82 mc jokes
- Why don’t emcees ever play hide and seek? Because good luck hiding when you’re always dropping the mic!
- Why did the DJ stop the music? Because he couldn’t find the track!
- What does an MC wear to a formal event? A suit and “tie-rap.”
- Why do rappers always have time awareness? Because they always beat the clock!
- What do you call a hip-hop artist who can knit? 2Pac of wool.
- What’s a rapper’s favorite candy? Eminems!
- What do you call a rapper who’s good at math? Multiply-Z.
- Why did the rapper carry a pencil? In case he wanted to draw a beat!
- What did the hip hop artist say at the bakery? I knead dough!
- Why don’t rappers get locked out? Because they always got the keys!
- Why was the rapper good at basketball? Because he always hit the beat!
- What do you call a rapper who’s an insomniac? Snooz-Dogg.
- Why don’t emcees get lost? They always follow the beat!
- What did the rapper say when he was gardening? Lettuce turnip the beet!
- What does a rapper use for transportation? A lyrical bus!
- Why are hip-hop artists bad at saving money? Because they always drop the bills!
- What’s an emcee’s favorite drink? Microphone check… one two, one brew!
- Why do rappers never get cold? Because they always have sick beats!
- How do rappers say hello in France? Bonjour, I’m A$AP Baguette!
- What do you call a rapper who’s good at chess? Check-Mate-Z.
- Why did the rapper go to school? To master his degrees!
- What’s a rapper’s favorite vegetable? Turnip!
- How do rappers cut their hair? They fade it!
- What’s an emcee’s favorite school subject? Geography – they love to map out their lyrics.
- Why did the rapper bring a ladder on stage? He wanted to take his act to the next level!
- What’s an emcee’s favorite exercise? Rhyme-jumping.
- What’s a rapper’s favorite part of a joke? The punchline, it’s like a beat drop.
- Why did the rapper go to the mechanic? His rhymes were out of alignment.
- What do you call a rapper who is a great cook? Chef Rhymes.
- How do rappers like their tea? With a spoon full of verses.
- Why did the rapper go to the dentist? He had a cavity in his lyrics.
- What’s a rapper’s favorite day of the week? Beats-day.
- Why don’t rappers make good electricians? Because they can’t resist dropping the bass!
- Why was the rapper a good architect? He knew how to build a bridge.
- What’s a rapper’s favorite city? Versailles.
- What’s a rapper’s favorite book? The Catcher in the Rhyme.
- What’s a rapper’s favorite card game? Gin Rhymey.
- Why did the rapper become a farmer? He wanted to grow his own beats.
- What’s a rapper’s favorite planet? Mars, because it’s got bars.
- What did the rapper say at the pizza place? “Extra cheese, with a side of beats, please!”
- Why do rappers like basketball? Because of the dribble.
- What’s a rapper’s favorite bird? Lyric-an Finch.
- What did the rapper say to the waiter? “Check, one two!”
- How does a rapper prepare for a boxing match? By writing punchlines.
- Why did the rapper study astronomy? He wanted to spit bars about the stars.
- What did the rapper say at the end of yoga class? Nam-aste up in the studio.
- What’s a rapper’s favorite fruit? A beat-nana.
- Why don’t rappers play baseball? They can’t handle the pitcher’s flow.
- Why did the rapper go to therapy? He couldn’t get past his emotional bars.
- What’s a rapper’s favorite flower? Rhymeblossom.
- What’s a rapper’s favorite insect? Beettles.
- Why do rappers love geometry? Because it’s all about the angles.
- How do rappers organize their schedule? They keep a raplendar.
- Why did the rapper get a stopwatch? So he could always be on beat.
- Why don’t rappers play soccer? Because they can’t stop dropping the ball.
- What did the rapper say at the gym? “Let’s get physical with the lyrical!”
- What’s a rapper’s favorite type of cake? Rhymeberry.
- Why do rappers love horror movies? The suspense is killer.
- Why do rappers like graffiti? It’s street art with heart.
- What did the rapper bring to the potluck? Rhyme Ribs.
- What’s a rapper’s favorite type of pasta? Linguini with a side of linguistics.
- What’s a rapper’s favorite type of pie? Pecan, but with extra rhythm.
- How do rappers stay warm in winter? They bundle up in beats.
- Why do rappers love magic tricks? They’re all about the illusion.
- Why don’t rappers play cricket? They can’t handle the spin.
- What’s a rapper’s favorite type of painting? Abstract with a strong composition.
- Why do rappers love origami? It’s all about the creases.
- Why do rappers love camping? It’s all about the wilderness freestyle.
- What did the rapper say at the bank? “I’d like to make a deposit, please, and don’t forget the interest!”
- What did the rapper say to his tailor? “Make sure the fit is as tight as my lyrics.”
- Why do rappers love roller coasters? It’s all about the highs and lows.
- What’s a rapper’s favorite type of car? A convertible for top down verses.
- Why don’t rappers play golf? They can’t handle the swing.
- What’s a rapper’s favorite type of coffee? Decaf with a shot of lyrical genius.
- Why do rappers love to read? It’s all about the narrative.
- Why do rappers love to swim? They’re all about the flow.
- What’s a rapper’s favorite type of music? Anything but rap… they like a break from work.
- Why do rappers love to cook? It’s all about the mix.
- What’s a rapper’s favorite type of hat? A snapback with a catchy tagline.
- Why do rappers love to dance? It’s all about the movement.
- What’s a rapper’s favorite type of dog? A bulldog for its stubborn tenacity.
- Why do rappers love yoga? It’s all about the flexibility.