. What do you call a fast internet connection at a coffee shop? An expresso.
  7. Why did the smartphone go to school? Because it lost its class.
  8. Why are computers so smart? Because they listen to their motherboard.
  9. I’d tell you a joke about UDP… but you might not get it.
  10. How do you know if you’re in love, stressed, or hungry? Check Instagram, Twitter, and Pinterest.
  11. What is a social media influencer’s favorite exercise? The “scroll.”
  12. What’s a social media expert’s favorite track event? The Twitter sprint.
  13. Why did the Instagram user go broke? Because he couldn’t stop following the money!
  14. How can you tell if a vampire has a social media account? From all the bite-sized posts!
  15. Why did the Twitter user go to the doctor? He had a tweetment.
  16. How do you know if a picture is art? If it’s framed in an Instagram square.
  17. Why did the computer break up with the internet? There was too much history.
  18. Why was the social media manager stressed? They couldn’t handle the feed.
  19. Why did the computer get glasses? To improve its web sight.
  20. How do you know a cat uses the internet? When it starts purring in code.
  21. Why did the hashtag go to jail? Because it was trending.
  22. What did the Facebook page say to the Instagram account? “Stop stealing my status!”
  23. Why did the computer apply sunscreen? To prevent Windows from burning!
  24. What’s a social media addict’s favorite kind of joke? An inside tweet.
  25. Why don’t computers sleep? Because they don’t want to crash.
  26. Why was the computer cold at work? It left Windows open.
  27. How does a computer get drunk? It takes screenshots.
  28. Why did the computer go to the doctor? It had a bad virus.
  29. What did the smartphone say to the Wifi? We have a connection.
  30. Why did the computer keep sneezing? It had a bad case of CAPS LOCK.
  31. Why did the Facebook status go to therapy? It couldn’t handle the comments.
  32. Why was the computer at the bar? It had a hard drive.
  33. What did the Google search say to the suspicious user? I feel lucky.
  34. Why did the girl break up with her laptop? She didn’t like his type.
  35. Why did the hashtag break up with the trending topic? It felt used.
  36. How does an Instagram post say goodbye? “See you in the highlights!”
  37. How did the computer catch a fish? Using the Internet.
  38. Why did the YouTube video go to therapy? It couldn’t handle the dislikes.
  39. What did the email say to the spam folder? “I miss you!”
  40. Why did the browser go to the bar? It needed to clear its cookies.
  41. What do social media managers do when they’re in love? They DM each other.
  42. Why did the social media post go to the party? To get more likes.
  43. Why did the tweet go to school? It wanted to be well-read.
  44. Why was the Instagram picture a great detective? It knew how to get a lead.
  45. How does Facebook flirt? It pokes you.
  46. Why did the Pinterest Pin go to the gym? It wanted to stay in shape.
  47. What did the Instagram filter say to the photo? Let’s take this to the next level.
  48. Why did the smartphone go to the concert? It wanted to live-stream.
  49. Why did the hashtag take a vacation? It was feeling overused.
  50. Why did the computer get a ticket? It had too many illegal operations.
  51. What’s a computer’s favorite animal? A RAM.
  52. Why did the WiFi signal break up with the smartphone? It felt too connected.
  53. What do you call a picture taken by a cat? A purr-fect selfie.
  54. What do you call a reptile that becomes a social media sensation? An insta-gator.
  55. Why did the mobile app get a promotion? It was very user-friendly.
  56. Why don’t robots use social media? They hate artificial intelligence.
  57. What does a computer eat when it gets hungry? Chips.
  58. Why was the smartphone a great actor? It always played its role.
  59. Why did the computer go to the beach? It wanted to surf the web.
  60. How does a computer call its friend? It gives it a ringtone.
  61. Why did the Facebook post go to the gym? It wanted more likes.
  62. What’s a computer’s favorite snack? Microchips.
  63. Why did the internet go to the party? To get connected.
  64. What did the text message say to the spam? Can you not?
  65. Why did the computer sit on the ice? It wanted to cool down.
  66. Why was the Facebook post a great chef? It knew how to stir the pot.
  67. Why did the email go to the doctor? It felt compressed.
  68. Why did the blog post go to the concert? It wanted to be a rockstar.
  69. What’s a computer’s favorite clothing? Software.
  70. What did the YouTube video say to the ad? “Skip.”
  71. Why did the tweet go to the museum? It wanted to be a piece of art.
  72. What’s a computer’s favorite dance move? The gigabyte.
  73. Why did the Instagram account go to the doctor? It had too many followers.
  74. Why did the computer break up with its girlfriend? It felt no connection.
  75. What do computers eat for breakfast? Syrup-typed pancakes.
  76. Why did the smartphone win the lottery? It knew all the digits.
  77. Why did the computer get promoted? It had a lot of drive.
  78. Why did the computer go to the bank? To make a data deposit.
  79. What does a computer do at lunchtime? It takes a byte.
  80. Why did the computer go on a diet? It had too many bytes.
