150 candle jokes

  1. Why don’t candles ever go to school? Because they’re always burning the midnight oil.
  2. Why was the candle talking to the match? Because it found its perfect match.
  3. What do you call a candle in armor? A knight light.
  4. Why was the candle feeling stressed? It was under too much wick pressure.
  5. Why don’t candles make good detectives? Because they always burn their leads.
  6. What did one candle say to the other? “You’re going out tonight, aren’t you?”
  7. Why did the candle get a penalty? For illegal wick-ening.
  8. How do candles say sorry? They “wick” up for it.
  9. What’s a candle’s favorite type of humor? Burnt jokes.
  10. Why are candles terrible at hide and seek? Because they always get lit.
  11. Why was the candle always working? Because it didn’t know how to put its light off.
  12. Why did the candle never stop talking? It just kept going on and waxing.
  13. Why did the candle go to the party? To lighten up the mood.
  14. Why don’t candles fight? They know how to keep their wick under control.
  15. Why did the candle stick to its day job? It didn’t want to burn out.
  16. Why did the candle go to therapy? It felt burnt out.
  17. What did the candle say to the fire extinguisher? “You’re a wet blanket.”
  18. What do you call a smart candle? Bright and wick-ed.
  19. Why was the candle always in trouble? It had a fiery temper.
  20. How do candles write secret messages? In Morse Code, but it’s all dots and no dashes.
  21. Why did the candle go to the doctor? It was feeling a little light-headed.
  22. What did the birthday cake say to the candle? “You’re the light of the party!”
  23. Why did the candle start meditating? It wanted to find its inner light.
  24. How do candles communicate? They burn signals.
  25. Why was the candle so popular? It was always the life of the party.
  26. What did the candle say to the moth? “I know I’m attractive, but this relationship is too fiery for me!”
  27. What did the candle say to its wax? “Don’t drip out on me now!”
  28. What’s a candle’s favorite day of the week? Wicks-end.
  29. Why did the candle never procrastinate? It knew time was burning.
  30. How does a candle propose? “Will you light up my life forever?”
  31. Why was the candle always broke? It kept burning through cash.
  32. Why was the candle so fit? It always worked out with light weights.
  33. Why did the candle never get lost? It always followed the light.
  34. What’s a candle’s favorite exercise? The wick-lift.
  35. Why did the candle make a terrible actor? It always melted under pressure.
  36. What’s a candle’s favorite part of a song? The light notes.
  37. What did the candle say to the light bulb? “I was lighting up rooms before it was cool.”
  38. Why did the candle refuse the promotion? It didn’t want to get burnt out.
  39. What does a candle do on its birthday? It blows itself out.
  40. What do you call a candle that sings? A wax lyrical.
  41. Why don’t candles ever go camping? They’re afraid of burning the tent down.
  42. What’s a candle’s favorite food? Light snacks.
  43. How does a candle say goodbye? It burns out.
  44. Why was the candle a great musician? It always played by ear(wick).
  45. Why did the candle lose the race? It burnt out before the finish line.
  46. What do you call a group of musical candles? A wax band.
  47. Why was the candle a bad student? It always burned its homework.
  48. What do you call a candle in a suit? Dressed to the nines, but still melts under pressure.
  49. Why was the candle a poor investment? It’s a total burn.
  50. What does a candle do after a breakup? It burns all the love letters.
  51. Why did the candle join the circus? It loved the spotlight.
  52. What do you call a candle that tells time? A wick-watch.
  53. What did the candle say to the sun? “You’re my biggest competition.”
  54. Why did the candle go to the concert? To get lit.
  55. What do you call a confused candle? Disoriented and lit.
  56. Why was the candle the best comedian? Its jokes were fire.
  57. What do you call a fashionable candle? A wick in vogue.
  58. Why did the candle become a baker? It loved the heat of the oven.
  59. Why was the candle so bad at soccer? It kept getting a red card for flaring.
  60. What’s a candle’s favorite city? Candle-ary (Calgary).
  61. Why was the candle so romantic? It knew how to set the mood lighting.
  62. Why did the candle go to the gym? To burn off some wax.
  63. What’s a candle’s favorite type of music? Light rock.
  64. Why did the candle refuse to play cards? It was afraid of burning the deck.
  65. What’s a candle’s favorite type of car? A Volkswagen Light.
  66. Why was the candle great at baseball? It always had a great pitch (of black soot).
  67. What do you call a candle that’s finished burning? All burnt out.
  68. Why don’t candles make good secret agents? They’re always seen in the spotlight.
  69. What do you call a baby candle? A little light.
  70. Why do candles never win poker? They always fold under the heat.
  71. Why did the candle get kicked out of the choir? It couldn’t hold a note, just a flame.
  72. Why don’t candles ever get cold? They always have a warm glow.
  73. What’s a candle’s favorite dance move? The flamenco.
  74. Why did the candle join the band? It wanted to be in the limelight.
  75. Why do candles make terrible chefs? They melt under the heat of the kitchen.
  76. What’s a candle’s favorite film genre? Light-hearted comedy.
  77. Why did the candle visit the beach? It wanted to glow in the sun.
  78. Why was the candle a great gardener? It knew when to sow and when to reap.
