100 noodle jokes

  1. Why don’t noodles make good detectives? They always pasta evidence.
  2. What did the penne say to the macaroni? “You’re a real elbow bender.”
  3. Why do noodles never get lost? Because they use a pasta map.
  4. Why do noodles make terrible secret agents? They always spill the beans.
  5. Why did the tomato turn red? Because it saw the salad dressing and realized it pasta go change.
  6. What do you call an Italian cat? A pasta-cat.
  7. What did the noodle say to the tomato? Don’t get saucy with me!
  8. Why was the pasta naked? It lost its sauce.
  9. Why did the pasta go to the party? It heard there would be a spaghetti-together.
  10. What do you call a noodle that plays the guitar? A rock and rollini.
  11. Why was the noodle broke? It pasta lot of money.
  12. Why did the spaghetti break up with the penne? It found someone more al dente.
  13. What do you call a fast noodle? A sprintghetti.
  14. Why are noodles so self-centered? They’re always thinking pasta themselves.
  15. What’s a noodle’s favorite exercise? Pilatelle.
  16. What did the noodle say to the butter? Stop stringing me along.
  17. Why do noodles make lousy comedians? They always pasta punch line.
  18. What’s a noodle’s favorite place to visit? The Spaghetty Western.
  19. Why was the noodle on the basketball team? It has great pasta-ing skills.
  20. Why did the noodle go to the doctor? It had a case of bow-elbow pain.
  21. What’s a noodle’s favorite type of music? Pop-eroni.
  22. Why don’t noodles make good actors? They always pasta up the role.
  23. Why was the spaghetti stuck in traffic? It pasta stop sign.
  24. What did the mama noodle say to the baby noodle? “Time for pasta-bed.”
  25. What do you call a high-end noodle? Fettuccine fancy.
  26. Why did the noodle go to school? To get a little more pasta-cation.
  27. Why was the noodle feeling guilty? It was impasta.
  28. Why was the pasta a good reporter? It always knew the scoop.
  29. What did the linguine say to the penne? “You’re too cut up about everything.”
  30. What’s a noodle’s favorite dance? The Pasta-doble.
  31. Why did the noodle go to the psychiatrist? It had pasta-traumatic stress disorder.
  32. Why don’t noodles make good singers? They’re always off key-anti.
  33. Why was the noodle always in trouble? It couldn’t pasta behavior test.
  34. Why did the noodle get a ticket? It pasta speed limit.
  35. What do you call a dishonest noodle? An impasta.
  36. What do you call a rich noodle? Upper crust-acean.
  37. Why did the noodle get promoted? It worked pasta-dically.
  38. Why did the pasta go to jail? It was charged with a-salt and buttery.
  39. Why do noodles hate winters? They risk becoming pasta-cicles.
  40. What’s a noodle’s favorite animal? A gir-alfredo.
  41. Why don’t noodles make good quarterbacks? They always throw pasta away.
  42. Why was the noodle tired? It was pasta-ted out.
  43. What’s a noodle’s favorite day of the week? Spaghetti Sunday.
  44. Why was the noodle scared of the sauce? It didn’t want to feel raviolent.
  45. Why don’t noodles make good politicians? They’re always spinning things.
  46. What’s a noodle’s favorite sport? Pasta-pony.
  47. What did the spaghetti say to the other spaghetti? “Pasta sauce, please!”
  48. Why don’t noodles make good explorers? They always pasta over hidden treasures.
  49. Why was the spaghetti sad? It pasta away.
  50. What did the noodle say to the lasagna? “I’m pasta-tively in love with you.”
  51. What did the noodle say to its dinner date? “I’m feeling saucy tonight.”
  52. Why are noodles never early? They always pasta fashionably late.
  53. Why was the noodle feeling off-color? It pasta expiry date.
  54. Why are noodles such bad tennis players? They always serve up a fault.
  55. Why did the noodle join the gym? It wanted to feel pasta-rific.
  56. Why was the noodle sad at the concert? It was pasta hearing range.
  57. What do you call a noodle that takes up photography? A pasta-tographer.
  58. What do you call a pasta that’s a bad loser? A sore loosa-anya.
  59. Why do noodles make poor chemists? They can’t handle the pasta-urization process.
  60. Why did the noodle get a job? It was tired of pasta-ing the time away.
  61. Why did the noodle become a farmer? To pasta time away.
  62. Why was the noodle arrested? It was caught pasta-ing illegal documents.
  63. What did the rotini say to the penne? “You’re not very straight-forward.”
  64. Why did the noodle join the orchestra? It wanted to play the pasta-ccatos.
  65. What did the spaghetti say to the meatball? “You’re really well-rounded!”
  66. Why don’t noodles make good comedians? They always pasta punch line.
  67. Why are noodles the best friends? They always stick together.
  68. What’s a noodle’s favorite type of dog? A spaghett-bulldog.
  69. What do you call a religious noodle? Pasta-r.
  70. Why was the noodle so musical? It loved pasta-ccatos.
  71. Why did the noodles go to the disco? To do the pasta-doble.
  72. Why did the noodle get a tattoo? It wanted to be pasta-nate.
  73. What’s a noodle’s favorite type of shoe? Pasta-dilles.
  74. Why don’t noodles play poker in the jungle? Too many cheetahs!
  75. What did the noodle say when it sneezed? Pasta-chew!
  76. What did the noodle say to the boiling water? “I’m pasta-terrified of you.”
  77. Why was the noodle always playing cards? It was a pasta-gambler.
  78. Why don’t noodles make good secret agents? They pasta-don’t know how to keep a secret.
  79. Why did the noodle cross the road? To get to the other pasta-de.
  80. What’s a noodle’s favorite movie? “The Pasta and the Furious.”
  81. Why are noodles such great artists? They always pasta-sketch the competition.
  82. Why did the noodle fail at gardening? It couldn’t pasta dig the soil.
  83. What did the pasta say to the cheese? “Without you, I’m grate-less.”
  84. Why don’t noodles like to play hide and seek? Because good pasta is always hard to find.
  85. What’s a noodle’s favorite pop star? Spaghetti Spears.
  86. Why did the noodle go on a diet? It was feeling pasta-lutely stuffed.
  87. What do you call a noodle that doesn’t believe in magic? A pastagnostic.
  88. What do you call a noodle that is stuck in one place? Pasta-tized.
  89. What did the noodle say to the treadmill? “You’re pasta-rizing me!”
  90. Why are noodles great storytellers? They always pasta-nate their audience.
  91. Why did the noodle get a ticket? It pasta no parking sign.
  92. Why do noodles never get cold? They wear pasta-necks.
  93. Why was the pasta a good journalist? It always knew the pasta-nate news.
  94. Why was the noodle feeling romantic? It was pasta-mooning.
  95. What’s a noodle’s favorite TV show? “The Walking Spaghetti.”
  96. What did the noodle say to the upset sauce? “It’s pasta-ble to make it better.”
  97. Why was the noodle a good magician? It pasta-d all the magic tests.
  98. Why don’t noodles like to argue? They hate pasta-aggressive behavior.
  99. Why was the pasta a good gardener? It was pasta-digging holes.
  100. What’s a noodle’s favorite book? “Harry Potter and the Philosopher’s Scone.”

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