144 funny night shift jokes

1. Why did the night shift worker bring a broom to work? Because they heard they might have to “sweep” all night!
2. Why don’t night shift workers play hide and seek? Because good luck hiding when your eyes are half shut!
3. Why did the night shift worker apply to be a baker? Because he kneaded the dough.
4. What do you call a night shift worker who can play the piano? A “key” worker!
5. Why do vampires love the night shift? Because they’re afraid of daylight savings!
6. Why did the ghost apply for the night shift? Because it’s the only time he can work “un-boo-lievably” hard!
7. Why don’t night shift workers make good detectives? Because they always miss the day-tails!
8. How does the night shift nurse light up her life? She takes a break at the break of dawn!
9. What’s the night shift worker’s favorite song? “Night Shifts Are Made For Coffee”!
10. Why was the night shift worker’s report salty? Because he worked on it all “fry-day” night!
11. How does the night shift guard keep warm? He uses a “security blanket”!
12. Why did the moon get a job on the night shift? Because he wasn’t a “morning star”!
13. What do you call a night shift worker at a candy factory? A sweet dreamer!
14. Why did the night shift worker bring sunglasses to work? Because he doesn’t want to be recognized in the daylight!
15. What did the night shift worker say to the sunrise? “You’re early, I’m still clocked in.”
16. Why don’t night shift workers play cards? Because they are always dealing with night stakes!
17. Why did the night shift worker bring a ladder to work? He thought he could reach for the stars!
18. What does a night shift worker call a good night’s sleep? A daydream!
19. Why did the night shift worker carry an alarm clock? To know when to stop working and start sleeping!
20. How do night shift workers avoid speeding tickets? They drive home when the cops are still asleep!
21. Why did the night shift worker take a flashlight to work? To lighten up his mood!
22. How does a night shift worker keep their hair so glossy? They have plenty of time to moon-bathe!
23. What did the night shift worker say to the coffee machine? “You’re my only shot at staying awake!”
24. Why did the night owl apply for the night shift job? He heard there would be no early birds!
25. Why was the night shift worker a bad comedian? He kept messing up the punchlines because he was too sleepy!
26. How does the night shift worker tell time? By the yawns per hour!
27. Why don’t night shift workers make good farmers? They can’t catch the early worm!
28. What do night shift workers and bats have in common? They’re both creatures of the night!
29. Why do night shift workers always carry a pen? To note down their dreams in case they fall asleep!
30. How does a night shift worker say goodnight? “See you at the crack of noon!”
31. Why don’t night shift workers become photographers? They can’t capture the golden hour!
32. What do you call a night shift worker who’s good at boxing? A knockout!
33. What did the night shift worker say when he saw a shooting star? “Finally, someone else is also working late!”
34. How does a night shift worker keep fit? By running away from the sunrise!
35. Why did the night shift worker become a writer? He wanted to pen down his nightmares!
36. What’s a night shift worker’s favorite fruit? “Night-cherry”!
37. Why was the night shift worker’s book so scary? It was full of night-mares!
38. How does a night shift worker get ready for work? By tucking the sun into bed!
39. What’s the night shift worker’s secret to a good night’s sleep? Sunscreen!
40. What’s a night shift worker’s favorite plant? The “night-blooming cereus”!
41. Why did the night shift worker become a movie director? He was already great at shooting stars!
42. What did the night shift worker say to the energy drink? “You’re my knight in shining armor!”
43. Why was the night shift worker so calm? He had finally found peace and quiet!
44. What’s the night shift worker’s favorite type of car? The “night Rider”!
45. Why did the night shift worker bring a fishing rod to work? He thought he could catch some night-crawlers!
46. Why was the night shift worker always broke? His money always vanished by daylight!
47. What do you call a night shift worker who’s a superhero? “Nightman”!
48. What’s a night shift worker’s least favorite book? “The Early Bird’s Guide to Success”!
49. How does a night shift worker stop himself from overeating? By having dinner for breakfast!
50. What do night shift workers and astronomers have in common? They’re both up all night, star-gazing!

I’m going to take a break now.

Oh, wait, you said no breaks.

Alright, let’s continue!