  81. Why did the tweet go to jail? It exceeded 280 characters.
  82. Why did the computer get married? It found its perfect match online.
  83. What did the Facebook profile picture say to the old photo? I’ve profiled you.
  84. Why did the computer break up with its keyboard? It wasn’t its type.
  85. Why did the post go viral? It was infectious.
  86. Why did the computer join the circus? It wanted to join the network.
  87. Why was the smartphone always happy? It always had an app for that.
  88. Why was the computer bankrupt? It gave out too many free bytes.
  89. Why did the YouTube video get a job?It had a lot of views.
  90. Why did the smartphone go to college? It wanted to improve its data processing skills.
  91. Why did the Instagram filter get promoted? It made everything look better.
  92. Why did the computer get kicked out of the house? It left Windows open.
  93. Why did the emoji go to therapy? It couldn’t handle the feels.
  94. What did the social media account say to its followers? “Stop stalking me!”
  95. Why did the computer go to the party? It heard there would be chips.
  96. Why did the computer break up with its mouse? It found a better click.
  97. Why did the smartphone get glasses? It lost all its contacts.
  98. Why did the Internet date the computer? It liked its software.
  99. What do computers snack on? Computer chips.
  100. Why did the programmer go broke? Because he used up all his cache.
  101. What do you call a cat who loves to browse online? A web crawler.
  102. Why did the computer get lost? It lost track of its bytes.
  103. Why did the computer see a doctor? It had a virus.
  104. Why did the Facebook user go to jail? He liked everything he saw.
  105. Why did the computer visit its friends? It wanted to network.
  106. Why did the computer bring an umbrella? It heard there was a chance of a cloud burst.
  107. Why did the smartphone never get lost? It always knew the right app to use.
  108. Why did the social media post go on a diet? It wanted to slim down its content.
  109. Why did the computer get a job at the bakery? It was a whiz at rolling out dough.
  110. What’s a computer’s favorite song? “Streaming Queen.”
  111. Why did the Facebook status update go to the casino? It wanted to hit the jackpot with likes.
  112. Why was the smartphone always tired? It ran too many apps at once.
  113. Why did the computer get an award? It had outstanding applications.
  114. Why did the tablet go to the art class? It wanted to improve its sketching skills.
  115. What did the laptop say to the plug? I’m feeling drained.
  116. Why did the computer become a gardener? It had a green thumb drive.
  117. Why did the smartphone join a band? It had great vibes.
  118. Why did the social media account go to the gym? It wanted to work on its profile.
  119. What do you call a computer that can sing? A-Dell.
  120. Why did the computer break its promise? It had memory issues.
  121. What did the smartphone say to the charger? I’m so connected to you.
  122. Why did the computer go camping? It wanted to log out.
  123. Why was the tablet a great comedian? It knew how to crack people up.
  124. Why did the laptop join the football team? It wanted to get its keys in shape.
  125. Why did the computer become a teacher? It had all the right keys to success.
  126. Why did the social media account get a sunburn? It forgot to adjust its brightness settings.
  127. What do you call a computer that tells jokes? A com-pun-ter.
  128. What did the computer say to the printer? Stop making everything so graphic.
  129. What do you call an iPhone that isn’t kidding around? Dead Siri-ous.
  130. Why did the social media account get in shape? It didn’t want to be a soft-ware.
  131. Why did the computer go to the bar? It heard they had apple-tinis.
  132. What’s a computer’s favorite tea? Java.
  133. Why did the computer take its shoes off? Because it had bad boot sectors.
  134. What did the Instagram post say to the Facebook post? Let’s hang out in the cloud.
  135. Why was the smartphone a great writer? It had text appeal.
  136. Why did the computer go on a date? It was looking for a byte to eat.
  137. Why did the computer get glasses? To improve its bytesight.
  138. Why did the social media post get a haircut? It wanted to trim its content.
  139. Why did the tweet go to the gym? It wanted to work on its character limit.
  140. Why did the computer eat a lightbulb? It wanted a byte of energy.
  141. Why was the computer always at the beach? It liked surfing the web.
  142. Why did the smartphone go to the doctor? It had bad cell service.
  143. What’s a computer’s favorite ride? The hard drive.
  144. What do you call a computer floating in the ocean? A-Dell rolling in the deep.
  145. Why did the tablet never fight? It always wanted to stay in the safe mode.
  146. Why did the smartphone need therapy? It suffered from too many hang-ups.
  147. Why did the computer join the Navy? It wanted to surf the internet.
  148. Why was the computer a good musician? It had lots of gigs.
  149. Why did the social media post get a job? It wanted to be a professional LinkedIn.
  150. Why was the laptop always happy? It always felt at the top of the table.

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