  79. Why did the candle get a job in construction? It wanted to bring light to the project.
  80. Why did the candle go to the bar? To have a light beer.
  81. Why was the candle so good at yoga? It could hold a pose even when the heat was turned up.
  82. Why was the candle a great writer? Its ideas were always bright.
  83. Why did the candle go to the football match? It was a fan of the Sparks.
  84. What’s a candle’s favorite type of cake? A light sponge.
  85. Why did the candle date the lamp? It was attracted to its brightness.
  86. What did the candle say to the lighthouse? “You’re a beacon of hope.”
  87. What do you call a grumpy candle? A hot head.
  88. Why did the candle join the police force? It wanted to shed light on the truth.
  89. Why did the candle start a diary? It wanted to keep the flame of memories alive.
  90. What’s a candle’s favorite animal? The firefly.
  91. Why did the candle join the orchestra? It wanted to be in the limelight.
  92. Why did the candle go to the zoo? It wanted to see the fireflies.
  93. Why did the candle join the army? It wanted to hold the torch of honor.
  94. Why was the candle a good chess player? It could see the next move even in the dark.
  95. Why did the candle become a lifeguard? It loved to glow by the pool.
  96. What’s a candle’s favorite type of joke? A bright one-liner.
  97. Why did the candle become a journalist? It wanted to shed light on stories.
  98. What did the candle say to the wind? “You’re blowing me away.”
  99. Why don’t candles ever quit? They burn with passion.
  100. What did the candle say to the firecracker? “You’re a blast.”
  101. Why was the candle a terrible painter? It always drew light figures.
  102. Why did the candle open a bakery? It loved the scent of freshly baked bread.
  103. Why did the candle go to a comedy show? It wanted a good laugh.
  104. Why did the candle start a podcast? It wanted to spread the light of knowledge.
  105. Why did the candle join the space mission? It wanted to be a star.
  106. What do you call a scared candle? Terrified and lit.
  107. Why did the candle join the spelling bee? It knew how to spell ‘light’.
  108. Why did the candle start a band? It wanted to set the stage on fire.
  109. What did the candle say to the flashlight? “I got it from my great-great-grandparents.”
  110. Why did the candle go shopping? It needed a new wick.
  111. Why did the candle start a blog? It wanted to share its burning thoughts.
  112. What do you call a tired candle? Burnt out and snoozing.
  113. Why did the candle go to the amusement park? It loved the Ferris wheel’s lights.
  114. Why did the candle join the debate team? It was good at making bright arguments.
  115. What did the candle say to the lantern? “You light up my world.”
  116. Why did the candle go to the spa? It needed to wax off.
  117. Why did the candle become a director? It had a burning desire for cinema.
  118. Why did the candle go to the casino? It was on a hot streak.
  119. Why did the candle go to the fashion show? It loved the runway lights.
  120. What do you call a candle’s autobiography? “The Light of My Life.”
  121. Why did the candle start a travel blog? It wanted to see the world’s brightest spots.
  122. Why was the candle great at golf? It had a great swing and was always on fire.
  123. Why was the candle a terrible runner? It was always burning its soles.
  124. Why did the candle refuse to join the race? It didn’t want to burn out too fast.
  125. Why did the candle join the soccer team? It wanted to carry the torch of victory.
  126. What do you call a candle that’s a great swimmer? A light float.
  127. Why did the candle join a rock band? It was drawn to the stage lights.
  128. Why was the candle great at solving puzzles? It could always find a light in the darkness.
  129. Why did the candle get a job at the library? It wanted to bring light to great stories.
  130. Why did the candle become a photographer? It had an eye for light and shadow.
  131. What do you call a fitness enthusiast candle? Burn fit and lit.
  132. Why was the candle a great salesperson? It knew how to highlight the best features.
  133. Why did the candle become an electrician? It was fascinated by light and circuits.
  134. What did the candle say to the power outage? “I got this.”
  135. Why did the candle become a coach? It loved to ignite passion in others.
  136. Why did the candle start a motivational speaking career? It wanted to light up people’s lives.
  137. What do you call a candle that loves to read? Bookish and bright.
  138. Why did the candle become a sailor? It wanted to navigate by the stars’ light.
  139. What do you call a candle that’s a great dancer? Light-footed and graceful.
  140. Why was the candle a great mathematician? It understood the angles of light and shadow.
  141. Why did the candle become an architect? It wanted to design houses with great natural light.
  142. Why did the candle go to the opera? It loved the spotlight.
  143. Why was the candle a great leader? It knew how to guide in the darkest times.
  144. Why did the candle start a cooking show? It loved to set the kitchen on fire.
  145. Why was the candle great at investments? It had a bright outlook on stocks.
  146. Why did the candle become a poet? It was fascinated by the light of the moon.
  147. Why did the candle go to the museum? It loved the soft gallery lights.
  148. What do you call a candle that loves fashion? A style light-con.
  149. Why did the candle become a filmmaker? It had a passion for dramatic lighting.
  150. Why was the candle a great friend? It was always there to light up your day.

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