96 needle puns

  1. I was going to tell a joke about a needle, but it seemed too pointless.
  2. Sewing is a stitch-uation that needs a needle to fix.
  3. That sewing kit needs somepoint to prove.
  4. I’ve got a point to thread, and it’s all about needles.
  5. I tried to find a needle in a haystack, but I couldn’t pin it down.
  6. Life is sew good when you have a needle.
  7. That needle has some sharp humor.
  8. I lost my needle, now I’m in stitches.
  9. I got a new job in embroidery. It’s quite a-purl-ing.
  10. Tried to start a needle business, but it didn’t have a point.
  11. Needles always find a way to seam it together.
  12. Needles: for when life gets thready.
  13. I tried to make a needle pun, but it just wasn’t sharp enough.
  14. I have a phobia of needles – it’s a very pointed issue.
  15. They told me not to run with scissors, but they never said anything about needles.
  16. My needle seems a bit threadbare.
  17. The needle got lost in the crowd – it was a threadful situation.
  18. The needle was accused of a crime. It got off on a technical stitch.
  19. All my needle does is loop, hoop and stitch.
  20. I tried to hide my needle, but it stuck out like a sore thumb.
  21. Always remember, a good needle is the key to stitch-cess.
  22. I started a club for people who love needles. It’s been quite a stitch.
  23. The needle always knows where to draw the line.
  24. Needles can’t help but pick at threads.
  25. My needle always gets straight to the point.
  26. The police couldn’t find the culprit. It was like looking for a needle in a haystack.
  27. The needle just couldn’t cut it, so it decided to stitch instead.
  28. Needles have a knack for sewing things up.
  29. I thought about becoming a tailor, but I just didn’t have the needle-nose for it.
  30. My needle is always causing a stitch and run.
  31. When a needle gets lost, it always finds its way back to the pin cushion.
  32. I tried to play a song with a needle, but it was just off the record.
  33. Don’t trust a needle, they can be sew deceitful.
  34. I needle little help with this sewing project.
  35. My needle is always getting in a stitch.
  36. The needle had a job at the thread mill. It was on pins and needles the entire time.
  37. Needles always manage to weave their way into every situation.
  38. Needles are notorious for stringing people along.
  39. The needle was sew excited it couldn’t keep its thread straight.
  40. The needle couldn’t handle the pressure. It had a stitch breakdown.
  41. Needle or not, here I sew.
  42. I lost my needle, now I’m thread-bare.
  43. Needles have an eye for detail.
  44. A life without a needle would be sew unthreadable.
  45. I was sew impressed by the needle’s sharp wit.
  46. I dropped my needle. It was a stitch-tuation.
  47. I was at the end of my thread until I found my needle.
  48. The needle wanted to be a dancer, but it didn’t have the right pirouette.
  49. When it comes to needles, you really have to thread lightly.
  50. My needle is always at the top of its game – it never misses the point.
  51. That needle has a real flair for the dramatic stitch.
  52. The needle’s jokes were sew punny, they had everyone in stitches.
  53. Can you please needle little quieter?
  54. The needle tried to thread itself. It was quite the spectacle.
  55. The needle and thread were inseparable, they always stuck together.
  56. My needle got lost in the crowd. I guess it just didn’t stand out.
  57. The needle was so thin it was almost invisible.
  58. The needle was voted most likely to succeed – it always stays sharp.
  59. My needle may be small, but it packs a punch line.
  60. The needle’s wit was sharp, but it was sew worth it.
  61. The needle always threads its way through trouble.
  62. I bought a secondhand needle. It’s been through a lot.
  63. The needle was not a good golfer. It kept missing the hole.
  64. When the needle lost its thread, it felt sew alone.
  65. It’s a sew-sure thing when you have a needle.
  66. My needle’s favorite movie is “Stitch Perfect”.
  67. The needle tried to go on a diet, but it just couldn’t drop the pounds.
  68. That needle is sharp – it gets right to the point.
  69. The needle got into trouble. It’s in a real stitch.
  70. The needle couldn’t help but thread the gossip.
  71. The needle was told to go home and rest – it was running out of thread.
  72. The needle tried to join the circus but it couldn’t juggle its responsibilities.
  73. The needle loves adventure, it’s always up for a good yarn.
  74. The needle was trying to make ends meet. It was sew hard.
  75. The needle went on a date. It was a stitch in time.
  76. My needle’s favorite food is spaghetti. It loves to twirl the threads.
  77. The needle was in a hurry, it was running out of time.
  78. Needles are always on point, but they have their threadful moments.
  79. The needle was quite the storyteller, it had everyone sewn to their seats.
  80. The needle thought it was hilarious. It couldn’t stop laughing at the seam.
  81. That needle is sew selfish, it never shares its thread.
  82. The needle went to the psychiatrist – it was having sew-separation anxiety.
  83. The needle was late, but it still made it in the nick of time.
  84. The needle went to the bar, but it couldn’t hold its drink.
  85. The needle was heartbroken. It lost its thread.
  86. The needle was always the center of attention. It was a show stitch.
  87. My needle is always up for a challenge. It’s a straight shooter.
  88. The needle was on a mission – it had a point to prove.
  89. The needle was scared of the dark. It couldn’t thread without light.
  90. The needle had an existential crisis. It couldn’t find its purpose.
  91. My needle has a mind of its own. It always chooses the path of least resistance.
  92. The needle was stressed, but it kept itself together.
  93. The needle fell in love. It was love at first stitch.
  94. The needle was so vain, it always wanted to be in the spotlight.
  95. The needle was so tired, it couldn’t make the cut.
  96. The needle went to the gym, but it couldn’t lift a weight.

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