81 crafty jokes
- Why don’t we ever tell secrets in a craft store? Because the walls have ears, and the glue sticks!
- Why did the quilter always carry a notebook? They wanted to keep track of their material.
- Why did the artist break up with his pencil? It was just a sketchy relationship.
- How do you stop a knitter from getting into trouble? Keep them in stitches.
- Why was the paper a poor comedian? It always folded under pressure.
- Why did the needle get lost in the quilt? It was playing hide and ‘seam’.
- What does an artist do when they can’t find their brush? They just brush it off!
- Why couldn’t the string go into the second-hand store? It was afraid of being pulled apart.
- What did the scissors say to the wrapping paper? “Cut it out!”
- Why was the sketchbook so confident? It knew it had all the right lines.
- What did the felt tip pen say to the paper? “I’m drawn to you.”
- How does a paintbrush like to relax? It goes for a dip.
- Why did the yarn refuse to play hide and seek? Because good luck hiding when you’re always unraveled.
- Why don’t artists ever win at poker? Because they always draw.
- What do you call a crafty dinosaur? A do-it-your-saurus.
- Why did the canvas go to therapy? It had too many hang-ups.
- What do you call a necklace that’s always complaining? A whine stone.
- Why was the painter always calm? Because he could always draw on his inner peace.
- Why didn’t the scissors make the cut? They just couldn’t handle the pressure.
- What do you call a pirate who likes to crochet? A Yarrrn-lover.
- Why was the sewing machine a great athlete? It was always running.
- What did the glue say to the paper? “Stick with me, kid.”
- How do you know if a painter is good at hide-and-seek? They blend in well.
- Why was the craft paper a good detective? It always knew how to fold the case.
- What did the sewing machine say to the thread? “You’re really spooling my leg.”
- Why did the sketch pad go to school? It wanted to learn how to draw conclusions.
- Why did the chisel break up with the stone? It felt taken for granite.
- What did the paint say to the paintbrush? “I like you, no need to brush me off.”
- Why did the marker go on a diet? It felt a bit too thick.
- Why did the scissors get a timeout? They just couldn’t cut it out.
- What do you call a well-organized craft room? A place where everything’s scrapbooked.
- Why did the artist become a gardener? He had a natural talent for drawing plants.
- What do you call a crayon that doesn’t draw? Pointless.
- What did the pot say to the potter? “You’re spinning me right round, baby!”
- Why did the eraser go to the party? To rub shoulders with the big shots.
- Why did the pencil go to school? To get a little sharper.
- What did the tape say to the gift? “I’m stuck on you.”
- Why did the knitting needle get in trouble? It was always stirring up knit.
- Why did the fabric go to therapy? It had a pattern of self-destruction.
- What did the thread say to the needle? “Don’t try to poke fun at me!”
- Why was the paintbrush always in trouble? It always went against the grain.
- Why did the chalk go to the party? It felt drawn to it.
- What do you call a crafty elevator? Lift-arting.
- What’s a crafty spider’s favorite meal? Web sandwiches.
- Why was the paint tube upset? Because it was squeezed all day.
- What do you call a crafty cat? Purr-casso.
- Why did the clay go to the doctor? It was feeling a bit molded.
- Why did the quilter always carry bandages? In case of emergency patchwork.
- What did the tape measure say to the dress? “Let’s see how long this relationship can measure up.”
- What did the eraser say to the pencil? “Stop making mistakes!”
- Why was the yarn always broke? It was always spinning cash.
- Why did the sticker get a good job? It knew how to stick to it.
- What do you call a crafty beach? Sand-crafted.
- Why did the origami worker quit? Too much paperwork.
- What did the bead say to the string? “Don’t get all tied up about it.”
- Why did the watercolor go to therapy? It had too many watered-down emotions.
- Why did the knitting pattern go to school? It wanted to be well-read.
- Why did the scissors never lose at poker? They always had a pair.
- What did the pencil say to the paper? “I think we’re on the same page.”
- Why don’t craft supplies play hide and seek? Because good luck hiding when you’re always marked.
- What did the yarn say to the knitting needles? “Knit’s been real.”
- What’s the craftiest state in the USA? Cut-ahoe.
- What did the tape say to the craft table? “We stick together.”
- Why did the painter go to jail? Because he was caught framing.
- What did the ruler say to the pencil? “Stay in line!”
- Why did the thread go to the bar? It wanted to unwind.
- What did the sequin say to the needle? “Thanks for the push.”
- What do you call a crafty flower? A bloomin’ artist.
- Why was the sketchbook so nosy? It always wanted to get the lead out.
- What do you call a baker with a knitting habit? A dough-hooker.
- Why did the quilter always break up with his dates? He was afraid of attachment.
- Why did the button go to school? To learn how to button up.
- Why did the fabric store go out of business? It just couldn’t make ends meet.
- Why did the paintbrush go to the beach? To have a little stroke in the water.
- What did the colored pencil say to the sharpener? “Stop going in circles!”
- Why was the glue always in trouble? It couldn’t keep itself together.
- Why did the scissors get an award? They were a cut above the rest.
- What did the origami paper say to the scissors? “You’re tear-ifying.”
- Why did the beads break up? They couldn’t string along any longer.
- What did the marker say to the highlighter? “You brighten up my day!”
- Why did the paint go to school? To get a little more brushed up on its skills.