51. Why don’t night shift workers like playing chess? They always lose their knights!
52. Why did the night shift worker start a band? He wanted to be a rock-star!
53. Why was the night shift worker a bad artist? He couldn’t draw the sun!
54. How do night shift workers celebrate Christmas? They wait for Santa during their shift!
55. What’s a night shift worker’s favorite season? Winter – longer nights mean more working hours!
56. Why did the night shift worker start a diet? He wanted to lose some midnight snack pounds!
57. Why did the night shift worker become a poet? He found a lot of inspiration in the moonlight!
58. Why did the night shift worker adopt a cat? He heard they were nocturnal, too!
59. How does a night shift worker plan a vacation? He sleeps through it!
60. What’s a night shift worker’s favorite movie? “The Dark Night”!
61. Why did the night shift worker have a dark sense of humor? Because he was never up at the crack of dawn!
62. Why don’t night shift workers like playing football? They can’t make it to morning practice!
63. What did the night shift worker say to his bed? “Long time no see!”
64. Why did the night shift worker become an astronaut? He was already working under the stars!
65. What’s a night shift worker’s favorite drink? Moonshine!
66. What’s a night shift worker’s favorite game? “Nightopoly”!
67. Why was the night shift worker a terrible gardener? He missed all the morning dew!
68. Why do night shift workers like Twitter? Because they can tweet while the world sleeps!
69. Why did the night shift worker go to the casino? He wanted to try his luck while everyone else was asleep!
70. What do you call a night shift worker who’s also a vampire? A night manager!
71. What’s a night shift worker’s favorite type of music? Jazz – it’s best listened to late at night!
72. What’s a night shift worker’s favorite breed of dog? A “night-errier”!
73. Why did the night shift worker become a politician? He was used to working under shady conditions!
74. What did the night shift worker say to the morning shift worker? “I’ll see you when I wake up!”
75. What’s a night shift worker’s favorite type of coffee? Midnight roast!
76. Why was the night shift worker so romantic? He had plenty of time to look at the moon!
77. Why did the night shift worker bring a blanket to work? He wanted to make sure he was covered!
78. Why did the night shift worker always carry a map? So he wouldn’t lose his way in the dark!
79. How do night shift workers share their secrets? They whisper them under the cover of darkness!
80. What’s a night shift worker’s favorite type of bird? The nightingale!
81. Why did the night shift worker start a YouTube channel? He thought he could become an overnight sensation!
82. What’s a night shift worker’s favorite type of bread? Moon-shaped croissants!
83. Why did the night shift worker become a comedian? He thought he could use a good laugh in the middle of the night!
84. Why did the night shift worker bring a telescope to work? He wanted to see what he was missing during the day!
85. Why did the night shift worker start a gym membership? He was tired of working out under the moonlight!
86. What’s a night shift worker’s favorite day of the week? Moonday!
87. What’s a night shift worker’s favorite type of sandwich? A moon-cheese sandwich!
88. Why did the night shift worker become a chef? He was tired of late-night microwave dinners!
89. Why don’t night shift workers make good poets? They miss the morning muse!
90. What’s a night shift worker’s favorite superhero? Batman!
91. What’s a night shift worker’s favorite flower? Moonflower!
92. Why did the night shift worker always carry a notebook? In case he thought of a great idea while the world was asleep!
93. Why don’t night shift workers like sunrise? It’s their bedtime alarm!
94. What’s a night shift worker’s favorite animal? An owl, they share the same hours!
95. Why don’t night shift workers like ice cream? It melts before their break!
96. Why did the night shift worker start a fashion line? He thought nightwear should be more glamorous!
97. Why did the night shift worker always wear black? He was mourning for his lost sleep!
98. What do you call a night shift worker who’s also a thief? A cat burglar!
99. Why did the night shift worker become a philosopher? He had plenty of time to think!
100. Why don’t night shift workers make good teachers? They miss the school bus!
101. Why did the night shift worker become a firefighter? He wanted to light up the night!
102. Why don’t night shift workers like doing laundry? They can’t separate the whites – they can’t see them!
103. What did the night shift worker say to the full moon? “Quit showing off, some of us are working!”
104. Why was the night shift worker a bad singer? He could only sing lullabies!
105. Why did the night shift worker always wear a hat? He thought it would keep the sunrise out of his eyes!
106. What’s a night shift worker’s favorite type of shoe? Moon boots!
107. What do you call a night shift worker at a fast-food restaurant? A “fry-by-night”!
108. Why don’t night shift workers make good sailors? They miss the morning tide!
109. Why did the night shift worker always carry an umbrella? He was preparing for a sunrise shower!
110. Why don’t night shift workers like snow? It’s too bright for their eyes!
111. Why did the night shift worker become a journalist? He was looking for the midnight scoop!
112. What do you call a night shift worker who’s also a magician? A night illusionist!
113. Why did the night shift worker become a runner? He was racing the sunrise!
114. What’s a night shift worker’s favorite type of cake? Moon pie!
115. What do you call a night shift worker who’s also a superhero? The Night Watchman!
116. Why don’t night shift workers make good bakers? They can’t wake up early enough to make the doughnuts!
117. What did the night shift worker say when he saw the northern lights? “Now that’s a perk of my job!”
118. Why did the night shift worker always carry a mirror? He liked to reflect on his night!
119. Why don’t night shift workers like camping? They can’t enjoy the night sky – they see it too often!
120. Why did the night shift worker become a bartender? He thought he could use a night cap!
121. What do you call a night shift worker who’s also a ghost? The Night Specter!
122. Why did the night shift worker become a detective? He was looking for the midnight clues!
123. Why did the night shift worker bring a book to work? He was hoping to have a goodnight story!
124. Why don’t night shift workers like pizza? It’s too hot to handle in the middle of the night!
125. What do you call a night shift worker at a bakery? A “dough-night”!
126. Why did the night shift worker always carry a flashlight? He was looking for the break of dawn!
127. Why don’t night shift workers like balloons? They can’t enjoy the daylight to see them!
128. What’s a night shift worker’s favorite type of cookie? Moon pies!
129. What do you call a night shift worker at a circus? A midnight performer!
130. Why did the night shift worker always wear a watch? He was counting down to sunrise!
131. Why don’t night shift workers like beaches? They miss the morning waves!
132. What’s a night shift worker’s favorite type of salad? Moonlight Caesar!
133. Why did the night shift worker always carry a notepad? He was drafting his dreams!
134. Why did the night shift worker always carry a sleeping bag? He was preparing for a quick nap!
135. Why did the night shift worker become an archaeologist? He was looking for the midnight relics!
136. What do you call a night shift worker at a zoo? A night owl keeper!
137. Why don’t night shift workers like rivers? They miss the morning mist!
138. Why did the night shift worker always carry a pillow? He was preparing for a power nap!
139. What’s a night shift worker’s favorite type of pasta? Moonlight spaghetti!
140. Why don’t night shift workers like coffee shops? They close before their break!
141. What’s a night shift worker’s favorite type of soup? Midnight minestrone!
142. Why did the night shift worker become a fortune teller? He was reading the stars!
143. Why don’t night shift workers like park benches? They’re too cold to sit on at night!
144. Why did the night shift worker always wear sunglasses? He was protecting his eyes from the harsh daylight!